Give Love Then Take It Back
by squishyrainbows
Summary: The squeal to my first ATL story Battle Of The Bands
1. Chapter 1

All songs used in this are already songs that have been made. We're going to pretend that they aren't in this story, okay? Good (:

Six months later

June 20th

"And to conclude our end of the year assembly please welcome For the Record performing their new hit single Should've Tried Harder!"

I ran onto the stage and immediately started singing and playing guitar while everyone sang along. I jumped in sync with Taylor and Haylee – something that took a long time to perfect because we'd always land at different times. The school that we've performed for too many times to count in the last six months were into it just like every other time and were dancing.

The song finished too soon as everyone settled down. They looked confused as to why we hadn't left the stage yet.

"So, this wasn't on the list of things we were going to do today, but I thought hey – I might as well make a speech while up here," I explained to the crowd, strumming my guitar lightly. "I've a got a question for you guys. Who's ready for summer?"

They all screamed loudly. Of course they were excited.

"Of course you guys are!" I smiled, "You guys get to sleep in and party every night for the next two months. Who wouldn't be excited? But while you guys are partying it up, the four of us will be travelling across the country in a tiny van."

More cheers came from the crowd.

"Who's going to miss us?" Kim asked from behind her drums, smiling as everyone screamed.

"Who's coming out to the show we're going to play here on August 23rd?" I asked, "And buy our album when it comes out, whenever that is?"

"God we're so needy," Kim joked and everyone laughed.

"Who are you touring with?" Someone yelled out.

"We have no clue," I answered, "all we know is that it's with All Time Low and some other band. We actually find out later today. Watch our tour updates to find out."

"I think we should play them another song before we have to go," Haylee said and everyone cheered again.

I strummed the intro to Mine by Taylor Swift. I may hate her and her music but it was the first song I thought of. We performed it and then left the stage. Alex, Jack, Rian and Zack greeted us.

I was instantly in Alex's arms. It's where I'd been for the past six months and planned to be for the rest of my life.

The past six months had been oddly smooth in all aspects of life. Alex and I were still going strong, even though we've had a few big fights, but that's normal right? I managed to find a way to balance school, gigs, practice and recording session by mid-February, I just had no time for a social life. But I guess when you live with your boyfriend and you're in a band with you best friends, that's all you really need.

Days after the we got news we were going on a cross country tour with a big name band and All Time Low we knew that was when we needed to take this seriously. We started recording an album the third week of January. Every other weekend was spent in the studio recording and writing. It was fun but it also was a lot of hard work trying to get the songs to sound how we wanted and picking the songs to go on the album.

We also had photo shoots to do for the inside booklet, titles and color schemes to plan and a set list to create. You'd think having six months to do all of that would be enough, but when you also have two hours of homework to do, it tends to take a while.

But nevertheless we got it done. We had decided to call the album Take Off since this was the takeoff of our careers, hopefully. The photo shoot was a lot of fun since we got to throw paint at each other in white clothes.

We had even released a music video to go with our single Should've Tried Harder. It was basically a montage of our performances and shit we did in the studio since someone always had a camera and it seemed like every band released a video like that. The video had actually gotten a good 20,000 views on YouTube which was really surprising to us. We had gathered a moderately sized fan base in a few other cities along with our own.

I was actually really excited for the tour and not knowing who we were going on tour with was making me so anxious. I was desperately hoping for it to be Paramore or Fall Out Boy. I knew the FOB one wouldn't happen but Paramore could. The next three months were going to be spent crammed into a van with three other people driving across the country. What could go wrong?

Actually, a lot could go wrong but let's not think about that.

We spent the next hour saying goodbye to all our "friends", if you will. I didn't consider a single one of them my actual friend. They only acknowledged us because of everything that had happened. If it wasn't for us winning, half these people wouldn't even talk to us.

After a lot of fake smiles and cheesy goodbyes we pushed our way out of the school and to our cars. Alex had got a new car in February since the other one was totalled. All of our injuries had healed perfectly and we were able to get back into being wild on stage –something I missed a lot. Just standing there was absolutely no fun.

"I'm so glad we don't have to see this goddamn place for two months," Kim said unlocking the van.

"Maybe longer if we're lucky and the tour is extended," Taylor added.

"Does anyone know when it even ends?" I asked.

Everyone shook their heads or shrugged.

"Who cares?" Alex said. "It ends when it ends. Let's enjoy this. This is going to be the best summer of our lives."

He put it in a way that you couldn't not believe. This was definitely going to be an amazing summer full of adventure. I was so excited I was shaking. I couldn't wait to hit the road.

"Do you think if we ask nicely we can upgrade to a huge bus?" Kim asked looking at the white van we were standing by. It looked like a pedo van – white and almost windowless.

"Be thankful," Haylee said, "It could be a lot worse."

"Yeah, we could have a lead singer who isn't rich," Taylor laughed.

"Ah, I see. That's the only reason you keep me around, isn't it?" I joked.

"Why else would we keep you around, you can't sing," She went along with me.

"I could be sick with laryngitis and still sound ten times better than you."

"OOHH," Everyone laughed.

"So everyone meets here at 7am?" Kim confirmed.

"Yup," I nodded, "We meet Richard and Mike so that they can tell us who we're going on tour with finally."

"Are Matt and Vinny meeting us here too?" Kim asked Alex.

He nodded. "They should be, but I'll text Matt to make sure."

Kim nodded too and then got into the van with Taylor and Haylee after kissing Jack. I followed Alex to his car and got in the passenger's side. I bounced my knees up and down while he pulled out of the parking lot and headed home.

"Excited?" He chuckled.

"Only slightly," I smiled. I turned up his sound system that pumped out Blink 182.

Once we got back to his house we started packing since we hadn't bothered to. I grabbed my suite cases and started tossing clothes in them. Shorts, tank tops, t-shirts, skinnies, underwear, socks, and hoodies. Basically everything that I had at Alex's went into the bag. Another bag was filled with shoes. The third was makeup, hair shit, and anything odds and ends that I would end up needing.

Alex and I both finished packing at the same time. He laughed at me for having three bags opposed to his one.

"In my defense, you could fit three dead people in that bag," I said.

"It's not that big," He argued.

"Mhmm," I smiled and leaned over and kissed him. He shifted us so I was straddling him and we continued to kiss.

"Kayleigh, Alex! Dinner!" Isobel yelled up the stairs.

"I swear she has cameras in my room." Alex said as I crawled off him. I adjusted my jean short shorts I had changed into and fixed my hair. We went downstairs to find a meal of homemade hamburgers. I pushed past Alex and got to the kitchen first. You do not understand how much I love homemade burgers. I put the condiments on my bun and skipped over to the BBQ outside where Peter gave me the patty. I took a seat at the patio table and took a giant bite out of the burger.

"Mmmmmmmm," I moaned.

"I think you love that burger more than you love me," Alex laughed, taking a seat next to me.

"At the moment, I do," I said.

"Well then," He sniffed.

"Don't worry, I'll love you again once there's no more burger to love," I laughed and then started to choke which caused me to laugh harder. I had no idea why I was laughing so hard but I just couldn't stop. Finally the lump of food went down my throat and I could breathe properly again. This time I took a smaller bite of the burger. I really didn't want to die the day before going on tour for the first time.

After dinner Alex and I decided to watch a movie with his parents since we were going to be gone for so long. It wasn't much of a gesture but it's the thought that counted. When the movie was over Alex and I went to bed, but not until after some extracurricular activities.

The sound of my alarm going off at 6 in the morning on the first day of summer was the most unpleasant thing ever. Waking up next to Alex naked, however, wasn't. It took a while for us to get out of bed but when we realized that it was 6:30 and we only had half an hour we jumped up and got ready.

I didn't bother with makeup since the first show wasn't until tomorrow and everyone already knows what I look like without makeup anyways. I threw on a pair of Alex's sweats and a tank top. We said goodbye to his parents and walked to the school instead of taking his car.

We got there at 7:10 and everyone else was already there.

"Always fucking late," Kim shook her head. She had picked up the trailer last night that was now attached to the back of the van with all our equipment. An almost identical van was parked right next to ours. The door was wide open, showing that the inside was already a mess of bags.

I dropped my bags on the ground and opened one, pulling out a giant sticker of our logo that was on our album cover. I peeled off the back and with Taylor's help stuck it on the side of the van.

"Bam, we now have style," I laughed.

"Oh my God, you know what we should do?" Kim said, coming over with another sticker. "Every city that we're in we should find a sticker and stick it to the van."

She slapped on the other sticker with the name of our hometown on it.

"Yes!" I agreed, "Write that down or we're only going to get half of the cities because we'll never remember."

She pulled out her phone and walked away from us.

"Alex, what do you want done with these?" Someone asked. We both turned to see a kid not much older than us holding a bunch of wires. I started at him in his Mickey Mouse hoodie and skinnies. He had his lip pierced and dark hair. In one word he was hot.

"Oh, just throw them in the trailer somewhere," Alex answered. I watched as the kid nodded and then walked over to All Time Low's van. There was just something about him.

"Kayleigh!" Taylor yelled at me.

"Yeah?" I blinked, turning my attention to her. "Who's that?"

"Matt Flyzing? Flykat? Fly something," She answered. "The tour manager, remember?"

"Uh, no." I shook my head. I remembered that we had made an agreement to share a tour manager and merch guy since we only had so much room, but I don't remember the tour manager being so hot.

Whoa, Kayleigh. You have a boyfriend that you're 150% in love with –s top ogling the TM.

"Oh, well, yeah that's him, and that one," She point over to the other side of the van, "Is Vinny."

"Awesome," I nodded and then went back over to Alex as a distraction. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed me.

"I'm so excited," He grinned.

"Me too," I forced a believable smile.

"They're here," Kim announced coming back over to us. By them I assumed she meant Mike and Richard.

"What were you doing?" I asked.

"I have every show date on my phone so I made a reminder to get a sticker in each city," She answered.

Mike and Richard came over to talk to us.

"Are you guys ready for this?" Mike asked. We all nodded excitedly.

"Can you tell us who we're going on tour with now?" Kim asked.

"You guys still don't know?" Richard asked. "I would've thought you guys would've googled it or something by now."

"None of us thought of that," I mumbled and they laughed.

"Oh, well then. You're opening for Fall Out Boy's reunion tour with Marianas Trench." Mike said.

So chapter one of the sequel. Do you like it? Should I keep going?


	2. Chapter 2

I could've sworn my heart had stopped beating and I couldn't breathe.

We. Were. Opening. For. Fall. Out. Boy. WewereopeningforFallOutBoy. WE WERE FUCKING OPENING FOR MOTHER FUCKING FALL OUT BOY.

"Are you kidding?" Kim finally asked after a few moments of stunned silence.

Richard shook his head, "Nope. They decided to get back together and do a reunion tour and then hit the studio for a new album."

"Why us though? You'd think that such a highly anticipated tour would have bigger opening bands?" Alex said.

"Ah, but that's the exact reason. This tour will be—hell it already is huge. Almost every show is sold out and most of them are huge arenas and stadiums. You'll be playing for at least five to six thousand people every night. People who are just finding out about this tour are probably googling you guys to see what you sound like," Mike explained.

"Basically you're skipping some of the steps. Instead of starting out in small clubs you'll be playing sold out arenas. Of course, you aren't the headlining band but this will get you noticed and noticed fast." Richard continued.

Their strategy made sense but also made me a million times more nervous. We were going to be with Pete, Patrick, Joe and Andy, not to mention Josh, Matt, Ian and Mike from Marianas Trench who I was also a huge fan of. The rational part of me tried to tell me that they wouldn't even bother talking to us or acknowledging us but the hopeful fangirl blocked it out.

"I hope you guys have fun and call if you need anything. We have connections and help in every city," Mike said and then they left.

"Holy titty fuck!" Jack yelled.

"Oh my God," I said. "I cannot believe this is happening."

We all just stood there taking in everything until Matt came over to us.

"Are we leaving or?"

Alex snapped out of the silence first, "Yeah man, we should go."

We all nodded and then got into the vans. Kim took first driving shift and I took passenger's side. Haylee and Taylor piled into the back. We had taken the third row of seats out so we had more room to lay down and sleep.

"Where to first?" I asked.

"The tour starts in Chicago," She said. It made sense why the first show started there now.

She pulled out in front of Alex and headed towards the freeway. I turned up From Under the Cork Tree since I thought it was an appropriate time to play it.

We arrived in Chicago at around 6 in the evening. We would've been there sooner but Jack pulled over every hour to piss and we weren't going to drive away without the guys close behind or in front of us. None of us knew the country very well so if we were going to get lost we were going to do it together.

We drove to the venue just to make sure we knew where it was. That's where the adventure began. We had planned on parking somewhere random to sleep and not in a hotel. It was a waste of money to only spend one night and we needed to stay on budget just in case Dad cut me off at any time. We still weren't on the best of terms. Maybe we'd sort things out when we played in New York.

We weren't expecting a tour bus to be sitting in the parking lot of the venue. We didn't know whose it was so we pulled up a little ways from it and got out. Pretending to not notice the bus just over 100ft away we looked up at the huge venue.

"Can you believe our first show on our first tour is in a sold out arena in Chicago?" Alex said.

"Not at all," I said. "Someone pinch me I'm dreaming!"

Alex pinched me softly and I laughed. I heard a door open and looked over my shoulder to see someone get off the bus.

"Hey look, newbies!" The figure said. I couldn't clearly see the person but the voice was unmistakeable. Josh Ramsay started walking towards us – well more like skipping.

"Who's that?" Alex asked.

"What do you mean who's that?" Josh asked, obviously hearing Alex's bad attempt at being quiet. "How can you not know who I am? I'm Josh, duh."

I could tell by his talkativeness that he was slightly drunk already.

"The real question is who are you?" He asked.

"I'm Kayleigh, this is Alex, and that's Kim, Haylee, Taylor, Zack, Rian, Jack, Vinny and Matt," I said pointing to each person.

"Wow, there are a lot of you."

"Only ten," Haylee said.

"Yeah, only," He laughed, "So what're you kids up to tonight?"

"Nothing," I shrugged, "We just came to check out the venue and then probably find a dark alley to sleep in."

"Well that's no fun." Matt said from behind Josh. "Why don't we get a hotel and see what adventures we can dig up there?"

"Sounds like a plan," I nodded. They headed towards their bus and we all got back into the vans.

"What happened to not getting a hotel tonight?" Taylor asked as we followed the bus out of the parking lot.

"If you're so against the idea then sleep in the van," Kim said. "We're about to go party with Marianas Trench. Shut up and enjoy it."

I stayed silent but agreed with Kim. Taylor was always trying to rationalize things and she basically sucked the fun out of everything. She needs to stop thinking and start living.

A while later we pulled up in front of a fancy hotel I didn't catch the name of. Josh, Ian, Mike and Matt got out and the bus pulled away.

"Go park while I pay," I told Kim and got out, joining for four boys.

"Are you ready for one hell of a night?" Josh asked. He had a case of coke zero in one hand a bottle of Jack Daniels in the other.

I nodded and grinned, leading the way into the hotel.

"So, I'll just give you the money and you can book the rooms right?" I looked at Josh.

"You can't do it yourself?"

"I'm not 18 yet."

"Dude, seriously?" His eyes widened. "I thought you were like 19."

"Nope, I'm only 17." I laughed.

"We're going to party with minors?" Ian asked, "Even better."

I handed Josh my credit card and he went up to the desk. Kim and the others entered the lobby and came to stand with us.

"I love being me," Josh grinned, returning to the group and handing my card back to me.

"Why?" Alex asked.

"The chick at the desk knew who I was. Our two $400 rooms are now free."

He high fived Matt and then headed towards to the elevator with us following. We piled into the elevator, taking it to the 17th floor. We found rooms 1702 and 1703 and entered them. And that's when things went nuts.

It started with simple shots that turned into strongly mixed drinks that turned into drinking straight from the bottle. Mike and Ian had to do a booze run after we downed the two bottles we had. Somewhere in the twenty minutes they were gone the alcohol really hit in since none of us had eaten. I found the magical button that turned the stereo on and somehow in my half drunken state I managed to hook it up to the surround sound.

A lot more shots later, Kim and I started dancing on the beds, jumping back and forth between them. I attempted a flip and hit the ground face first. I lay on the ground for a good five minutes just laughing. Kim had fallen onto a bed laughing at me. I sat up, my head spinning in the bed way and tried to get up. Instead I fell back down laughing.

Across the room Jack and Vinny were having a puppet show with socks and empty beer bottles. Alex had completely disappeared with Rian and Matt with half a case of beer. I didn't know where Matt or Ian was and Josh and Mike were just laughing at nothing.

"Strip poker time!" I announced crawling across the floor to the table. I stood up with a lot of help from the table.

"Do you even know how to play poker?" Kim yelled at me.

"Nope!" I yelled back, grabbing the deck of cards. I wobbled across the room and opened the door to find Alex and Rian in the hallway. Alex was laying on his back laughing and Rian was sitting, rocking back and forth.

"Come play strip poker," I demanded, stepping over Alex and threw open the other door. Haylee and Zack were on one of the beds, half naked.

"What?" Haylee asked.

"I was going to make you come play strip poker but it looks like you guys have done enough stripping." I said leaving the room without closing the door. Alex and Rian had left the hallway and entered the room. Everyone had gathered around the table other than Jack and Vinny who were still doing their puppet show.

Josh dealt the cards since he was the most sober.

An hour into the game all I had left were my underwear, Alex had his boxers left, Kim had only dropped her sweater, Matt was shirtless, Josh had his shirt and underwear left and Rian was still fully dressed. Shots were still being poured and I was even more wasted than before.

"I wanna get naked too!" Jack yelled finally taking note of our game. He stripped down to his boxers and sat down on Alex's lap.

"Hey! Get off my boyfriend!" I said, going to push him but missed and almost fell out of my chair.

"My boyfriend now!" He said and kissed Alex on the cheek.

"No!" I yelled and stood up. Jack jumped off Alex's lap as I stumbled towards him.

"Missed me! Missed me! Now I gotta kiss your boyfriend again!" He sang jumping onto the bed. I chased after him, "No, mine!" I screamed.

We ran around the room until Jack lunged for the door and took off down the hallway yelling "Mine!" Without thinking I darted into the hallway, following the sound of his laughter.

"Alex is all mine. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha!"

I turned the corner just as Jack stepped into the elevator and the door started to close.

"Noooo, I'll get you! Better yet, I'll lock you out of the room!" I yelled at him. Without waiting for his reaction I turned around and started running back to the room. I stumbled a couple times but made it back and slammed the door behind me.

"Haha! I win!" I yelled at nothing then turned around to see Alex and Matt dancing around in their underwear. Kim had a camera and was recording everything. She panned the camera over to me.

"And here we have our lead singer who has just returned from a magical adventure in the hallway." She narrated.

I did a random dance before looking at her, "I locked our boyfriend out for coming onto my boyfriend."

"HAHA! COMING ON MY BOYFRIEND!" Alex laughed. "That's funny!"

I laughed even though it really wasn't that funny and went to the table with all the alcohol. I grabbed the bottle of vodka, and that's the last thing I remember.

A loud banging woke me up. The first thing I noticed is that I was still half naked. At least I wasn't completely naked. As I stumbled over to the door I took in the sight of the room. Empty bottles, toilet paper, clothing and people littered the floor. What the fuck did we do?

I grabbed a hoodie off the floor, slipping it on and then answering the door. There were two maids standing in front of me with cleaning carts.

"You haven't checked out yet?" One asked, trying to peer around me,

.I blocked her view, "Uh, no. What time is it?"

"Three in the afternoon," She answered.

Oh fuck. "Give us half an hour okay?"

Without waiting for her response I slammed the door in her face.

"Shut the fuck up!" Someone yelled.

"No. Get your lazy asses up, now!" I said. I counted the bodies strewn across the floor. 6 out of 14 people, including me. I checked the bathroom finding Matt and Mike passed out on the floor. Eight. I left to go check the other room while Kim and Jack slowly sat up.

Haylee and Zack were in one bed, Vinny in the other. Eleven. The only ones I couldn't find were Alex, Taylor and Josh.

"Wake up! We have half an hour to pack and get out of here," I yelled. Thankfully this room had remained clean. Haylee threw a pillow at me, signalling that she was awake. I went back to the other room. Matt and Matt were sitting at the table looking like they had been run over by a truck, Rian was still sleeping half on the floor half on the couch.

"Someone wake him up. Does anyone know where Alex, Josh and Taylor are?" I asked. They all shook their heads slowly, having troubles thinking straight, let alone trying to remember where three people had gone. I dug around in the filth until I found someone's phone. I dialed Alex's number praying that he would answer only for it to go straight to voice mail. I dialed Taylor next.

"He-hello?" She mumbled.

"Where are you?" I asked, or more like demanded.

"In the van," She answered.

"Why?"

"Because you guys went nuts last night and I couldn't sleep."

"Is Alex with you?"

"No. The last time I saw him he and Jack were giving each other piggybacks down the hallway." She answered. I don't remember that happening.

"Alright. Well, can you look for him and Josh?"

"Josh is in the bathtub in Haylee's room." She informed me then hung up. Good, now I know where everyone is except my boyfriend.

I set the phone down on the table and turned to Kim. "Put clothes on. You're coming with me," Then looked at everyone else. "We have fifteen minutes to get dressed and out of here. Meet at the vans in twenty minutes. Fuck the mess, they can clean it up."

I grabbed my pants off the ground and pulled them on. I zipped the hoodie up, which I realized to be Alex's. "If anyone finds my shirt, bring it with you."

Kim and I left the room while the others started to put their clothes back on.

"What's the last thing you remember?" Kim asked.

"Locking Jack out of the room and then going to get another drink," I answered. "What about you?"

"Roughly the same. I remember Jack coming back in because you didn't actually lock the door and then filming Jack and Alex's dance off."

"They had a dance off?" I laughed as we waited for the elevator.

"Yeah, I don't know what started it though," She grinned. "We can watch everything I recorded during and after the show."

The elevator door opened and we went to step in until we noticed someone sitting in the corner half asleep.

"Alex?" I tried to hide my laugh. "How long have you been in here?"

All I got was a long moan. I chuckled and tried to pull him to his feet but my weak little arms could get him up. Kim laughed at me and grabbed his other arm. With a lot of difficulty he finally stood up by the time the elevator reached the lobby floor.

"I feel like shit," He mumbled trying to balance on his own.

"When'd you end up in the elevator?" Kim asked.

"I don't remember."

That wasn't surprising. We walked out of the hotel and towards the vans. The heat did nothing to help our hangovers. Taylor leaned against our van as we slowly walked up.

"All three of you look like shit," She laughed.

"Shut up and find us Advil or something," Kim told her, rolling her eyes.

"What even happened last night?" She asked while rummaging through bags and tossing me a bottle of Advil then pulling three bottles of water from the case.

"I don't remember much," I answered taking the pills first then handing the bottle to Alex.

"I have most of it on film," Kim said.

"That will be amazing to watch." Taylor laughed again.

A few minutes later everyone else arrived.

"Those maids did not look happy," Jack laughed.

"I don't think have the hotel was happy. You guys were so fucking loud." Haylee said.

"Goddammit why can't I remember what happened!" I complained. The one drunken night I would actually like to remember and I can't.

"Hey Matt—" Alex said. Both Matt's turned to look at Alex.

"Wait! This isn't going to work," Jack said and pointed at the younger Matt. "You are now Flyzik. Problem solved. Let's continue."

"—Can you drive to the venue? I think you're the least hung over."

Flyzik nodded and pulled the keys out of his pocket. We all separated into our vans, or bus in MT's case, and headed back to the venue.

There were already line ups of people outside of the venue as we pulled in. The crowds started cheering as we drove by.

"If only they were lined up to see us headline," Kim sighed then chuckled.

"They will be one day," I said optimistically.

Kim pulled around back and backed in so that the trailer was in line with the loading doc. Security and workers flooded out and started unloading the equipment. I got out of the van and looked at Alex who was next to me.

"Something's missing," I said to him.

"What?"

"Fall Out Boy's tour bus."

"You're right!" He agreed looking around.

"Maybe they're already here and moved their bus so we could unload?" Taylor said hopefully.

"Well let's go in and check," Kim suggested grabbing her tour I.D and heading towards the door.

Sorry this sucks. Writers block sucks. The next one will be better I swear (:


	3. Chapter 3

After searching the venue high and low, the members of Fall Out Boy were nowhere to be found and we were lost.

"This was a brilliant idea." Kim mumbled as we wondered around the dark area together. Alex got bored of walking in circles and went to help set up right before we got lost.

"Do you have your phone?" I asked.

"No, do you?"

I shook my head and laughed, "Our luck man."

We walked through the hallway we were in that I swear we had already been down before.

"Hey look, a door!" Kim pointed in front of us. We headed towards it and without knocking, threw it open.

We found ourselves in a small, empty dressing room with a couch and vanity mirrors. I took a few steps deeper into the room until a voice behind us made me jump.

"Are you supposed to be back here?"

I turned to see Pete Wentz standing in the door way. I didn't know what to do or say. Half of me wanted to start screaming and crying and the other half wanted to jump on him while screaming and crying.

"I don't actually know," Kim answered as I stood there in a stunned silence.

"Well who are you?" He asked.

"I'm Kim, and the freakishly silent one over there is Kayleigh. We play in For the Record."

"Oh, I've heard great things about you ladies over the past couple of months and have been dying to meet you," He smiled his perfect smile.

Holy shit. You hear that? Pete fucking Wentz has been wanting to meet me. ME. MEMEMEMEMEMEME. My self-control was outstanding considering the fact I wanted to scream and faint now.

"How'd you end up back here?"

"We took a wrong turn," I finally answered but my voice cracked, causing me to turn red.

"Ah, yeah. This place can be really confusing if you don't know where you're going. I'll show you back." He offered.

I forced my legs to work and followed him out of the dressing room. On the walk back he asked about our music and inspirations. Of course I told him he was one of the biggest influences on us, making him smile. As soon as we were back in the main backstage area he excused himself immediately and disappeared.

I had so many unanswered questions for him but I settled for meeting him for now. I had all tour to pester him with questions.

We had apparently been gone a while since the stage was now all set up and All Time Low was doing their sound check. I stood in the pit and watched them. They each brought their own personalities when they were one stage. Jack went wild and crazy like always, Zack was quiet and did a few jumps here and there and Alex was sexy and energetic. It drove me wild every time he smiled while singing a certain part. I'd kill to know what he was thinking when he gave those little smirks.

They finished their sound check which meant it was our turn. I jumped onto the stage.

"I'm ready!" I announced.

"No guitar?" Alex asked wiping the sweat from his face.

"Fuck." I walked over to the side of the stage that had my guitar rack and I picked up the electric blue one. I strummed a few times and grabbed a yellow pick off the top. I went back over to my mic as Kim got behind her drums and Taylor walked onto the stage. Without having to say a word all four of us broke into the intro of Careful by Paramore. It was basically our song. We played it second to last at every show and it was the first song we practiced.

We only got through two full songs and four half songs before we got bored and decided to let Marianas Trench have their sound check.

"Wow, you guys know how to party and have some insane talent," Josh commented as we walked off the stage.

"Speaking of partying, where's the camera?" Kim asked. Taylor handed it to her and I walked over to Vinny who was playing on his laptop.

"Viiiiiiiiiiiinnnny, wanna let us borrow your laptop for a minute?" I flashed him a smile that no one could say no to, not even him. He handed me the laptop and I took it over to Kim. She took the memory card out of the camera and put it in a slot on the computer.

"Prepare your anuses for this," Kim said after it was done uploading. A series of video clips came up ranging from 10 seconds to 5 minutes. She skipped the first ones, already knowing what happened. She brought up the fourth one in and clicked play.

After twenty minutes of watching shaking videos with incredibly annoying laughing that made you want to rip your ears off we had a pretty good idea of what happened. There was footage of Alex and I making out, Alex and Jack kissing, Alex and Jack dancing to Shake It, a toilet paper war, lots of male nudity and Jack puking. We still had no idea how Alex ended up in the elevator, which was something I was going to wonder for the rest of my life.

"Let's agree right now that none of this makes it on the internet, okay?" Taylor said.

"Why? You aren't in any of it," Kim said.

"It'll give us a bad image."

"How is that band that sure as fuck knows how to party hard a bad image?" She challenged.

"We'll be seen as that bad that doesn't take themselves seriously."

"You can still have fun and be serious about music too," Alex joined in.

"Well apparently little Miss. Know It All here thinks different," Kim rolled her eyes. "Here, let's vote on it as a group. Who out of the three bands doesn't give a fuck if this leaks onto the internet?"

Every hand except Taylor's went up.

"Democracy has spoken," Kim said, narrowing her eyes at Taylor, "And soon this democracy will turn into a dictatorship."

"As long as I'm king," Jack joked to lighten the mood.

"No, that means Kim will be queen," Taylor mumbled.

Before Kim could retort we heard a guitar riff coming from the stage. I turned to see Patrick, Joe and Pete standing on the stage starting their sound check. Everyone fell silent and watched in awe, realizing we were the first people to see Fall Out Boy perform together again. The random guitar riffs turned into the intro of Thanks for the Memories.

My heart pounded as I watched them perform the song. I wanted to cry tears of joy and scream. The song ended and they left the stage just as quickly as they appeared.

"Alright, now that I'm breathless let's find something to eat," Kim said, taking note of the people starting to enter the venue, "The show starts soon."

A few minutes before the show started Alex pulled me aside for a quick make out session. It had seemed to become a new pre-show ritual for him before he played, and I didn't mind one bit. Just as we were getting really into it Jack came over and literally had to drag Alex away.

I stood side-stage and watched as they ran out onto the stage after the lights went out. The crowd wasn't very loud but seemed to be interested in these three lanky, still hung over boys jumping around on stage and a drummer with a lot of talent for 17.

I ignored everyone's attempts to make me do things I actually should be doing to prepare for our set but I couldn't pull myself away from my spot. I wasn't going to miss Alex's first stadium show. I still felt bad for missing the show they played in NYE. We even got into a fight shortly after that night. It had nothing to do with the show though, but I wondered if I would have just let the stupid whore go and watched him things would've turned out different.

We had gotten into a fair share of fights over the past six months. They were mostly from being in the same house together too long and not having enough space so we got annoyed but some were huge. There was one in mid-April where I ended up staying at Kim's house for four nights because I was so angry and annoyed with him. I don't even remember what we had fought about and I had missed him by the second night but my stubbornness kept me there until I caved and called him to apologize.

Alex looked over and me and smiled as he finished their second last song. The crowd had reacted well to them and had even started moving around and jumping.

Once they finished Alex ran off stage and gave me a big, sweaty hug.

"You smell awful," I laughed, "But you guys were great!"

"Thank you!" He grinned. "That was such a rush."

"Kayleigh Ann White if you do not get your ass over here and do something productive I will shove this guitar up your ass," Kim said from across the room, holding my guitar in her hand.

I sighed dramatically and went over to her. She handed me the guitar and I took note of the snapped guitar string.

"Fuuuuuck," I mumbled taking the guitar and going to find extra strings, "Flyyyyyyyyzik."

He came around the corner, "Yeah?"

"Where are the extra strings? The fucker broke," I explained.

I followed him to the piles of equipment and lend against a speaker, watched as he rummaged through it. He bent over exposing black and white Mickey Mouse boxers.

Cute. I also noticed he had a really nice ass.

Whoa, Kayleigh. You have a boyfriend with an amazing ass, stop gawking at the newbie.

But what's the harm in looking? It's not like I'm touching him, or fantasising. I averted my eyes to a random box when he stood up.

"Is this what you need?" He asked, handing me the string.

"Yup, that's perfect, thank you," I smiled at him. He returned it shyly and then shuffled away. I set the guitar on the ground and kneeled beside it.

"Ten minutes until FTR plays!" Someone yelled.

Fuck. I need to work quickly. I carefully attached the string to the guitar and tuned it. I tightened it too much and the string snapped again.

"FUCK," I yelled grabbing the second string from the package and trying again, this time being even more careful while tuning it.

"One minute!" Was yelled out followed by, "KAYLEIGH I'M GOING TO KILL YOU."

"Give me one goddamn minute," I yelled back rushing to finish. I strummed a couple times but it was still out of tune. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

I jumped up and ran over to the side of the stage where Jack and Alex were standing. Kim, Haylee and Taylor were already on the stage playing the intro. I half threw the guitar at Alex.

"Find someone who can re-tune this in three minutes, please!" I begged him then grabbed the microphone one of the techs was holding and ran onto the stage. I jumped, did the splits in the air, landed right on beat and then started singing. I was too caught up in the moment of almost missing the right beat to start singing to realize there were over 6,000 people watching me jump around and sing on the stage.

As the song ended and I had a chance to catch my breath it hit me. I looked out at the faces staring back at me. They all stood anxiously waiting for us to do something to keep their attention held. A few seconds passed and we started playing the next song on our set list. More people started to move around surprisingly. I looked to the side to see Alex signaling to me that my guitar was good to go. I went over to the side during the break between the chorus and next verse and put the guitar on. I strummed a few times and then ran back to the microphone. I had amazing timing today.

Now that I had my guitar I didn't have to awkwardly dance around on stage and show how nervous I was.

Three songs and some failed attempts at crowd interaction later we played a Paramore cover which the crowd loved and then ended with Should've Tried Harder which a couple people actually sang along to.

It was actually disappointing when we finished Should've Tried Harder and left the stage. It was definitely the best 35 minutes of my life.

After calming down and getting my pulse down to a reasonable rate I returned to the same spot I watched Alex perform to watch Mariana's Trench. It suck a little to see the crowd go wild for them. Their reaction for us was definitely not as awesome as MT's. I could only imagine the reaction for FOB.

Even though the crowd was disconcerting I still stayed planted in the spot and watched them put on a great show. I moved once to get a bottle of water while the crews set up for Fall Out Boy but that was it.

Kim, Alex and Jack joined me when the lights went out and Fall Out Boy took the stage. I swear I almost went deaf from the roar of the crowd and they got even louder once Patrick began to sing.

During their set, Pete even promoted our bands and told everyone to go buy our albums when they came out, and who could say no to Pete Wentz?

By the time all four sets were done and we had packed everything up it was past midnight. Taylor took the night shift since she napped after our set up until we left. I stretched out on the floor of the van and was out almost instantly.

Arg, this one is kinda lame too. Feedback?


	4. Chapter 4

When I finally crawled off the floor and up to the passenger's seat, Haylee was driving and we were already in the next city.

"Where are we?" I asked.

"Milwaukee," Haylee answered, tossing me a sticker for the city along with one for Chicago.

I nodded reaching for her coffee and taking a long sip.

"What are we going to do today?" She asked me.

"Play the show?" I raised an eyebrow.

"It's not until tomorrow," Kim informed me from the backseat behind me.

"Well then, I don't know. Who's in charge of entertainment?"

"Our boyfriends," Kim answered.

"Sex in a tiny van with at least three other people in it doesn't sound that great," I chuckled.

"I didn't mean for sex, but now we obviously know what's on your mind," Kim said stretching across the two seats. "I actually meant that Jack and Alex are in charge of entertaining us on our days off."

"Who put them in charge and when?" Taylor asked.

"I did about thirty seconds ago. Keep up." She said before pulling her phone out. "Hey babe, guess what? You and Alex are in charge of entertainment tonight, okay?"

She hung up without waiting for his response. "There. They have two hours to figure something out."

We followed closely behind All Time Low's van through the city. We got the feeling they didn't know where they were going. Out of nowhere Alex and Jack popped their heads out of the window and started yelling at the people on the street. Everyone either ignored them or gave them really fucked up looks.

Whoever was driving led us out of the city.

"Dude, I don't think Zack knows where he's going," Kim said.

I looked out the back window seeing the two sleek buses behind us, "MT and FOB are still following us so maybe he does."

We anxiously waited to see where Zack was leading us. He finally pulled over a good 15 miles outside of the city beside a giant open field. Kim jumped out of the van at the same time Zack did.

"Where are we?" She demanded.

"Just outside of Milwaukee," He grinned.

"Thank Captain Obvious." She rolled her eyes. "Why is everyone taking me so literally today?"

"What're we doing here?" Haylee asked him.

"We're going to play football."

Without warning a football came flying out of All Time Low's van and nailed me in the side of the head. Everyone burst into laughter as I fell to the ground.

Have I ever mentioned how much I don't like playing sports?

"What's so funny?" Jack asked coming out of the van.

"Whoever threw that ball nailed Kay in the side of the head," Kim said between giggles.

"Alex, stop abusing your girlfriend!" Jack yelled into the van. Alex poked his head out.

"What're you talking about?" He looked at me still sitting on the ground and the ball a few feet away and it clicked. "Fuck! Sorry, I was aiming for Zack."

He jumped out of the van and came over to me, extending his hand to help me up. I took it and he pulled me to my feet and immediately started to brush the grass off my ass while I took the time to appreciate his torso that was uncovered. I assumed that he was changing while looking for the football.

"Alright! Who's on what team?" Jack said after Alex had finished grooming me. "And someone go harass the other bands to play with us."

"I will," I volunteered to get out of being a captain, or picked. I walked over to the parked buses and knocked on the door. Patrick answered.

"Who are you?" He asked.

I felt discouraged that he didn't know who I was, "I'm Kayleigh, I play in one of the opening bands and we want to know if you and the rest of Fall Out Boy want to play football with us."

He thought about it for a minute, "Why not? I'll get Pete and Joe and wake Andy up and we'll join you shortly."

"Awesome," I grinned. I was expecting a no to be honest. I skipped over to Marianas Trench's bus and took a different approach. Instead of knocking I threw the door open and step on.

"Alright girls, let's go play some football!" I yelled at the four men lounging around.

"No, the sunlight burns!" Josh yelled back cringing at the sunlight that came in through the open door. Their bus was freakishly dark.

"You aren't a vampire Ramsay, now let's go, go, go!"

He gave a dramatic sigh and got off the couch. "This game better be rigged for us to win then."

Matt, Ian and Mike followed us off the bus at the same time Fall Out Boy came out of theirs. We all walked over to where Jack and Zack were picking teams.

After a few arguments of who were the better players, started and ended by Jack, we finally had two teams. Jack's team consisted of Kim, Me, Rian, Pete, Andy, Mike, Ian and Joe. Zack had Alex, Josh, Patrick, Matt, Flyzik, Vinny, Taylor and Haylee.

I stood next to Kim who was crouched behind Jack. He putted the ball to her after yelling out a bunch of random words. She passed it to me and I took off down the field towards the marker. I looked behind me and screamed when I saw Alex and Josh a few feet behind me.

Remember how I said I sucked at sports? This was no exception. I tried to run faster but was easily out run by Alex who wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into his as we ran. He kissed my cheek as a distraction while Josh grabbed the ball from me and turned in the opposite direction.

"Hey!" Kim yelled at Alex. "That's totally interference!"

"How?" He asked innocently.

"There's no kissing on the field!"

"Please, tell me where this rule is written?" He challenged, grinning.

"I don't think it's an official rule," Jack joined in.

"Well it is now!" Kim declared.

"Fiiiiine," Alex sighed and let go of my waist. We went back to the starting line and started again.

As much as I hated sports, I'd be lying if I said I didn't have fun. Zack's team ended up winning by one touch down because I wiped out trying to stop Alex. We all piled into the buses and vans sweaty, dirty and in great moods. We decided to get a hotel again tonight since we all needed to shower. This time we actually had to pay for the rooms, but we had the money.

The 18 of us made our way up to the 14th floor and found our rooms which were all in the same hallway. I assumed from our lack of alcohol and age we weren't going to have a wild night partying, but I've been wrong before.

"Next time I'm picking the hotel," Kim declared as we entered the room.

"Why?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Because these ones are tiny. I want to at least party in a penthouse suite once on this tour."

"Do you know how much that would cost?"

She shrugged, "We can live off chips and candy for a couple weeks."

"I seriously hope you're joking," Taylor said from the other side of the room. She dropped her bag on the ground and flopped onto the couch.

"Obviously I was fucking joking," Kim rolled her eyes. "But only about the food part. I'm not joking when I say I'm picking the next hotel and we will party in a penthouse suite. They don't have to be at the same time."

I watched as Taylor rolled her eyes as Kim disappeared into the bathroom for a shower. Their constant bickering was getting worrisome. Ever since Taylor quit the band for a while back in October her and Kim haven't been the best of friends. I think that was obvious to everyone. I know it's nothing big now, but at the same time, isn't that how big things start? Yeah it may just be childish bickering, but one day one of them is going to snap and go off. Who knows, maybe one of them will quit, and then we will be fucked. Or maybe I was just overthinking the whole situation.

I made the decision to just leave it alone until something big happens and then do something about it then.

I went over to the couch and took a seat next to Taylor.

"Sup?" I nodded.

"Why is she such a bitch?" Taylor asked. "What the fuck makes her think she's the greatest damn thing that's ever walked this goddamn planet when she really isn't anywhere close to it?"

"You know she isn't really like that," I started but she cut me off.

"You're only saying that because she's your best friend."

"Well yeah, but it's true and you and Haylee are my best friends too," I said.

"But Kim's obviously your favorite." She looked at me.

"It's not that she's my favorite it's that she was the first. She was the first one out of you three to reach out and try to be friends with me while you and Haylee did nothing. Don't think I didn't see you pass me in the hallways like I was invisible until Kim brought me into the group."

Taylor was in a really stubborn mood, "But doing one good thing for you doesn't make up for the fact that she's a bitch to me."

"She's not a bitch to you; she's a bitch to everyone. But it's not even that, you just take things way too seriously. She doesn't mean 90% of the things she says. It's called sarcasm and joking around."

"Half the time it doesn't sound like she's joking."

I sighed and started to get annoying. "Then don't comment on it if you don't know whether it's a joke or not."

I got up before she could reply and grabbed the keys to the van. "I'm going to get food."

I left the room at the same time Alex was coming out of his.

"Oh hey, I was just about to come see you," He grinned at me then noticed the keys in my hand, "Going somewhere?"

"To get food. Take a walk with me?" I held out my hand and he immediately intertwined our fingers and we walked down the hallway together. We waited for the elevator and when we got in there was a flock of photographers in it.

"Hey, you two look young and into the music scene. Would you by change know which hotel Fall Out Boy is staying in?" One of them asked us.

"Do you have an interview to do with them?" I asked.

"Well, kinda. It's what I'd like to consider a surprise interview," The reporter grinned.

"I heard they were staying at the Ritz on the other side of town," Alex lied smoothly.

"Alright thanks!"

As soon as we got to the lobby the photographers basically ran out of the elevator and out to their cars.

"Wow, some people are just desperate for interviews. At least have the common curtsey to ask for an interview before "surprising" them," I rolled my eyes. Alex nodded as we walked through the door that led to the underground parking lot. The vans and buses were parked at the far end, away from all the other cars.

"So you know the one really lame thing about being on tour?" Alex said as I fumbled with the keys to unlock the van door.

"Hmmm?"

"We barely get any alone time since we live in a van."

I got the door unlocked and slide it open. I turned around to face Alex and wrapped my arms around his neck, my finger instinctively snaking through his hair.

"Well," I looked up at him, "We're alone now."

I pulled his head down and began to kiss him slowly, but he wasn't having any of that. He deepened and roughened the kiss, pushing me against the side of the van. He hand one hand on my waist and the other exploring my body. I bit his lip and pulled off his black jacket, tossing it in the van.

Alex pressed himself against me and I could feel his excitement. He moved his hands so that they were just under my butt and lifted me off the ground. I jumped up and wrapped my legs around him, leaving me suspended in the air with him keeping me up. He broke the kiss and started nibbling on my neck.

"I want you, right here, right now," He whispered in my ear, giving me chills.

My only reply was a soft moan in his ear. I wrapped my arms around his neck as he carried me into the van and laid me down on the floor. Reason number one why I wanted the van to stay clean – it makes doing things like this a lot easier. We broke apart for a brief moment while Alex slammed the door closed behind him, locking it just in case.

"I think we need to put down an air mattress or something," I laughed started to get my clothes back on. Getting dressed in the back of a van is not as easy as you would think, especially when your pants are as tight as mine and you need a lot of space to jump around in to get them on.

Alex went to reply when I shushed him. I heard a voice that sounded familiar.

"Jesus Christ she went to get food two hours ago, where the fuck did she go?" Kim's voice echoed through the parking lot. We had no time to react when the back door was unlocked and thrown open.

I reached for a sweater to cover myself and Alex since I only had pants and a bra on while Alex hadn't even started getting dressed. Kim shook her head.

"And then there are times like this that I wish I didn't have a spare key," She chuckled. "Next time do it in All Time Low's van and not ours. And crack a window."

She closed the door and Alex and I burst into laughter.

"Did you see the horrified look on Haylee's face?" He laughed.

"Poor girl is probably scarred for life now," I smiled.

"Hey!"

"What? I didn't insult you."

"Directly," He said.

"Pfft," I leaned over and kissed him. "But we should probably go back to the rooms."

We got dressed with some difficulties and then left the van, but not before I grabbed two bags of chips and beef jerky that I had originally come to get.

We walked hand in hand back up to the room. Both bands had moved into our room and were gathered in the living room.

"Ha! Kim you owe me $15," Haylee cheered and held her hand out as Kim tossed the bills at her.

"What'd you guys make a bet on?" I asked.

"If you guys were going to go for round two or come back up," Haylee said, "I obviously said that you guys were going to come back up."

I laughed and rolled my eyes. Of course they'd bet on mine and Alex's sex life. I noticed the 24 pack of beer box lying by the door.

"Who bought?" I asked, going to the fridge and taking one.

"I convinced Josh and Matt to buy us some. They agreed to do it only if we didn't go crazy like we did last time." Kim explained as I took a seat on the couch between her and Haylee.

"We probably won't," I shrugged. "What're you guys doing right now anyway?"

"Trying to decide between playing monopoly and watching a movie," Taylor said.

"Monopoly," I said jumping up and grabbing the box that was on the counter. "And not a single one of you have a choice, you're all playing."

Flyzik and Zack groaned in protest. "But it's so goddamn boring," Zack complained.

"Yeah, when there's, like four people. There are ten of us so it's bound to get interesting," I said while setting it up on the coffee table. Everyone gathered around and picked a playing piece. We all rolled the dice to see who went first. Alex rolled the highest number and rolled.

I completely lost track of time as we took turns rolling the dice and moving our pieces around the board. Somehow Jack was winning with the most money and most properties.

"I don't understand how you have so much fucking money," Haylee said looking at the stack of colorful papers in his hand.

"Dude, he owns half the board. We basically have to pay him to roll," I pointed out, and just to prove my point I landed on one of his properties. I tossed the fake bills at him.

"You know what the best part is?" He grinned. We all looked at him, "As soon as it's my turn, all your fuckers get to pay me more when I put houses on them!"

We all groaned. "Do you want me to go bankrupt?" Kim asked.

"Possibly, but if you do you can come live in one of my little green houses."

True enough to his word the second Haylee was done paying him he bought houses for every single property he owned. Two turns later Zack, Rian and Haylee went bankrupt and left the game.

"Bring me more beer!" I yelled at Haylee as she got up and went into the kitchen.

"We're out!" She yelled back.

"Go harass Josh for some then," I told her. She complied and left the room.

"Aren't we cool, getting other bands to buy us alcohol," Alex laughed as he just avoided Jack's kingdom of houses.

Kim rolled next and landed on the most expensive place.

"Oh my God, for fuck sakes Jack," She said handing him the money, "No sex for a month for you."

"That's harsh. It's just a game," Taylor said.

"Dude, I was just kidding," Kim rolled her eyes.

"It didn't sound like it," Taylor mumbled.

"That's because you don't know what a joke is," Kim echoed my earlier thoughts.

"I do so; you just don't know how to make proper jokes."

Oh Lordy. Here it goes.

"Proper jokes? Really? Please, give me an example of a proper joke," She challenged. "What the fuck is a proper joke, like honestly? Get your head out of your ass Taylor and just fucking chill out. Why does everything have to be so damn serious with you?"

"Why does everything have to be a joke to you?" Taylor shot back.

"At least I'm trying to have fun with my life unlike you."

"I'm sorry my idea of fun isn't get shitfaced and dancing like a slut with my boyfriend."

"At least I can get a fucking boyfriend," Kim snickered. Before anyone could stop her, Taylor picked up her glass of coke and threw it at Kim.


	5. Chapter 5

The liquid hit her in the face and ran down onto her pants. An ice cube even managed to make it down her shirt.

Everyone sat in a stunned silence as Kim wiped the drink from her face. She reached around Vinny between them and slapped Taylor across the face.

"Stupid bitch," Kim said.

Taylor stood up and I jumped up to stand between them. Vinny grabbed Kim, who also tried to stand up while Jack got up and moved next to Kim. He kept her on the couch and out of Taylor's reach.

"Alright, it looks like you two need a time out," I said.

"We aren't five," Taylor snapped.

"No you aren't but you sure as hell are fucking acting like it." I looked at her. "You both need to calm the fuck down."

They both stood there glaring at each other until Kim looked down at Jack, "I'm staying in your room tonight."

Rian opened his mouth to say something when Alex cut him off, obviously knowing what he was going to say, "I'll stay here with Kayleigh then."

"Good," Taylor mumbled, "The wicked bitch of the van won't be here tonight."

I gave her a sharp look, "Taylor, shut your mouth."

She rolled her eyes at me and made an annoyed noise before disappearing into one of the bedrooms, but not before slamming the door so hard the drinks on the table shook.

"Drama fucking queen," Kim muttered.

"Don't," I sighed, "We don't need any more drama tonight."

"I won't, but I am going to shower since I'm all sticky now. Join me?" She looked down at Jack who stood up immediately. Kim picked up her bag and started towards the doors.

"Let's all agree I won this game, okay?" Jack said before quickly catching up to Kim.

"There was no way we were going to win against him anyway," Flyzik said, tossing his money in the middle of the board.

The door opened and without checking to see who it was I called, "Forget something?"

"Uh, no, I'm back," Haylee said. I heard rustling and looked over my shoulder to see that she had another case of beer and a paper bag.

"What's in the bag?" I asked.

"Vodka that has to last all week," She said.

"That's not going to happen," Alex laughed.

"I know. What happened here?" She asked, pointing to the wet spot on the floor and game board destroyed by everyone tossing their money in.

"Taylor and Kim got into it and Taylor tossed a drink in Kim's face," I explained shortly. "So Taylor fucked off into one of the bedrooms and Kim went to shower and spent the night with Jack."

"Oh wow. Of course it happens right after I leave and ends right before I get back," She chuckled. "Which one of us is going to share a room with her?"

"You are," I stated, "Alex volunteered to stay in here while Kim goes over there."

Haylee shrugged and put the beer in the fridge.

"Dudes, what time is it?" I asked, feeling that my phone wasn't in my pocket.

"Holy titty fuck, it's almost three in the morning," Alex said.

"Think we should go to bed?"

"Not at all," He grinned.

"Well you two can stay up and regret it tomorrow, but I think I'm going to go crash," Vinny said and got up. Rian, Zack and Haylee followed suit, leaving Alex, Flyzik and I alone in the living room.

"Now what?" Flyzik asked and I looked over at him. If I wasn't taken I'd totally throw him down and do him on that couch.

Whoa. Where'd that come from? I mentally shook myself and looked away from Matt.

After a short debate we agreed to watch a movie which Flyzik got to pick. It wasn't that surprised when he put a Disney movie in. Alex and I curled up onto the couch, leaving Flyzik to sit alone on the opposite one.

All throughout the movie my eyes kept wandering over to Flyzik. Whenever he or Alex would notice I'd pretend that I was just looking around the room but my eyes would always end up back on Matt.

After the movie was over, Matt left to and Alex piggy backed me into the empty room across from Taylor and Haylee's. He let me drop on my back onto to the bed and then climb on top of me. He trailed kisses across my collarbone, nipping here and there, up my neck and along my jaw.

He hovered millimeters above my lips, pulling back whenever I left my head.

"You're such a tease," I mumbled.

"You love it," He whispered in my ear, kissing right below it. The kiss turned into nibbling and I could feel a hickey forming. He stopped and moved down a few inches and started forming another one, his warm breath tickling my neck. I ran my nails up and down his back over his shirt. The second his lips left my neck I pulled his shirt over his head and threw it across the room. He automatically went back to his love bite while I traced patterns across his smooth skin. Small red lines appeared all over his back so I stopped making random patterns and traced I love you into his skin.

"I love you too," He whispered.

I was surprised he could tell what I had traced.

After another three hickies I decided it was my turn. I rolled us over so that I was no straddling his waist looking down into his big brown eyes. He ran his hands up and down my bare legs since I had changed into a pair of his boxers before watching the movie.

For a few minutes I copied the pattern of running my nails up and down his chest then I lend down making it seem like I was going to kiss him but instead turned my head at the last second and got his jaw.

"Oh, I'm the tease?" He chuckled. I grinned and kissed his jaw again, trailing down his neck. I stopped in the crook of his neck where he wouldn't be able to hide the love bite unless he wore a scarf. I spent a while making sure the hickey would be noticeable and last. I made two more large ones close to the first. Satisfied with my label I trailed more kisses up the side of his jaw and finally to his lips. It started off slow but quickly heated up with us both fighting for dominance. I let him win, his tongue exploring my mouth. He tasted like mint from the gum he'd been chewing. My nails continued tracing his body was we made out. I could feel the goose bumps rise as I travelled over sensitive spots. I teased those sensitive spots and felt him lift his hips off the bed slightly.

"You are the biggest tease tonight," He said breathlessly, looking up at me. I smirked down at him. Without warning his sat up and flipped us over again, causing me to give a short scream before clamping a hand over my mouth. We both froze, silently waiting to see if Taylor or Haylee had woken up. I started giggling when it was safe to say they hadn't.

He cut my giggling off with another kiss, his hands wandering over my body. I knew exactly where this was going to go. I pulled away.

"What about Taylor and Haylee?"

"We'll be quiet," He smiled.

Bullshit we would, but oh well. I grinned back at him our lips crashing together in a silent answer.

"Wake up you horny little bastards," Taylor swung the door open. I slammed against the wall. I sat up, making sure the blanket covered me.

"Can I help you?" I mumbled.

"Yup. Since you took the pleasure, pun intended, in keeping me away all night with your late night activities, I decided you could wake up on time today," Taylor said in a cheesy cheerful voice.

"Oh God," I moaned.

"Uh, no, I don't want to ever hear you moan that phrase ever again," Taylor said as a disgusted look crossed her face.

I burst into laughter at her reaction but then sobered, "What time is it?"

"10:30," She grinned and then left the room.

"Close the damn door or I'll walk around naked!" I threatened. She reappeared immediately and slammed the door closed.

"Do we take the risk of going back to sleep?" Alex said, lifting his head from the pillow. He was so sexy with his messy hair and thick, deep voice.

"No, she'll pull a Kim and get ice water or something," I chuckled.

"Her and Kim are more a like then they think," He commented.

"I know," I nodded, "But if you value your life you'll never say it to either one of them."

"I'll be sure to remember that," He smiled and then sat up. He pulled me close, kissing me lightly, "Good morning, beautiful."

I grinned and felt myself blush. "Good morning."

We both got out of the bed and went on a scavenger hunt through the room for our clothes. After finding enough to be decently dressed I led the way down the short hallway to the living room and kitchen.

Taylor sat at the island in the kitchen sipping what I assumed to be coffee.

"Are we the only ones awake?" Alex asked going straight for the coffee.

"Yup," Taylor nodded. "Well no, Flyzik's is awake and showering right now."

I blocked the mental images of Flyzik showering, scolding myself for even thinking about thinking that. I played with the promise ring around my finger as a distraction until Alex handed me a cup of coffee.

"So what're we supposed to do until everyone else is awake?" I asked.

"Enjoy the peace and quiet," She answered and got up. A box of Froot Loops sat on the counter and she poured some into a bowl. She reached into a cooler that was brought up from the van and poured it over the cereal.

The room was quiet other than Taylor's chewing. It was actually really nice. If I wasn't so lazy I wouldn't mind waking up this early to have at least a few hours of quietness. We were only two days into the tour and I could tell it was going to be loud and crazy most of the time.

I heard a door open and turned around to see Flyzik exit the bathroom with nothing but a towel wrapped very low around his waist. Taylor did nothing to hide her stare but I made mine a lot more subtle since my boyfriend was standing right next to me.

Water droplets travelled down his body, being absorbed into the towel.

"Wow, I never expected Kayleigh to be awake before one in the afternoon," He grinned, running a hand through his wet hair.

"Blame Taylor," I laughed.

"Uh no, blame your loud sex last night," She retorted, finishing her cereal.

"Ohhh, someone got lucky last night," He high-fived Alex and then went over to his black duffle bag on the couch and pulled out clothes. He smiled at me as he walked by, leaving the air smelling like Axe and disappeared back into the bathroom.

"He's pretty quiet," Taylor commented.

"Eh, on a scale of Zack to Jack he's about a Rian," Alex shrugged and I laughed. Only we would use a scale of people to describe other people.

The four of us sat around the island and talked about the tour until Jack walked in without knocking.

"Whoa, is Kayleigh really awake before me?" He asked, looking surprised.

I sighed dramatically, "Is it really that surprising?"

Everyone, including Matt nodded. Seconds later Kim burst through the door.

"Holy fuck, why are you awake?" She asked me.

"Alright, I get it. I sleep in late and its weird seeing me awake before all of you." I said.

"Haylee also owes you your $20 back," Taylor said.

"I knew it!" She yelled.

"Oh my God, did you bet that Alex and I were going to do it again if we didn't go for round two in the van?" I asked.

"Of course," She grinned.

"You're lucky I love you," I warned. Anyone else I would've killed. Taylor's words about Kim being my favorite echoed in my head but I ignored them and tried to focus on something else. I found myself once again staring at Flyzik.

Maybe waking up so early wasn't the smartest choice ever.

A few hours later we were set up and ready to go at the venue and killing time. I was wandering around the venue when a girl who was a few years older than me approached me.

"Hey, you're Kayleigh White, right?" She asked.

I nodded, "That's me. How can I help you?"

"I'm Emma Tatum and I write for a small magazine called Music Now and I was wondering if you could answer a few questions for an article." She explained.

"Of course," I smiled, "Fire away."

"Awesome, so can you explain briefly how you got signed to Hopeless Records?" She pulled out a recorder and pushed play

"Yeah, we entered our school's Battle of the Bands competition last September and won, and one of the prizes was a record deal." I said.

"Oh, congratulations on that. What was the recording process like while having to balance school and a social life too?"

"I'm not going to lie, it was difficult, but it was totally worth it. All of our free time was spent in the studio. We mainly recorded on weekends and holidays but some days after school we'd go and record parts. There were a lot of sleepless nights," I chuckled.

"I can imagine. Do you think it would've been easier to wait to record until summer and then go on a fall tour?"

"Not really, no. At least with recording during school, we were still in school but if we had done it that way, we would've been missing a full semester of school, if not more."

"That makes sense. What's it like being on Fall Out Boy's reunion tour being such a small band? How have the crowds reacted so far?"

"It's a dream come true, honestly. Fall Out Boy has been one of our biggest influences as a band and to me as a song writer and singer, and we couldn't have asked for a better band to tour with. The crowds are huge and it's kinda intimidating but they've been great."

"As you just mentioned, Fall Out Boy has had a big impact on your band, what other bands or artists have influences your sound?"

"There's so many, Blink 182 of course, I don't think there's a band out there they haven't influenced in some way, uh, Mayday Parade, Paramore is another big one." I listed.

"Alright, well that's all," She said, turning off the recorder. "Thank you."

"No problem," I nodded and watched her walk away. I'm 90% sure that's not how most interviews work, but oh well. I made my way back to the group sitting backstage.

"Where'd you wonder off to?" Alex asked as I took a seat on his lap.

"I was exploring and I ran into some chick who wanted to ask a few questions about the band and such," I shrugged.

"Wait, you did an interview without us?" Taylor asked.

"If you put it that way."

"Why?" She demanded.

"Whoa, calm down. It was just an interview about recording and the tour, nothing too exciting," I said, confused at her sudden outburst.

"You could've come gotten us," She said.

"Calm your nipples," Kim spoke up. "It was one interview. It's not like Kayleigh's going to go skip around doing all the interviews alone. Plus, there probably wasn't enough time to get all four of us. You would've done the same thing."

"No, I wouldn't have. Don't assume I'm like you guys," Taylor defended herself.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" Kim asked.

"Uh, no!" I jumped off Alex's lap, getting everyone's attention, "We are not going to have you two fighting again. Calm the fuck down and stop being bitches to each other."

I was getting really sick of this and I was not going to put up with it for the next two months. Everyone lapsed into a tense silence until Josh skipped in.

"What's got you guys so bummed?" He asked.

Both Taylor and Kim opened their mouths but I cut them off, "Petty bickering."

"Girl drama?" He asked and I nodded, "In that case, I'm out of here."

He left the room as quickly as he entered. Great, now our band problems were scaring off other bands. I ran a hand through my straight hair and sighed internally. Lord, help me not to strangle my band mates and have to look for replacements.

We all stayed silent until Flyzik came to get Alex, Jack, Rian and Zack since the show was starting soon. The silence continued right up until the boys came back from playing their set.

"Have you guys even spoken a word to each other?" Rian asked trying to read through our angry but vacant expressions.

"Nope," Kim popped the 'p', annoyance clear in her voice.

"Why talk when everything I say gets thrown back at me?" Taylor said.

"Maybe if you would think before opening your huge fucking mouth—" Kim started.

"Seriously?" I asked both of them, my annoyance hitting an all-time high. They both immediately stopping and went back to being quiet.

Rian stood there, taking in the whole scene. I looked at me. "Save me," I mouthed. He grinned, shrugged then walked away.

Alright, so he's no help, now what?

"Kayleigh, you guys are on in two minutes," Flyzik informed me, flashing me a smile that automatically made me smile back, earning me a look from Kim that I saw out of the corner of my eye.

This tour keeps getting more and more eventful and it was only the second show.


	6. Chapter 6

Tour is supposed to be a fun time, right? Full of partying, sleeping late, playing amazing shows and having the best time of your life, right?

Wrong.

So very fucking wrong.

In the past three days I've wanted to rip my hair out multiple times. Between Kim and Taylor's childish bickering, Haylee's cluelessness to everything going on around her, Jack and Alex's constant drinking and partying and Matt's flirting and teasing I was ready to jump on the next plane back home.

I sat in the back corner of the van away from everyone else who was gathered at the front while Haylee drove a good 20 km over the speed limit. We were headed to Buffalo as far as I knew.

The shows so far had been great, it was the only time I enjoyed being on tour. I was exhausted from late nights and early mornings and it was getting harder and harder to stay awake.

"Haylee you just missed the turn off!" Taylor yelled.

"What the fuck?" Kim said, "No she didn't. It's the next one."

"No, it was exit 235 which we just passed."

"She can still take 237 and just circle around."

"But that will take half an hour longer," Taylor argued.

I sighed and closed my eye. Lord, if they do not stop bickering I will tie them together and leave them on the side of the road.

I tossed down the notebook I was trying to write a song in and looked at the front of the van, "It's really fucking hard to write a damn song with your guys' constant fighting."

"It's what happens when you put Kim in charge of navigating." Taylor snickered.

"Dude, she's been in charge of navigating since you got us lost leaving Milwaukee so don't even start." I said in a tone that left no room for her to give another smart ass comment.

I heard Kim laugh quietly again and the arguing started again. I made an annoyed sound. "Haylee stop the fucking vehicle."

She obeyed my impolite demand and I heard All Time Low's van pull behind us. I grabbed my notebook, cell phone and a pillow and threw the van door open none too gently.

"Where are you going?" Taylor asked as I got out of the van. Kim popped her head out of the passenger window.

"Until you two can get your fucking shit together and get along for more than two fucking seconds, I refuse to travel in the same vehicle as you," I told them as Alex and Jack got out of their van. I turned and walked over to them. "I'm traveling with you guys for now."

Without another word to Kim or Taylor I climbed into the van taking a seat next to Rian.

"What was that all about?" He asked as Alex got in beside me and Jack took the passenger's side. Zack waited for Haylee to pull back onto the road and then followed behind her.

"I was ready to stab them with a drum stick so I decided it was best for their health I not stay in the van for a while." I explained, "Plus, without me in there, they'll keep fighting until they punch each other. Maybe then they'll stop."

"I'm really glad we don't have that problem," Zack commented.

"What's your secret?" I asked.

"We're just really open. We have no secrets and I'll bet anything that you're all keeping things from each other which is the reason you fight so much." He said.

"Holy shit, Zack you are a fucking genius," I said. Maybe we needed to sit down and just let everything out. The only thing wrong with that is that means I'd have to let all my secrets out and I really don't want to do that.

I felt my eye lids get heavy so I stretched out across the back seat, laying my head in Alex's lap on the pillow and my leg across Rian's. Alex immediately started to run his fingers through my hair with one hand and intertwine our fingers with his other. Him playing with my hair was so relaxing I fell asleep almost instantly.

"Wake up beautiful."

I moaned and rolled over. Right off the backseat onto the floor. Laughter broke out throughout the van as I pushed myself off the floor and back onto the seat.

"What time is it?" I asked, ignoring Jack and Rian's giggles.

"3 in the afternoon and we just got to Buffalo," Alex answered.

"Did you know you talk in your sleep?" Jack said, turning form the front seat to look at me. "Well, more like threaten people."

"You have a fucked up imagination," Matt said from the back of the van.

"Yeah, you threatened to tie someone to a cactus and then throw darts at them," Jack laughed.

"Remind me not to get on your bad side," Matt joined in on the laughing.

"I don't remember dreaming about anything like that," I told them, leaning against Alex as he put his arm around me.

"But you do look cute when you sleep," He said quietly and I smiled.

For the rest of the drive to the venue I sat there and listened to Jack's pointless chatter about what he was going to be for Halloween even though it was still four months away. It was nice to be in an atmosphere where people weren't constantly fighting.

Kids were already lined up in front of this venue too and it was only three. We pulled around back like usual and I got out of the van. Taylor got out and looked at me. I walked past her, ignoring her attempt to apologize or whatever she wanted to do and headed straight into the venue.

Fall Out Boy's crew was bust unloading so we had to wait for our turn to unload. I wandered over to a vending machine and bought a bottle of water when the idea of going to talk to the fans hit me. It was a good way to get us known and people talking about us. I went back to the van and grabbed an orange sharpie and went to the front of the venue where the lineup was. There were a good 50-60 people in line.

"Hey look! It's the lead singer of For the Record," Someone yelled out. I was shocked that someone actually recognized me.

I smiled at them, "Hey, how's it going?" I walked over to the group of four girls near the front of the line.

"I love your band so much," A small brunette said.

"Thank you so much!" I grinned, "It means a lot."

"Do you think you could sign this?" Another girl asked. I took the sheet of paper and scribbled my name onto it.

"Are you guys excited to see Fall Out Boy?" I asked to keep the conversation going as the brunette handed me a copy of the EP we released back in March.

"Holy crap, yes." They answered. "What's it like being on tour with them? Do you get to spend a lot of time with them?"

"You'd think I would but we actually don't. It's so fast paced you barely have time to breathe but I've gotten the chance to talk to them a couple times. They're such great guys." I told them.

I finished signing their stuff and went to the next group who actually knew who I was. It was actually a lot of fun talking to the fans and finding out how they found out about us. I even took a couple pictures with some of them.

After making it to the end of the line I saw Alex come around the corner and of course, more people recognized him then they did me. He waved to them and came over to me.

"Time for your sound check," He told me.

"We're already set up?" I asked. That was really fast.

"Kim and Taylor actually decided to work together."

"Finally," I rolled my eyes, "So hey, wanna carry me?"

He turned around and crouched slightly. I jumped onto his back and kissed his cheek as I wrapped my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist. He hooked his arms under my legs and bounced me up so I wasn't hanging off him. I giggled as he headed towards the back entrance.

"Are you guys dating?" Someone screamed at us.

"Yes we are," Alex yelled back, sounding so proud. He spun around in a circle and I giggled more. He carried me all the way inside the venue and to the stage where Kim, Taylor and Haylee were waiting. I slid to the ground and picked up my guitar off the stand.

Without speaking to any of them I started to intro to a random Paramore song and they follow suit. The rest of the sound check was basically that. No one spoke to each other and we only played three songs. I put my guitar back down and went to leave to stage when Taylor stopped me.

"What's your problem?" She asked. Out of the corner of my eye I saw everyone stop moving and turn their attention to us. I even saw Pete and Patrick ducking behind a speaker to hear this.

"I don't have a problem." I started but she didn't let me finish.

"Then why'd you leave the van earlier?" She demanded.

"If you would let me finish," I said in a slightly bitchy tone. "I don't have the problem. You and Kim do and until you decided to sort out whatever the fuck it is that had you two acting like you're five, I will be staying in All Time Low's van."

"But we stopped arguing long enough to set up." She tried.

"Oooh, one time for about twenty minutes. Do you really think that's going to make up for the past five days of your constant bickering? Hell, you've been fighting non-stop since fucking October and I am so fucking sick of it."

And without another word, I turned away from her and left the stage. Anger pumped through me as I paced back and forth in the dressing room. A soft knock at the door stopped me from making an indent in the floor from going back and forth. I yanked open the door.

"What do you—" I started until I realized it wasn't someone I was pissed at, "Oh, hey Matt."

"Hey, I was just wondering if you were okay," He gave a shy smile.

"Would you believe me if I said I'm fine?"

"Not at all," He shook his head. I sighed and opened the door just enough so he could slip by. Our bodies brushed together as he entered the room and my heart picked up.

He took a seat on the leather couch that was placed against the wall and I followed, making sure not to sit too close.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked.

"There's not really much to talk about," I shrugged. "Everyone already knows what's going on."

"But how is it affecting you?"

"I don't know. It's stressful to say the least. I don't even get why they fight so much. It's not even over anything important, ever. It's stupid things that most people would just get over." I explained.

He abruptly reached over and took my hand in his. I kept trying to remind myself that it was just a friendly gesture.

"Maybe you need to sit them down and have them fight it out completely until they get sick of it and apologize," He suggested, looking into my eyes.

I half-heartedly smile, "You have no idea how stubborn these two can be."

"One of them will have to give in eventually. They can't fight forever."

"You never know." I sighed.

We sat in silence while had rubbed circles on the hand he had. Every part of my being screamed at me that this was wrong and I should pull away and stop this but that one slight fraction that resisted took over my body.

A knock at the door made us both jump and he dropped my hand. I got up and opened the door a crack, hoping and praying it wasn't Alex.

Thank the Lord it was Kim.

"We play in ten minutes," She said, trying to see around me. I knew that she knew there was someone in the room with me, and she knew it wasn't Alex since he probably just came off stage.

"Okay," I said dismissively but she didn't leave. "What?"

"I hope you know what you're doing," She stated and then walked away.

Well then. I had no idea what I was doing and with her abrupt exit, I take it I had no one to turn to. I got the strong feeling this was about to get really messy.

I turned back to Matt who was looking at me in a way I couldn't even describe.

"I've got to go," I told him and left the room before he could answer.

"Where'd you disappear to?" Alex asked as I joined the group of people back stage.

"I wanted to be alone for a bit," I lied. Yeah, alone with Matt.

Hey, shut up, I didn't invite him, I argued with myself. I could already feel a headache coming on. I just need to get through this 40 minute set and I can go crash in the van. I fiddled with my guitar before the lights went out and we ran onto stage to play.

"Thank you, you guys are amazing!" I told the crowd, "See ya next time."

We did one more random burst of riffs and then left the stage. I was hot, sweaty and ready to collapse. I put my guitar in its case and set it near the loading dock. I then ventured over to Alex.

"Hey babe, where's the keys to your van?" I asked.

"I think Flyzik has them," He said, "Why?"

"Because I still refuse to sleeping in the same damn van as them and I feel like I'm about to drop," I explained.

"Oh, yeah, by all means, go crash in our van for tonight. I'll be out there in a bit kay?" He pulled me into a comforting hug and kissed me quickly before turning back to his conversation with Zack.

I looked around until I spotted Matt over by the doors.

"Hey, do you have the keys to All Time Low's van?" I asked him, not bothering to start a conversation. It would only lead to distractions.

"Why?"

"I need them."

"Are you travelling with us tonight?" He asked.

"Yup," I popped the p.

I saw the devilish look in his eye appear before he put on a poker face. "Ah, well, I can't give you the keys, but I can walk you there."

I didn't really have a choice to agree. I followed him out to the van, wondering why he bounced between shy and bold all the time. It was giving me whiplash, just like when Alex bounced between jackass and sweetheart before we got back together.

"Are you feeling better?" He asked outside of the van. The cooler air hit me and I felt like I could breathe for the first time in days.

"Kinda, I just need some sleep with a comfy pillow," I smiled. I hoped and prayed he wouldn't comment about it, but he did.

"I know someone who would make a great pillow," He grinned.

"Mickey Mouse?" I joked.

He laughed, "No."

He took a step closer, looking down at me since of course he was taller than me. I could smell the peppermint on his breath from the gum he was chewing.

Oh Lordy, what do I do.

"I-I-I have a boyfriend," I mumbled.

"Mmm, yes, but are you sure he's the right one for you?" Matt asked, looking at me with piercing eyes.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuckity. Fuck.

All I could do was mumbled and nodded.

"Do I make you nervous, Kayleigh?" He asked.

"N-no."

Really? Why did you stutter then, idiot? I scolded myself. All Matt did was smirk.

"Alright then, I'll let you be for now. But just think about what's said when you're not around. Drunken words are sober thoughts and I'm always around when Alex is drunk."

I stood in a stunned silence while he unlocked the door to the van, smirked at me and then disappeared into the venue.

What the fuck just happened? I didn't know what to think about the events that had happened today. I shook myself out of my shock and crawled into the van. I shoved bags and junk out of the way, curling up on the floor with Alex's blanket and my pillow.


	7. Chapter 7

I woke up curled next to Alex and felt 100 times better than when I had fallen asleep. That good feeling dissolved instantly when I saw Matt staring at me from the back seat. He averted his eyes after a split second of eye contact.

I rolled over and faced Alex, burying my face in his neck trying to disappear from Matt's sight and the world completely.

Even in his sleep he instinctively threw an arm around me and pulled my closer.

This is where I belong. This is where I belong. This is where I belong. I belong with Alex, not Matt, not anyone else in this world.

Then why was I having second thoughts and dreams about kissing Matt like I had last night?

Was there anywhere on this damn tour I could be to get some peace and quiet away from all the drama my life seems to never be rid of for long?

I laid there with Alex listening to Jack talk loudly like always until my body started to cramp from the way we were laying. I untangled our bodies, Alex snorting softly and then rolling over to cuddle Jack's duffle bag. I really hoped the underwear hanging out of it were clean.

The first thing I noticed was that we were still parked behind the venue.

"Uh, why haven't we left the city?" I asked.

"Because we're catching a flight to Arizona tonight," Matt informed me.

"Oh," I said.

"I thought you knew all the dates?"

"No, Kim does. She has them in her phone," I explained running my hand through my messy hair. "Does this mean I have to go back to my van?"

"Nope, you just have to go get your stuff from the van," Rian said.

"Good, because I bet you anything they fought at least twice in the past two hours," I said.

"Anything?" Matt smirked.

"They fought after you left to come to the van actually," Zack said.

I ignored Matt and looked at Zack, "Lordy. About what?"

"Whose fault it was you weren't talking to them," Rian chuckled.

"Oh my fuck," I sighed.

"Hey, aren't you guys supposed to be doing some last minute recording in Flagstaff on the two days off?" Matt asked.

"Unfortunately," I grumbled, "I hope they don't expect me to do anything other than lay down the vocal track and then sit there in silence."

"How many songs do you have left to record?" Rian asked.

"Uh, two or three, and we have to finish Taking Over Me since I lost my voice that week and we didn't have time to finish."

"So you're going to be in there for at least half the day," Jack stated and then laughed at the hopeless expression I made.

How terrible was it that I didn't even want to be in the same van as my band mates let alone a recording studio for four to six hours. We really needed to sort this out.

I sighed and leaned against the wall, pulling my knees to my chest. That's when I realized how badly I needed to shower.

"What time are we getting to Flagstaff?" I asked.

"Our flight leaves at six so we need to head out right away and we should get there and to the hotel by midnight," Matt answered.

I sighed again. Looks like I'll be pulling a 13 year old prepubescent boy and drowning myself in axe or some other body spray. Clean clothes might be a good idea too. I pushed myself off the wall and climbed out of the van, walking over to mine.

I pulled open the door and grabbed my bags, slamming it shut before any of them registered that it was me.

I walked a little ways away from the van and dropped the bag. I rummaged through it, pulling out clean sweats and a tank top. I took a quick look around to see that there was no one watching and pulled off my shirt.

I heard whistles and turned to see Alex leaning against the van watching me. He whistled again as Jack stuck his head out the window, "Damn your girlfriend is shameless, dude."

All Alex could do was grin as I finished changing. I went through the other bag, grabbing a brush and running it through my hair and then throwing into a messy bun. I pulled out a bottle of perfume and sprayed it all over my body along with apply deodorant. I sniffed myself. I guess that'll do until I can shower. I felt my self-esteem skin like an anchor.

I put everything back in my bags and opened the door to the van. This time Taylor was ready.

"Kayleigh wait—" She started. I closed the door, not bothering to let her finish.

I went over to Alex and he pulled me into his body.

"You look beautiful," He said before kissing me. I felt better about myself instantly. We got back into the van and Rian took over driving. Alex and Jack took the backseat while Matt, Zack and I were stuffed in the back with everything else.

"You guys have so much junk," I said, pushing it all to one side.

"It's not junk if it's useful," Jack stated.

"And is all of this useful?"

"Nope," He shook his head.

"Exactly," I giggled.

I ignored Matt's watchful eye on me the entire drive to the airport. His words about drunken words and sober thoughts echoed around in my head.

We arrived at the airport and went through the hectic-ness of airports and finally got to board the plane on time. Guess who I got to sit by?

Matt.

I kept my sigh to myself as I took the seat next to him. I glanced across the plane to see Alex sitting beside a gorgeous blonde in a mini skirt with full makeup. My self-esteem plummeted again, along with the good mood I had just barely conjured up while waiting to board.

"What did you mean last night?" I finally asked Matt during take-off, mostly to calm my nerves. I hated flying.

"About what?" He grinned.

"Drunken words and sober thoughts and Alex."

"What makes you think I'm going to tell you?" He raised an eyebrow.

"You brought it up so now you have to."

"What do I get out of it?" He asked in a flirty tone.

Alright, Flyzik, I'll play your game. I matched his flirty tone, "What do you want?"

"You," He said bluntly.

Whoa. Okay. That was a shock. I didn't let him see through my poker face.

"How do you want me?" I asked, never breaking the eye contact we had.

"Anyway I can have you."

I leaned in close in his ear, breathing down his neck. I could see Goosebumps appear on his skin, "Sorry darling, I don't play that way. You've got to earn it."

His breathing became uneven and I pulled back and smirked at him. "But you can start with what you meant."

Before he knew what he was doing, he spilled his guts to me, "Alex has said on multiple occasions that he wishes he was single. Don't think he doesn't see the fangirls and band sluts that lurk around the show."

Hurt and anger flooded my body.

"But don't be mad," Matt continued, "He's a teenage guy. If he didn't notice them, I'd suspect he was gay or blind."

"Yeah but still, to notice them is one thing, to want to be single so he can bang them is different," I stated.

I looked over to see Alex and the blonde laughing and talking.

"Don't take this the wrong way, but I think you deserve better."

I turned my attention back to Matt. "But, he loves me."

"Are you trying to convince me, or yourself?"

I sighed and leaned my head against the back of the seat. Fuck my life. I was quiet for the rest of the flight there, ignoring Matt's attempts to talk to me.

How did things go from so awesome to so terrible in less than a week?

Against my better judgement I rode with All Time Low to the hotel. I even let Alex put his arm around me but I didn't snuggle into him like I usually would, or play with his hands. I just sat there like a brick wall.

"Everything alright?" He asked as we got out of the van and went into the hotel lobby. I nodded and faked a yawn, trying to give a hint that I was tired. After checking in we piled into the elevator and up to our floor. Unfortunately for me there was only one room per band so I had to make the decision between my argumentive band and boyfriend who didn't want to be my boyfriend anymore.

I choose the latter, dropping my bag on the floor next to Alex's. Without a single word to anyone, I entered one of the bedrooms, closing the door behind me and threw myself onto the bed.

Alex came in an hour or so later. Loud laughter and yelling penetrated the blissful silence I had slipped into. He closed the door and the noise was cut off instantly. Thank God for sound proof rooms.

"Hey, are you okay?" He asked again crawling into the bed with me. I reluctantly rolled over to look at him. He placed his arms by my side, hovering above me. His hair hung into his dark eyes as a smile played on his lips.

"I'm fine," I said quietly.

"Are you sure?" He sounded genuinely concerned. I nodded, lacking the effort it took to actually talk. "Good, because I love you and I don't want you to be upset or stressed out about anything."

He lowered himself and kissed me softly, tenderly. My hands slid up from his forearms and rested on his biceps. We stayed like that until the door flew open.

"YEAH ALEX, GET SOME," A half-naked Jack yelled. He had his shirt wrapped around his head and a box in his hand. If it had been anyone else, I would have been confused, but since it was Jack, it was normal.

Jack ran down the hall laughing as Alex stood up and closed the door, shedding his shirt so he was just in sweat pants. My favorite look on him. He resumed kissing me and all thoughts and doubts about him wanting someone else disappeared.

The peace of secure thoughts only lasted so long. Shortly after Alex had fallen asleep I laid there wondering if maybe he was lying to not only me, but himself about loving me. Maybe he was only with me because everyone expected us to be together. Was he really happy?

I guess only Alex really knew the answer to that question, and maybe Jack. The fear that Alex might not be happy with my overwhelmed me and my heart started to race. I honestly couldn't imagine life not with Alex. He was my rock, the person who was there for me no matter what, even if he was the problem.

If I wasn't with Alex who would I be with? Matt? The idea of being with Matt wasn't completely revolting. He was hot, of course, and seemed to be pretty nice, other than the constant hitting on me. He was blunt and knew what he wanted and he had made it clear that it was me. But how could he have fallen for me in less than a week? It had taken Alex and I a good seven years to fall for each other and finally be together.

By the time I had fallen asleep my head was spinning with questions no one could answer.

I ignored all people trying to tell me to get out of bed until Kim stormed into the room and ripped the blankets off.

"I don't give a fly fuck if you're pissed at me and Taylor, we have an album to finish and our recording session starts in an hour. Get your ass up and get ready." She said and then left the room. Under any other circumstances I would have flipped her off and went back to sleep, but since this concerned our careers, I obeyed her demand and stumbled into the shower.

The hot water wasn't enough to wash away the thoughts that still clung to me. My bummed out mood worsened when Alex told me him and Jack were going to explore the city while we sat in a hot studio all afternoon. A city where it was hot and girls walked around in short shorts and tiny shirts.

I didn't bother with makeup or doing my hair. What was the point? There was no way I could even compete with most of these girls.

My mood sunk even more when Taylor announced loudly that she and Matt were going out to dinner after the session.

I silently followed Kim and Haylee out of the room while Taylor made last minute details with Flyzik. I could tell Kim wanted to ask a flood of questions, but held her tongue knowing that I wouldn't answer her.

I took the keys from Haylee and got in the driver's side. Kim took passenger's side and Taylor and Haylee took the back. I was counting down the seconds until they stared fights as I pulled out of the parking lot and sped towards the studio. Not a single person made a comment about my speeding.

No one said a word period. Haylee glanced around, probably wondering why no one was talking, Taylor and Kim both glared out the windows and I kept myself focused on the road.

We got to the studio and made our way into the recording room. The silence was finally broken by me.

"We'll start with finishing Taking Over Me and then vocal tracks for Mean." I stated, leaving no room for anyone to argue or suggest something else. Our producer whose name I didn't bother to learn set everything up and I entered the small sound proof room.

I channeled all of my anger and frustrations into singing and sung the best I had in the studio. I belted out the chorus and then looked over at the producer who flipped a switch.

"That was great Kayleigh, but we weren't recording."

"Fuck," I yelled and rolled my eyes. That was like a once in a life time thing. I waited for the go ahead signal that we were now recording and started singing again.

Okay, maybe it wasn't a once in a life time thing. I nailed every note, pitch and tone.

After laying down the vocal track, Kim went over to a different room and sat behind her drum set. She did the same thing I did and took her frustrations out on her music. I couldn't help but grin at the faces she made as she slammed her drum sticks against the drums.

Somewhere near the end of the session Alex and Jack showed up. I had mixed feels about Alex being here and ignored the feeling of wishing it was Matt.

We all gathered around the sound board thing and someone pushed a button. The finished product of Taking Over Me flooded the room. Everyone listened to it silently, nodding.

"Wow," Alex said when the song ended, "You guys should get angry at each other more often. This is amazing."

Jack nodding in agreement, "That was by far your best song recorded."

"Thanks," I mumbled. So we had an amazing sounding song, but at what expense? Our band was slowly falling apart.

"I think the drums got slightly weak at the end of the first verse," Taylor commented and my anger, along with Kim's, Jack's and Alex's flared up. Did she really just do that?

Kim raised an eyebrow and narrowed her eyes, "Really? And what the fuck do you know about drumming?"

I cut in, "Nothing, so she doesn't have the right to say anything. If anyone had thought it was weak, she would've rerecorded it."

Taylor opened her mouth but Alex cut her off again, "I think it's time to record the harmonies and back vocals."

I sighed, not wanting to be any closer to them than I was now. I followed Alex and Jack into the recording area since apparently they were helping. We gathered in a small circle around the microphone and got ready to sing when Jack stepped out of the circle.

"Shit, I forgot something," He said and went back to the sound room. A few seconds later he called, "Alex! I need you."

Alex made a weird facial expression and left, closing the door behind him. I rolled my eyes slightly and started singing when the green light came on.

We barely got through the first set of harmonies when Kim stopped. "Taylor, you're singing too high. You sound like a fucking balloon."

"At least I don't look like one," She snapped back pathetically.

I swear my eyes were going to get stuck in the back of my head from the amount of times I roll them.

"What the hell? If you were going to call me fat, just straight up say it. Don't try to be witty because you aren't." Kim snickered.

"I'm so fucking done," Taylor yelled at her and turned around, going to leave. She reefed on the door but it didn't open.

"Can't open doors much?" Kim sneered.

"It's not me you bitch." She pulled again, "It's not opening."

I sighed, taking off the head phones and going over to the door. I pulled on it and jiggled the doorknob.

"It's actually not her," I said, looking at Alex through the glass, "It's fucking locked."


	8. Chapter 8

I glared at Alex through the glass, knowing this was his idea. He smirked back at me and shrugged. I went over and banged on the glass until the flipped the switch so we could hear him.

"Unlock the fucking door," I demanded.

He and Jack both shook their head, "Not happening babe. Not until you guys work out your issues. We're going for lunch so you have plenty of time."

He flipped the switch again, leaving us locked in the sound proof room and the three of them left the studio.

"Your boyfriend is an asshole," Taylor muttered.

"This coming from someone who's been single for two years," I snapped back.

"No," Haylee yelled before we could respond. Everyone looked at her. "I am so fucking sick and tired of you two fighting and Kayleigh always having to stop it. There's a good fucking reason she stopped talking to you guys but you didn't see it because you're too busy trying to come up with bitchy things to say to each other. We are one argument from someone deciding they have better things to do than argue and leaving the band. And where's that going to leave us? We will be fucked if any one of us leaves this band. I'm glad Alex locked us in here. Now you guys can finally work out what's really going on."

We all just stared at her until Kim cut the silence, "I'm not saying a thing until Taylor apologizes."

"Fuck that, I have nothing to apologize for." She shook her head.

"Uh, you can start with throwing the drink in my face."

"I'm not sorry for doing something you deserved."

I sighed quietly and slid down the wall until I was sitting. We were going to be here for a while.

For the next while Kim and Taylor argued about who should apologize first. I came to the conclusion that if the band thing didn't work out, Kim was going to law school. I zoned out for most of their fighting because it was all just useless. I swear they were just yelling for the sake of being heard. Alex and Jack checked back twice to see if we had sorted things out, leaving every time while shaking their heads. Everyone was loosing hope.

"I really don't get it," Haylee interrupted. "You guys used to be so close and never fight. What happened?"

"It's not my fault I was abruptly replaced," Taylor blurted, and then covered her mouth.

My head snapped up. Finally, we were getting somewhere. But what?

"What are you talking about?" Kim asked, "I never replaced you."

"Excuse the fuck out of you, but yes you fucking did. Ever since you decided that Kayleigh was a part of the group you've completely forgotten I existed." Taylor yelled.

That was an over exaggeration to say the least.

"I haven't forgotten you existed," Kim said and hesitated. I knew she was trying not to follow up with a smart ass comment. She did the smart thing and just didn't say anything after that.

"Sure as hell feels like it," Taylor said in a quieter tone. "All you ever do is pay attention to Kayleigh. Everything is always about Kayleigh."

I tried really hard not to take offence to Taylor's confession but with every word it got harder and harder.

"She basically runs your life. If Kayleigh's not happy, you aren't happy. If Kayleigh's upset everyone has to drop what they're doing and fix it so that Kayleigh is happy. I know that Alex is supposed to be wrapped around Kayleigh's finger like a bitch, but I didn't think everyone else had to be too. I've put up with this for months and months and I'm getting so fucking sick of it. Why do you think I left the band the first time?"

"Excuse you, I'm sitting right fucking here," I snapped.

She looked down at me, her eyes reflecting resentment for me, but it was like she was trying to fight it. She didn't want to hate me. But of course, her defense won.

"I know, you should actually hear this because I'm pretty sure everyone else is thinking it too," She said.

"Uh, speak for yourself," Haylee spoke up. "I don't think Kayleigh is really what you're trying to make her out to be. I think it's you who is the attention whore who just isn't getting any of the attention. You're jealous of Kayleigh because she has the boyfriend, the friends who are willing to help her whenever she needs it. You want to be in the spotlight and you're mad because it's not all about you."

I could have stood up an applauded Haylee if I wanted to start another argument. Taylor was at a loss for words and Kim just looked smug. Now it was time for damage control and compromises.

"Alright look, I'm not saying I'm completely innocent for being an attention whore but it's not like I asked for it." I started, all three of them looking at me. "I didn't ask be able to sing, or to have a boyfriend and I sure as hell didn't asked for everyone to bow down to me, not that they are. I'll be the first to say it, I'm sorry. I'm sorry you feel like everything revolves around me, okay? Now what I think we need is to compromise, but first we need to let everything out, just like when Z was after us. We need to have no secrets and we need to keep it like that from here on out."

There was a brief silence while they thought it over. If they didn't agree we were for sure doomed and could kiss our careers goodbye before they even began.

"Fine," Kim said, "but we also need to agree to talk it out, not yell it out or none of us will have voices."

This began a long series of confessions. Some were small, and some were huge but we kept to the agreement to talk it out. When it came time to me, I hesitated.

"I'm having doubts," I started and then paused.

"About?" Kim pushed.

"Mine and Alex's relationship," I said.

"Why, you guys are so perfect," Haylee said.

"I don't know. Matt told me that he says he wishes he was single and band sluts." I said, not making much sense.

"Ah, I see what this is," Kim nodded. "You're worried he wants to be single so he can have fun while on the road."

I nodded, pulling my knees to my chest.

"Do you actually think Alex would do that though?" Taylor asked.

"He's male and human," Was all I said and sighed. Talking about it definitely wasn't helping.

"Is that all?" Haylee asked.

"Other than I considered leaving Kin and Taylor tied to each other in the middle of nowhere, yes."

They laughed which lightened the serious mood slightly. It was then Taylor's turn to confess. "I think I'm into Matt."

Oh Lordy.

"Go for it," Kim encouraged, "He's single as far as I know."

I felt my heart sink. I didn't bother trying to remind myself that I already had a boyfriend. I stayed relatively quiet through the rest of the confessions. I had nothing else to say. If I had brought up my slight interest in Matt, Taylor would go ape shit since I already took Alex from her, or at least, that's how she probably sees it. We finally got everything out and we were ready move on from this. I hope.

I stood up to see that the studio was still empty. I pulled out my phone and called Alex.

"Are you guys done?" He asked.

"Yes, let me out I have to pee and I'm starving." I said then hung up. The door instantly opened to the studio and Alex came over to the door and unlocked it. I rushed to the door and stepped out. I didn't realized how hot it had been in the recording room until the cool air hit me.

"Did you guys work things out?" Jack asked.

I nodded and stole his water.

"Good, you guys were in there for a good four hours. We started to think you guys had killed each other." Alex chuckled putting his arm around me. He smelt like Axe which reminded me of Matt.

"We almost did," Taylor laughed. We left the studio and went back to the hotel where Taylor left right away with Matt. He didn't look too thrilled which made me happy on the inside. I was getting really good at ignoring my conscience too. If I could keep this up, maybe I could get away with everything I was going to do.

The rest of our time in Flagstaff was unusually quiet and uneventful. Kim and Taylor had actually stopped fighting and even went to see a movie so they could work on their friendship. I laid around the hotel room like a lump, not talking or eating much. I didn't even have a valid reason to be so slumpish, I just wanted to.

The last night we were there everyone had gone out to dinner expect for me. I stayed locked up in the hotel room in my pajamas and a blanket. I was surprised to see Matt enter the room 15 minutes after everyone had left.

"What did you forget?" I asked, looking up from my phone. I momentarily paused my brick breaker game that had kept me occupied for the past two days.

"I didn't want you to be lonely," He grinned sitting next to me on the couch.

I shifted slightly, "Aw that's sweet of you."

I could feel my nerves spike up at his close proximity.

Jesus Christ, get yourself together. You play for a crowd of 2,000+ people almost every night but you can barely handle sitting beside a guy. A guy who isn't your boyfriend and have no right to be nervous over?

Oh, well there's my conscience coming back.

I somehow controlled myself while we made small talk.

"How was your date with Taylor?" I asked him.

"It wasn't a date, but it was alright. She's quite the chatter box though," He chuckled.

I laughed, knowing that one of Taylor's worst habits was talking too much when she was nervous.

Over the course of two hours we got past the small talk and by the end we were talking and laughing like we had known each other for years. He was so easy to talk to, it was almost weird.

As if knowing that our time was up, he leaned in and I panicked, relived that he only kissed my cheek. Just as he pulled back the door opened and Kim strut in with everything else following her.

"Am I interrupting something?" She asked just loud enough for us to hear.

I shook my head, wide eyed while Matt couldn't look her in the eye. And just like that she knew. She knew everything I didn't tell them in the studio and I knew the second we got time apart from everyone else, she was going to demand answers.

I looked over her shoulder hoping and praying that no one else had noticed. Thankfully Alex and Jack had gone to their own room. Kim stared Matt down until he got the hint.

"I'll see ya later, Kay," He mumbled and left the room.

Kim gave me a look and told me she'd talk to me about this later and went to the room she shared with Haylee. I flopped into a laying position on the couch, hoping and praying that Kim somehow forgets to bring it up, but I knew that was next to impossible. I ended up falling asleep on the couch instead of making it to the bedroom.

The upside to falling asleep in the couch was I didn't have to share a bed with Taylor, who liked to kick in her sleep. The downside was the morning sun woke me up at 6. I didn't even bother trying to go back to sleep, instead I kicked off the blanket and trudged into the kitchen to make coffee.

For a good hour I sat in silence, sipping my coffee and staring out the window. The sunrise was beautiful and I wish Matt was here to watch it with me. Fuck. I mean Alex. Alex is my boyfriend; Alex is the one I want to share this beautiful sunrise with.

I took a deep breath and jumped when I heard the door open. I spun around to see Matt enter.

"Oh wow, you're awake," He smiled. "I didn't think you'd be up for another five or six hours."

"Neither did I," I grinned back. "Coffee?"

"That would be great."

I poured him a cup and handed it to him as he took a seat at the island in front of me. "What brings you to my room so early?"

"I couldn't sleep and since you got the room facing the sunrise I was hoping to be able to sneak in and watch it, but it looks like I'm a bit too late. Oh well, I've found something better to watch." He looked at me and I felt my cheeks heat up.

Oh God Kayleigh, get yourself together, it wasn't even that great of a compliment.

In a matter of minutes we were right back into our deep conversation just like the previous night. And just like the previous night, it was interrupted by Kim.

"I thought I heard voices somewhere. I just thought they were in my head," She said, going straight for coffee. "Why are you guys up so early."

"I feel asleep on the couch and the damn sun woke me up," I said.

"Mm, what about you?" She raised an eyebrow at Matt.

"I couldn't sleep and thought it'd be nice to watch the sunrise." He shrugged.

Kim nodded once, "Well then. I'm going to shower since we're heading to Phoenix today."

We both watched her leave to the kitchen and waited until we heard the water running in the bathroom to speak again.

"I don't think she likes me much," Matt half smiled.

I shook my head, "Nah, she's like that to everyone. You'll get used to it."

We continued talking about Kim and the way she acts until the door opened again and Alex entered.

"Does everyone have a key to our room or something?" I asked no one in particular.

"No, you guys just don't lock the door," Alex said, "which you should really start doing. Don't want something to happen to you guys at night."

He wrapped his arms around my waist and spun me around, planting a firm kiss on my lips and then my forehead, "Good morning beautiful."

I half smiled at him, "Good morning."

I turned back around and looked at Matt who didn't bother hiding his look of jealousy. I immediately felt guilty and didn't even bother giving myself shit for it. What was the point? These thoughts and feelings weren't going away so I just had to live with them.

I don't know if Alex caught Matt's jealous stare. I assumed his didn't because he would've had a slight smirk.

Maybe that's why he was with me, because it made Matt jealous. Did Alex know Matt was into me? Was Matt even into me? Yeah he said he wanted me on the plane, but we were just kidding around, I think. I was, I'm not too sure about Matt.

Ugh, too many thoughts too early in the day.

"So are you ready for Phoenix?" Matt asked to break the silence we lapsed into.

"Hell yes," Alex said high fiving Matt for what reason I didn't know. It must be a guy thing.

"We should actually get everyone up and leave soon," Matt said.

This started a long process of waking people up multiple times because they kept going back to sleep. It took a good three hours for everyone to get up, shower and get into the vans. Marianas Trench and Fall Out Boy had apparently left earlier because both buses were going by the time we pulled out.

Taylor and Haylee both went back to sleep in the van as soon as we hit the highway. I was surprised Kim didn't pester me with questions about Matt.

"He was in there with you, wasn't he?" She asked. Oh, I spoke too soon.

"Who?" I played dumb.

"Matt. Don't play dense with me. What happened?"

"We just talked," I sighed, "that's all we've ever done."

"Are you going to throw away everything you have with Alex for someone you barely know?" She asked bluntly.

"What exactly do I have with Alex right now? We barely have any time to do anything alone anymore, and when we do, he'd rather party or go check out girls."

"So you're just going through a rough patch. Oh well. You've survived worse."

All I could do was shrug. I didn't know what I was doing or what to say to her. The rest of the drive to Phoenix was quiet, both Kim and I wondering shit this city was going to throw at us.


	9. Chapter 9

After rushing through set up and sound check I stepped outside to breathe for a minute – something I didn't get to do often.

Plus, it was a great way to avoid Kim and Jack who had gotten into a fight. And I don't just mean a small fight where they don't talk to each other because they're annoying. I mean like screaming, yelling, doors slamming and Kim shedding a few tears. I didn't ask what it was about, knowing that it would only make Kim feel worse about whatever it was.

I crouched down by the buses and took several deep breaths. I froze on the spot when I heard giggling and whispering.

"Do you think he'd be over here?" A girl asked.

"I don't know, the buses and vans are here so he might be," Someone answered her. Band sluts? I rose from my crouch and peered around the bus. Two girls were shyly glancing around the area, obviously looking for someone. I crossed my arms and leaned against the bus waiting for them to turn around. When they did I could've sworn they almost jumped out of their skin.

"Oh my God, you scared me!" One of them said, clutching her heart.

"Are you two supposed to be back here?" I asked.

"Uh, we don't actually know." They answered. I took the time to give them a once over. The one girl who was answering had stunning blue eyes and dark wavy hair. She looked about 16 but mature for her age. In one word she was pretty. Her friend was slightly shorter and blonde and seemed to be stunned.

"Is something wrong with your friend?" I asked.

"Oh my God," The blond one squealed slightly, "You're, you're Kayleigh White!"

"Yes, I am," I chuckled. These girls were harmless and most likely not band sluts.

"I can't believe I'm meeting you. What are you doing out here? How's tour? What's it like being on tour with Fall Out Boy? And All Time Low? And Jack! Oh my God, can you find Jack?" She babbled and I laughed.

"Slow down there and breathe. I can only keep up with so much." She stopped babbling and took a few seconds to collect herself. "Alright, so let's start with names."

"I'm Meghan," The pretty one said, "And this is my friend Crystal."

"Great to meet you both," I nodded. "Now what can I do for ya since you seemed to be looking for someone?"

"Do you think, if it's not too much trouble of course, you could find Jack and bring him out to us?" Meghan asked hopefully.

"I think I can," I smiled. "Stay here and if anyone asks you're my special guests tonight and I'm getting your passes okay?"

They nodded and I re-entered the venue. All Time Low was just walking off stage as I got there. I grabbed Jack by the sweaty collar.

"Come with me, I need a favor," I told him.

He shrugged, "As long as I don't have to see Kim its fine."

I didn't bother asking and lead him outside. The second Meghan and Crystal saw Jack I could've sworn one of them was going to faint. I tuned out their excited chatter with Jack until Kim was brought up.

"Is it true that you're dating Kim from For the Record and Kayleigh is dating Alex, and Haylee is dating Zack?" Meghan asked in a slightly jealous tone towards Kim.

"Nope," Jack shook his head. "As of today I am newly single."

I snapped my head towards him fast enough to crack most of the bones in my neck, "What? You guys broke up?"

All three of them looked at me. Jack nodded this time. "Yes we did and don't bother asking if we're getting back together because we aren't."

I caught the glimmer of hope in Meghan's eye and Crystal looked at me hopefully, "Did you and Alex break up too?"

"No," I made a face, "We're still dating, darling."

"Are you engaged?" Meghan asked looking at the ring on my hand.

"No, it's a promise ring that will one day turn into an engagement ring so don't get your hopes up," I half smiled as Crystal frowned at me.

"Jesus Christ Kayleigh," Kim yelled coming through the door. "If I have to come find you before one more show I will hand cuff you to the stage. We have a minute to be on stage."

I waved at Meghan and Crystal before following Kim inside to play our set.

After the not so great show in Flagstaff, we definitely redeemed ourselves tonight. It was one of the best shows we've played.

Kim and I immediately went outside to cool off. I was surprised to see Meghan standing out there without her friend.

"Hey, what're you still doing here?" I asked.

She shrugged, "Crystal ditched me and I didn't really have anything better to do."

"Who's this?" Kim asked.

"Meghan. She's a big fan of us and J- All Time Low," I caught myself but Kim probably already heard my hesitation. She chose to ignore it and just nod.

"So I'm going to make a bold move here and hope to God you don't think I'm a freak or anything," Meghan started, "but can I come on tour with you guys?"

I was taken aback by her request. Most fans want an autograph or picture, but to come on tour with us? That was new. Kim and I exchanged glances.

"Why?" I asked.

"Because ever since I was little I've wanted to tour – to see new places and meet new people. I love both of your bands and music is my life and since I can't make my own music I was hoping to have second best and be able to tour with an already existing band," She explained slightly incoherently but I got what she was getting at.

"Do we even have enough room for her?" Kim asked.

"I think so. Alex and them have Vinny and Matt traveling with them and they seem to be doing fine."

Kim scoffed at the mention of All Time Low. I was dying to know what happened but that was for a different time.

"We'd have to see what Taylor and Haylee have to say. Not to mention finding something for her to do during shows." Kim listed. "How old are you anyway, kid?"

"16," Meghan said happily.

"Not too young."

The door behind us swung open and Taylor, Haylee, Matt, Alex and Jack walked out laughing.

"Oh hey, it's Meghan!" Jack said, sounding genuinely happy to see her. If her smile could get any bigger, I swear.

Alex put an arm around my shoulder, "Who's this?"

"My new friend Meghan," Jack grinned, tossing an arm casually around her too.

"She wants to come on tour with us." Kim added.

"It depends," Taylor said, wedging her way between me and Kim, "Can you party hard?"

Meghan nodded.

"Can you put up with all ten of us?"

Another nod.

"Can you do the Macarena?" Jack asked. She laughed and nodded again. "That's it! She's in."

"Ah, too bad it's not entirely your decision to make," I laughed.

"But what can she do that's actually useful?" Kim asked.

"I'm sure Vinny could use some help on merch," I suggested. "She can also help set up and take down. Nothing too hard of course, but enough to pull her weight."

We all thought it over for a minute.

"Sounds good to me," Haylee answered.

"I don't care," Taylor shrugged then left the group, climbing into the van.

"Welcome to the crew kid," I smiled. She squealed in delight and Jack hugged her.

"I knew they were going to say yes the whole time," He declared.

"Mhmm," I nodded, "I'm sure you did Jack."

I felt Alex lace his fingers with mine and I turned around. He kissed me softly before Matt's voice interrupted us.

"We should really start loading so we can head to Santa Fe," Matt said.

"You got your stuff kid?" I asked. She nodded and picked up the bag that had been sitting at her feet. I was too caught up in everything to notice it earlier.

Alex let me go and we started to load. Both Fall Out Boy and Marianas Trench left without us again. I got the feeling that they were trying to avoid us and our drama we dragged along.

Somehow I ended up inside the venue alone with Matt doing the once over to make sure we had everything. He walked close enough to me that our hands brushed occasionally.

"So how do you feel about the tag along?" He asked.

"Hey, if I can help someone's dreams come true then I'm okay with it," I shrugged.

"That's what I like about you; you're always so open to anything to help someone," He smiled at me, "Among many other things that would take forever to list."

I blushed at his compliment. He was so cute.

"You have pretty eyes," I blurted before I could stop myself. His cheeks turned pink and he smiled. We fell into a comfortable silence and kept walking through the venue. Abruptly Matt stopped walking, grabbed my wrist and pulled me into one of the best hugs I've ever gotten. I didn't ask why, I just hugged him back. We stood like that until we heard footsteps. We jumped apart and tried to seem normal.

"What's taking you guys so long?" Alex asked appearing from around the corner. "You've been got for like twenty minutes. Let's go."

Alex gave Matt a weird look before turning around and leading the way back outside. Matt tossed Alex the keys as I got into the van. Haylee started the van and pulled out with Kim in shot gun. Taylor was already asleep across the back seat and Meghan sat alone in the very back. I crawled over the seat and sprawled across the bags and blankets. It was strangely comfortable.

"Tired?" Meghan asked quietly.

"Don't bother being quiet, all of us could sleep through a rock concert so you can talk normally," I chuckled. "And yes, I'm so tired I could sleep for a week and still be tired."

"What makes your job so tiring?" She asked.

"It's mostly stress about things that have nothing to do with my job but at the same time, almost every night we're giving it our all on that stage, plus setting up and taking down plus flying and driving – it just tires you out. But in all honestly, I wouldn't trade it for the world. It's amazing to play music for fans every night."

"How do the crowds react?" She asked.

"They've actually gotten more into it since the beginning of tour. I guess more people have looked us up since they found out were touring with FOB," I answered and then yawned.

She just nodded, knowing that I was going to fall asleep any second. I shifted so that the corner of whatever it was I was laying on wasn't digging into my rib cage and drifted off into dreams filled with Matt.

"Wake up fuckers," Kim yelled. I sighed deeply and rolled over – right onto the person next to me. I glanced down to see Meghan looking bewildered and confused. I rolled off her and sat up, my head spinning for no reason.

"Alright, which one of you fuckers drugged me?" I asked, the spinning in my head almost making me sick. I climbed to the front of the van and took the empty shot gun seat.

"Matt," Kim muttered. For some reason I was the only one who caught on. I hoped to God Taylor hadn't heard Kim's comment. I peered over the back of the seat to see that she was asleep and had headphones in.

"Are we in Santa Fe yet?" I asked.

"We've got like an hour," She said. "We'd get there faster if whoever is driving found they're fucking gas pedal."

"Obviously it's not Jack or Alex," I chuckled then sobered, remembering last night. "Hey, what happened between you two?"

"I don't even know. We've been bickering every time we've be alone about stupid things and then last night he was trying to con someone into buying more alcohol and I made a smart ass comment about him and partying and we started fighting about how all he wants to do it party and I don't sometimes and I don't know what happened but I lost my temper and called him childish and a few other things and dumped him. I tried to take it back but he took everything I said to heart and stormed out." She explained.

Really, that huge break up over a few comments? But I guess if you're already bickering and have a lot of pent up anger, one small thing can set it off.

"Do you think he'll come around?" She asked.

I didn't want to feed her false hope and tell her yes after what he said last night so I just shrugged, "I don't know Jack the way you do, so I don't know."

She sighed and concentrated on the road again. I made my way back to the back of the van and flopped down again, my head still pounding and spinning.

"You lied to her," Meghan said quietly.

I shook my head, "I just didn't tell her the whole truth."

"Same thing," She said.

"I'll tell her eventually, just not while she's driving. You don't want to die do you?"

She chuckled and shook her head, "Not really. So what's the plan for Santa Fe?"

"Go there, set up, plat, get a sticker then fly to New York," I said. "I think. I might be wrong though. Kim knows all the date though.

The rest of the drive was quiet. We pulled up to the venue and started setting up. Jack was immediately by Meghan's side.

"I'll show her around and what to do, okay?" He offered. I was surprised but nodded when I saw her face light up. They disappeared and I had a feeling they weren't going to be helping set up. I hauled speakers and guitar cases into the venue until Alex grabbed my wrist and pulled me into him just like Matt had done.

He kissed me and then without warning scooped me up and carried me out of the venue while I laughed. He set me on my feet outside of the vans and resumed kissing me. He roughly but not painfully pushed me against the van, running his hands up and down my body.

I pulled back, "Eagar are we?"

"I've just missed you. We barely get any time alone," He breathed. I shrugged and the intense make out resumed. Within minutes we had slipped into the van and clothes we shedding like they were on fire.

Alex trailed kisses down my neck and collarbone. Everything was perfect despite everything going on in my life. I was on fire and nothing could ruin this moment with Alex.

He bit down on my collarbone and I moaned, "Matt."

Except for maybe that.


	10. Chapter 10

I hope and prayed to any higher being that Alex didn't hear my mix up but dread filled my stomach when he stopped kissing my neck and I felt his body tense. His head snapped up and I could see more hurt than anything in his eyes.

"What did you just say?" He asked. The hurt reflected in his eyes was overpowered by the anger in his voice.

I stuttered but couldn't form words properly.

"Have you been cheating on me with Flyzik?" He asked bluntly. His accusation stunned me out of silence.

"What? Why would you think that? Do you not recall the fit I threw when you cheat on me? What possessed you to think I'd do that to you?"

"Oh I don't know, the fact that you just said someone else's name right as we were about to have sex," He spat out sarcastically. "I cannot fuck believe you just did that. I knew something was going on between you two."

"There isn't anything between me and Matt!" I cried. I could feel hysterics starting. He has to believe me, I need him to.

"Then why did you just moan his name?" Alex asked.

I couldn't find a reason. I didn't even know why I did it, it just slipped out.

"Exactly," He said after a moment of my trying to answer. He pulled on his jeans and started to leave the van mumbling, "I can't believe you did something like that to me."

My anger flared up, "Excuse me, but I'm not the only one to blame here."

"How am I anywhere close to being guilty for you saying someone else's name?" He whirled around.

"Oh please. Maybe I wouldn't be spending so much time with Matt if you weren't constantly checking out girls left right and center." I yelled. Okay, maybe that wasn't exactly what was happening but still. "And let's not forget you wish to be single."

"Who told you that?" He asked.

"Does it even matter? But thanks for letting me know it's true."

By the time we were both stand outside of the van. We both had only jeans on and I had my bra on.

"What does that even have to do with this?" He asked.

"Everything!" I yelled. "How am I supposed to feel knowing that you want to be single just to be able to have sex with band sluts? Am I not good enough for you?"

It was his turn to stuttered and stumble, "That's not the reason."

"Then please do proceed to tell me." I didn't wait for an answer, "At least with Mat I feel like I'm good enough for him."

That made him even angrier. "Fine, if you think Matt's so perfect then go fucking date him. I'm done with you."

My jaw dropped. That wasn't supposed to happen. Instead of showing the fact that he just ripped my heart into shreds and without thinking I pulled the ring off my finger and grabbed onto his hand as he turned away.

"What—" He started but stopped when I placed the ring in his hand. I could've sworn I heard his heart shatter.

I turned away quickly as the tears finally poured down my cheeks. I grabbed my shirt out of the van and put it on as I walked into the venue. The first person I ran into was Meghan.

"Are you okay?" She asked.

I shook my head. Why lie? It felt like my world had just ended. She grabbed my hand and pulled me over to Kim and Haylee.

"Kayleigh!" Haylee gasped, "What's wrong?"

"Al-al-al-al," I stuttered and cried harder. "B-b-b-b-broke," I stopped. I couldn't get it out. I couldn't admit that it was over.

Comprehension of what I was trying to say crossed all of their faces and was quickly replaced with complete shock. Kim pulled me into a hug while Meghan rubbed my back. No one asked why.

"Let's go somewhere, okay?" Kim said. I nodded, trying to wipe away the tears that wouldn't stop falling.

Why are you so upset? My conscience teased me. Isn't this what you wanted? Now you can have Matt. The thought made my cry harder as I blindly followed Kim. I knew we were passing by people and they were staring and trying to ask questions. Kim led us to the empty dressing room and closed the door. I sunk to the floor immediately and started sobbing harder than I ever had.

Alex's POV

My heart stopped as Kayleigh placed the promise ring in my hand. Both the promise I made and my heart were now broken.

I regret the words the second they came from my mouth but it was too late to take them back. I didn't expect her to give back the ring. What was I going to do now? I had just carelessly thrown away the most important thing in my life. Nothing had meaning anymore if I didn't have Kayleigh to share it with.

It was getting hard to breathe thinking about what I would do without her. I leaned numbly against the van, starting at the ground. A familiar pair of red Nikes appeared in my line of vision.

"Bro, are you crying?" Jack asked. I felt my face. It was wet with tears.

"Apparently," I mumbled.

"What's wrong?"

I opened my mouth but instead a surge of tears ran down my face. Why was I crying? I was the one who broke up with her because she wanted Flyzik.

Because you love her, you idiot.

But she called his name out, I argued with myself. I blocked out all other thoughts and focused on Jack.

"You're crying, and Kayleigh's literally having a meltdown. I'm going to go ahead and say you guys broke up?"

I nodded silently, sniffing.

"It can't be that bad, man. You'll be back together in no time." He tried.

I shook my head and held up the ring I had been clinging to. He choked on the water he was taking a drink of.

"Whoa. Okay, I take that back. It's bad. What the hell happened?" He asked.

I recapped everything from her calling out Matt's name to her giving the ring back. Every word hurt to say, like they were on fire, burning my throat on tongue. I was stupid for ending it over something so simple.

Jack did little to comfort me. I mean, he tried, but it was one of those things words don't help. I wiped my face, clearing away all emotion before following him into the venue to play.

Kayleigh's POV

By some miracle I managed to spit out most of the story between sobs. Thank God they were patient with me or someone would've hit me.

After telling them what happened I stay on the floor crying until Matt knocked on the door.

"Unless someone's dead or the building is on fire I don't care," Kim yelled.

The door opened and Matt came in, "Where on the scale of importance do you playing a show in five minutes sit?" He asked then saw me, "Kayleigh, what's wrong?"

Kim shook her head then looked at me, "I know this is asking a fuckload from you, but do you think you can play the show?"

I shakily stood up and nodded, "I think so."

"Will your voice even make it through the show?" Haylee asked, noticing the hoarseness to it.

I coughed and cleared my throat until I sounded almost normal. "Give me ten minutes."

Matt gave me a comforting look before leaving the room. Haylee and Meghan left to go do stuff while Kim went to get her makeup bag. It took all my control not to start crying again. I really didn't want to play the show but I didn't want to let the fans down.

Kim came back and it took me a few minutes to reapply the eyeliner and mascara that my tears washed away. I also added some blush to even out my redness and ran a brush through my hair just because. I looked decent, I guess. Kim handed me a black tank top and grey vest that I changed into and we left the dressing room.

"Wow Kayleigh," Meghan said as we made it to the stage, "It doesn't even look like you've been crying."

"You look pretty," Matt said.

I forced a smiled and took my guitar. Taylor joined us seconds later. "What's wrong?"

"Not now," I mumbled before we went on stage.

I guess the crowd sensed something was off tonight and decided that the best way to react was to go crazy. It made me feel better that the crowd was more into it than usual but I still had to blink tears away during almost every song. Every lyric, every melody reminded me of Alex somehow. Whether it was the song was based loosely on him or he was there while I wrote the song, they all connected back to Alex.

We finished the set and I almost ran off stage. I would have got straight to the van to cry but when I saw Alex, Jack and Meghan standing by the door talking and laughing I turned and went to find a quiet spot by myself. The fact that Alex was having a good time like nothing was wrong cut so deep. I found a place far enough away I wouldn't be found but close enough I could hear when we were leaving. I slid down the wall and started to cry again.

I missed him already and it had only been a few hours. I couldn't imagine how I was going to make it without him. I looked down at my hand, a think pale line where my ring used to be. More tears poured down my cheeks.

"Are you okay?"

I looked up to see Matt stand in front of me, looking really worried. I shook my head and sniffed loudly and unattractively.

"What happened?" He asked, sitting next to me.

"Alex d-d-d-dumped me," I managed.

"Why?"

I shook my head again. I couldn't tell him that he was indirectly the reason my heart had just been ripped out of my chest and handed back to me after being stomped on. I was glad he didn't ask again. Instead he put an arm around me and pulled me close to him. Every part of me screamed to push him away but I didn't. I sniffled again and tried to stop shaking from crying.

We stayed like that for a while until I had calmed down and only a few tears trailed down my face. I felt so disgusting being all sweaty from the show on top of crying.

Matt shifted his head and looked into my eyes. "You are beautiful."

It was like he had read my mind and knew exactly what I needed to hear. It didn't have the same effect on me as when Alex said it to me though.

I noticed Matt's face get closer to mine but didn't realize what was happening until our lips connected. He tasted different. I craved the taste of Alex – always minty no matter what with a hint of sweetness.

I pulled back abruptly, finally listening to my screaming conscience. "I can't," I mumbled.

"I understand. I can wait for you," He said.

"Can I be alone?" I asked. He nodded and got up but not before kissing the side of my head. I swallowed my guilt before it could swallow me and finally pushed myself off the ground. Thankfully the group by the door was gone. I decided to go pee before we left so I turned and headed towards the bathrooms. I passed by a closet where I heard something fall off the shelf and other movements. Curiosity got the best of me and I yanked open the door without hesitation.

Jack jumped, knocking another item off the shelf while Meghan rebuttoned her shirt, both of them blushing.

"Uh, opps?" I said.

"Don't know how to knock?" Jack tried to joke.

"I didn't know you had to knock on a janitor's closet," I answered.

It didn't take a genius to figure out that they were making out.

"Don't tell Kim" Meghan half asked half pleaded.

I shrugged, "Didn't see a thing."

The both grinned and Jack closed the door, but then popped his head out, "Knock when we have to leave, until then don't disturb us."

I nodded and continued to the bathroom. It never once occurred to me that I was now keeping a slightly huge secret from the person I considered to be my best friend. Yes, Kim and Jack may not be dating but I knew she loved him more than anything and any other person would have told their best friend that they caught her newly ex-boyfriend making out with someone else in a closet, but hey, I'm not perfect. I just wish I would've known how deep the hole I was digging myself into was going to get.

I did my thing in the bathroom and then checked to see if we were leaving with Vinny. He was the only one who wasn't involved in anything.

"Uh, in about five minutes I guess, we're just trying to find Jack, he seems to have disappeared again," He chuckled.

I went and knocked on the door until Jack opened it. Both of their hair was a mess and Jack was shirtless.

"Time to go," I said and then walked away. I was surprised I had gone this long without crying again. I silently climbed into the back of the van and wrapped myself in a blanket. It was my turn to drive but Kim had decided I wasn't in the proper state of mind and told Taylor to drive. A few minutes later Meghan climbed into the back of the van with Kim and I and Taylor pulled out without waiting for All Time Low.

I lay curled into a ball next to Kim. The tear trickled down my face again while she rubbed circles on my back to try to calm me down, and plus the blanket was soft and she would've done it anyway.

I begged my body to let me sleep and forget about everything that had happened but it didn't listen until hours later, well after Kim and Meghan had fallen asleep.


	11. Chapter 11

When I woke up we were in the parking lot of the airport. I was groggy and confused and for a good three minutes I didn't know what was going on. Then, like a tidal wave everything hit me again. The crushing loneliness and unbearable sadness overwhelmed me.

I pushed myself off the floor of the van and looked around. I was alone for some reason. I took this chance to quickly half ass dress myself and put my hair in a messy pony tail.

Fuck makeup, I have no one to impress anymore. I opened the door to the van and was blinded by sunlight. My eyes watered as I looked around. All the buses and vans were here but the people living in them weren't. I sat on the edge of the van with the door open but hiding from the sunlight. I had just noticed that the van smelt like ass so now was a great time to air it out.

I grabbed my phone and found I had nine texts. I hoped that one was from Alex but they were from everyone but him so I didn't read them.

I waited a good half an hour before I heard footsteps and laughing. All 18 of them came around the corner looking happier than anyone had in days.

"Oh hey, you're awake," Meghan commented.

"Where'd you guys go?" I asked. I noticed Alex's smiled had disappeared the second he saw me and I spoke. Another wave of sadness washed over me.

"It's called technology. Learn to use it and read your texts," Kim said. "I texted you tell you we were going to get some decent food before the flight."

"Then what were the other 8 texts about?" I asked.

She shrugged while Matt answered, "Probably people looking for you yesterday when you disappeared before the show. You don't check your phone often do you?"

I shook my head, "Why would I?"

Matt just shrugged and smiled at me. I could feel the anger radiating off Alex without even having to look at him. Living with someone for almost 8 months and being friends for years makes it easy to feel their emotions. I glanced at Alex who met me with an almost glare. He tried to hide the fact that he was fighting with himself on the inside but I could still see through him. He'd have to do a lot better than that. I didn't even bother to hide my pain from him.

Meghan coughed in the awkward silence, breaking the tension between Alex and me.

"Ready to go to New York?" Jack asked Meghan and Kim sent her a sharp look while she wasn't looking.

I pretended like I didn't see a thing and grabbed my half packed bag, throwing it over my shoulder and pushed through the group, heading to the main entrance of the airport. Everyone followed suit except for Matt and Vinny who took the vans to wherever they needed to be to be shipped to New York.

We went through customs and security and all that fun stuff. Somehow I ended up beside Alex more than once. It was awkward to say the least and he'd go out of his way to move away from me. Everything he did was another cut deeper. He really did hate me.

I dragged my bag and dumped it in the area to be loaded onto the plane then followed behind Haylee as we boarded. I took my seat and observed and very angry Kim glaring at the back of Meghan's head while her and Jack sat side by side laughing.

Matt took the seat next to me and grinned, "Looks like we're seat buddies again."

"Twice in a row? I don't think that's a coincidence," I raised an eyebrow.

"So maybe I switched tickets with Jack who originally switched with Alex," He confessed.

Of course Alex switched with Jack, somehow knowing I would end up beside him.

"So are you ready to explain what happened?"

"Alex hasn't told you and everyone else for that matter?"

"Nope, I think Jack is the only one who knows what really happened but other than that, he won't tell a single thing."

I was genuinely surprised by Alex's sealed lips. You would've thought he would have gone around calling me a slut and whore for what I did.

"But he did say that nothing in this world would make him forgive you," Matt finished.

My heart sunk so far I'm pretty sure it fell out and then anger took over. Fine, he wants to do that, I will too. "You wanna know what really happened? He dumped me because I moaned your name while we were making out."

Surprise and a slight smugness crossed Matt's features.

"What made you do something like that?"

"I was thinking of you, of course," I lied. He didn't cross my mind once that time, which was why my mess up was so surprising.

Matt leaned in and kissed me without warning. I could feel people looking at us and as he pulled back I glanced over to see Alex shaking his head as he sat down next to Taylor, who was full on glaring at me. If she didn't have enough reasons to hate me already this made the list. I gave her a helpless look and she just turned away.

Matt held my hand the rest of the flight and off of the plane, earning me quite a few looks from everyone we were with. After we left the airport Alex stormed off to get the vans with Taylor, neither of them even looking at me.

"What's up with them?" She asked, dragging me away from the group.

"Uh, well they both witnessed Matt kiss me," I told her, "And now they both hate me more."

She sighed, "Are you guys a thing or?"

"I don't know. I don't even think I'm into him that much anymore. I'm so confused and hurt and sick of this."

"I know how you feel, trust me. I don't know how I'm dealing with out jack but I am and you need to deal with being without Alex."

The way she said it made it seem like Alex and I weren't ever going to get back together. I knew deep down that is was probably true but that doesn't mean I wanted to hear it.

I felt tears in my eye well up and she hugged me as Alex and Taylor brought the vans over. I went to get in the van but Taylor locked the door.

"The hell?" I asked.

"Remember that thing you did when you wouldn't travel with Kim and me because we were fighting? Yeah well, I don't want to travel with you and I'm not leaving so you are." She stated.

My jaw dropped. "Excuse the fuck out of you."

"Uh no, excuse the fuck out of you, you bitch. I'm sorry I ever forgave you." She said.

"Taylor, don't be like that," Haylee tried.

"That's kinda a bitch move," Meghan added in my defence.

"If you think what I'm going is bitchy, just wait until you all find out what Kayleigh has done to me," Taylor said sending me another cold hearted glare.

I stood there silently looking around as everyone loaded into the vans and Taylor tossed my bags at my feet. I knew I wasn't welcome in All Time Low's vans I wasn't even going to try. My only thought was to hop onto a plane and go home. That was the only solution that made any sense. I opened my mouth to admit that I had finally had enough, that this was the last straw, that I quit when Pete came up to me.

"We have an extra bunk if you want it," He offered, looking concerned.

"Thank you," I managed to spit out. I picked up my bags and followed him on to Fall Out Boy's bus. He led me to the back where six bunks were.

"You can have the middle one, between Joe and I," He said. "Make yourself at home."

I nodded and put my stuff in the cupboard next to it and then climbed into the bunk, closing the curtain behind me. The second I was cut off from the four men in the front lounge the tears poured down my face as I silently cried, wishing I had never met Matt.

Alex's POV

I can't believe she did that. I cannot fucking believe she was kissing Matt on the plane. We have barely been broken up for twenty four hours and she's already moved on to him.

I tried to be angry at her but the hurt outweighed it. I knew deep down that it was my fault—I had driven her right to him when I ended it.

I sat on the opposite side of the van from Matt, trying to not to jump across the backseat and start throwing punches. This was his entire fault. If it hadn't been for him, I could've been holding the most amazing girl in my arms right now, but no, instead I'm stuck with Jack elbowing me in the ribs every time he twitched in his sleep.

My emotions jumped between anger, hurt and guilt for what I agreed to do. I knew it was a bad idea to agree to Taylor's game but you make stupid decisions when you're angry and I was beyond pissed. It had happened while we were getting the vans.

"Hey," she nudged me as we walked.

"Hmm?"

"I know you saw what Kay did on the plane, and that wasn't right," She stated, "I know you're hurt and I know how to get back at her."

"I don't want to get back at her," I admitted. I was pissed, but not that pissed.

"Please," she scoffed, "Why wouldn't you? She stomped on your heart and then gave it back to you and then proceeded to basically rub it in your face on the plane."

She made sense. I nodded, "What do you have in mind?"

"We could pretend to date, or really date, it's up to you," She explained. "That would drive Kayleigh mad knowing that you moved on almost as quickly as she did."

Whoa, since when was Taylor such a bitch? But the thought of making Kayleigh extremely jealous did give me a slightly good feeling.

"What did she ever do to you though?" I asked, dying to know what had set Taylor off.

"The fact that she has gone after every guy that I've been interested in," Taylor stated.

Ah, of course, the jealousy idea came from the fact that Taylor was jealous of Kayleigh. While we waited for the vans Taylor and I discussed details.

I didn't feel bad for making the deal then, but now as I laid with Jack spooning me due to lack of room, I was starting to regret it. I couldn't even get out of it without having Taylor blow up at me, and I'll be the first to admit, she's kinda scary when she's mad, maybe even worse than Kim. It was like striking a deal with the devil.

It blew my mind that she also kicked Kay out of the van. I didn't even know Taylor had that kinda power. And Kim didn't even stop her. But if anything, I was glad Pete offered her the bunk. I could tell by the look on her face that she was so close to just throwing the towel in and going home. I knew how much she looked up to Pete and the rest of FOB so maybe being with them and having a comfortable place to sleep would be good for her and maybe Kim thought that too.

"Mm, Meghan," Jack mumbled in my ear. If it was anyone else, I would have been creeped out, but it was Jack. I was surprised that he had moved on from Kim so quickly but him and Meghan had seemed to be getting along pretty well and their mouths knew each other very well. Whatever makes him happy, I guess.

I rolled over and inhaled to the smell of Kayleigh from when she used my pillow. More regret flooded me as I tried to block it out and go to sleep but thoughts of her kept creeping in and kept me up long into the night.

Kayleigh's POV

Somewhere between crying and wishing I was dead I fell asleep. I crawled out of the bunk with great difficulties and stumbled my way to the front lounge.

Pete and Patrick sat at the tiny table and Joe and Andy were nowhere to be found.

"What time is it?" I asked.

"7:30 in the morning," Pete answered.

"Ew, why are you awake so early?"

"Jetlag," Patrick answered in a duh tone.

I nodded feeling kind of stupid. I took a seat on the couch across from the table where they sat and pulled my knees to my chest. I felt like crying again even though I just spent a good four hours doing it last night.

"So what brings you to our bus?" Patrick asked.

"My band mates hate me," I answered bluntly.

"I highly doubt that," Patrick said kindly.

Like word vomit, as Cady Heron would describe it, the story of my life slowly falling apart starting from what happened in the studio fell from my mouth. Pete and Patrick listened attentively and didn't interrupt once. I was surprised that they didn't tell me to stop; especially once I had started crying again as I told them about Alex's cruel dumping.

After I finished and a few moment of silence while they took the story in Pete got up and hugged me. It made me feel so much better.

"I don't know how you've managed to keep it together through all of this," Pete said, "but it's amazing that you've kept going."

"But I want to give up so badly." I admitted.

"I know," He nodded, "We all do at one point, but your band needs you. You may not believe it but they do."

I sighed. They really didn't. Haylee's vocals were strong enough to take my place and it's not like I played guitar because it was needed, I just did it for something to do on stage.

Letting it all out to Pete and Patrick made it feel like there wasn't a huge anchor holding me down anymore. Now I was just sad and it felt like it would never go away.

I stayed on the bus for most of the day while everyone did their thing to get ready for the show. Meghan had come looking for me around 4.

"Hey, how ya feeling?" She asked.

I just shrugged, "Better in some places, worse in others."

"I know you play soon but Kim sent me to go find a sticker for the van and I wanted to know if you would come with me?"

I nodded, "Why not? I have nothing better to do."

I threw some shorts and a shirt on and left the bus not caring about hair or makeup.

"Do you know New York well?" She asked as we walked down the bust streets.

I shook my head, "Not at all but I know my dad lives here now."

She gave me an odd look so I recited to her the story of how my mother and how Dad left me too.

"I'm so sorry," She gasped.

"It's fine," I shrugged, "I have, well had, amazing friends to take care of me so it wasn't all that bad. I don't know what I'm going to do when tours over and school starts again."

"You'll figure something out," She tried.

We entered a small convenient store. Meghan went to look for the sticker and I grabbed chocolate and chips for myself. I hadn't eaten since Alex dumped me and of course, why would I eat something healthy? I paid for everything on debit and we left the store.

"So, what's up with you and Jack?" I asked her.

She immediately blushed, "Nothing."

"Bullshit," I half smiled. "Are you guys a thing or getting there or?"

"I don't know," She admitted. "We've made out more times than I can count but he hasn't brought a relationship up."

"Eh, give it time. He and Kim just recently broke up too. But also, be careful, you're playing with fire. If Kim finds out, she won't hesitate to kill you." I joked slightly.

"I'm not afraid of her," Meghan declared. "But I do think that's why he's holding back. "

"Good, you'll need that courage." I chuckled for the first time in days.

We got back to the venue and I went into the bus to get ready. I noticed I had a missed text from my dad.

To: Kayleigh  
>From: Dad<br>you're in NY? Let's meet tomorrow. It's important.

He should thank his lucky stars we had a day off tomorrow. I replied with nothing but a K and then proceeded to get ready. I shoved my feelings down and decided to show everyone that I was doing just fine on my own.

For someone who's been crying and not caring about my appearance lately, I sure can clean up well. I came out of the bathroom dressed in new skinnies I bought in Arizona and a shirt that hugged all my curves. I pulled on black leather heeled boots and ran a hand through my freshly straightened hair before leaving the bus.

Just my luck that everyone was standing outside and turned their attention to the bus as I came down the few steps. I kept my head up and walked over to Kim and Haylee while Taylor gave me a dirty look and went over to Alex and grabbed his hand. I expected some sort of disgusted reaction but instead he put his hands on her hips and pulled her closer. Jealously and anger ripped through my body and I struggled to stay in control.

"Damn, Kay, you look hot," Haylee smiled.

"Thanks," I managed through clenched teeth. They followed my line of vision to Taylor and Alex who were now laughing.

"Yeah about that," Haylee started. "We wanted to tell you but we didn't know how to.

"Tell me what?" I asked.

"I don't think now it a good time," Kim said cautiously.

"Tell me what?" I demanded.

"Taylor and Alex are sorta kinda dating now." Haylee blurted.


	12. Chapter 12

So, I don't usually title my chapters, but someone (Meghan) suggested to call this one "The Bitch Games Begin" so yeah. Enjoy (:

I was torn between going and killing Taylor and falling to the ground crying. I surprised myself when I did neither. Instead I looked over and smiled at Taylor who was grinning smugly at me then I looked at Kim.

"Why?"

"Why what?" She asked.

"Why the fuck are they dating?"

She shrugged, "I don't know, she wouldn't 'fess up but she also wouldn't shut up about it on the way here. It's a good thing you weren't in the van or we would have been digging a ditch for her body."

Another wave of anger hit me and I clenched my fists. "We might just have to tonight. Speaking of which, Daddy wants to see me tomorrow."

"Why?"

"I don't know. He didn't say but I don't even want to go."

"Then don't."

I sighed, "I probably should. It just might be important."

"I'll come with you," She volunteered.

"I'll need the support," I agreed.

"Can I come too?" Meghan asked.

I shrugged again, "I don't care."

My eyes wandered back to Taylor who had her arms around Alex's neck as he kissed her nose. They broke apart and Alex followed Rian into the venue. Taylor smirked at me again but it soon faded as I felt a pair of hands wrap around my waist. I looked over my shoulder to see Matt grinned down at me.

I sighed internally but plastered a fake smile on. If Taylor wanted to play games she was about to learn not to play them with people who could play them better. She may be able to act all innocent but she can't hide her feelings like I can.

I let Matt kiss my cheek before placing one hand on his cheek and one snaking through his hair and kissing him. I don't think he realized my complete lack of enthusiasm and passion which made this easier. I pulled away from Matt slowly, pulling on his bottom lip with my teeth before sending Taylor a bitchy smirk. She picked her jaw up off the ground and stomped away.

Let the games begin.

After the set that consisted of me avoiding Taylor's side of the stage I decided it was time to hit a club, illegally of course. Being 17 did have its downsides but being female didn't.

Kim, Meghan Haylee and I dressed up in low cut enough shirts that a security guard wouldn't even think twice about asking our ages. I lent Meghan heels and did her make up to make her look at least 19.

Pete, Joe, Patrick, Josh, Matt, Jack and Flyzik had agreed to go with us too. I didn't really want Matt there but I couldn't really tell him not to come.

So dressed up in our tighter than necessary jeans and boots that made too much noise while we walked, we headed over to the huge club within walking distance from the venue.

Of course we didn't have a problem getting in. I sent Josh straight to the bar to order us drinks.

"I can get in so much shit for this," He said.

I pulled out my American Express card, "I'll cover the entire tab."

He didn't question me after that. He returned promptly with two shots for each of us. I swallowed mine instantly then just like any place we went to, Kim and I pushed our way to the dance floor. It was just us for a while until Matt, Meghan and Jack came to join us. Meghan and Jack danced together while Kim sent menacing looks at Meghan when she wasn't looking. I pulled her out of the crowd and over to the table where three vodka shots were. I made her take two of them.

"Loosen up," I told her. "We're here to have fun."

She rolled her eyes and nodded as we went back to dancing. I unwillingly danced with Matt for a bit and somehow Kim ended up grinding on Jack who looked like he didn't mind.

Things were going perfectly fine and we were all having a blast dancing and laughing at Jack's dancing until I saw a shock of blonde hair enter. My eyes narrowed as Taylor walked across the club and joined Josh and Pete at the table with Alex right behind her.

Subtly I nudged Kim and nodded towards them. She rolled her eyes.

"Ignore her," She advised.

Like I was going to do that. As the song changed everyone switched dancing partners and Matt ended up behind me. Perfect.

He put his hands on my waist as I shook my hips to the beat, pressing myself against his body. I think the alcohol was getting to me because I was actually enjoying grinding myself again him. He wasn't bad at dancing either. One hand slowly made its way from my hip to my thigh and I didn't stop it.

The song ended and Kim brought me a strongly mixed Paralyzer. I downed it and let the warm dizzy feeling devour me.

I walked over to the table Taylor and Alex invaded. It was getting harder and harder to walk in three inch heels.

"A little drunk are we?" Josh chuckled.

"No," I giggled.

"Could've fooled me," Taylor mumbled.

"At least I didn't have to dress like an unclassy whore to get in here," I snapped noticing her short dress that should have been a shirt.

She rolled her eyes with nothing to say to me. I won that round. I reached for the shot in front of Pete but he got to it before I did.

"Mine," He said in a childish tone, grinning, "Get your own."

I sighed and walked over to the bar, forgetting the small fact that I was four years under the legal drinking age. I was glad the bar tender was male and looked like a perv. I leaned over the bar and smiled innocently at him.

"What can I get ya, sugar?" He asked, staring down my shirt.

"Three shots of vodka and three of tequila," I ordered. He poured the shots and I took two of them then carried the other four to Kim. I gave her two and we took them together. When we got back to the dance floor, Alex and Taylor were grinding to the music.

In my drunken haze I went back over to Matt and started dancing with him again. But instead of having my back to him, I faced him, bringing our head close together, teasing him with almost kisses. I knew it was driving him nuts; I could feel it and see it in his eyes.

I finally stopped teasing him and kissed him forcefully, peeking through my eyes at Alex and Taylor. Alex was giving Matt a dirty look and Taylor looked like she was going to kill someone. I was definitely winning this.

"Why don't we take this party back to the buses?" He suggested.

I nodded and signaled to Meghan and Jack that we were leaving. Matt pulled my by the hand to the door and we pushed our way out into the dark summer air. He led me to the side of the building and pinned me against the wall, picking up where we left off in the club.

After a good ten minutes of wandering hands and lip biting we heard voices coming closer. He went to step back but I pulled him in until a shadow blocked the street lights.

"Are you fucking coming?" Taylor snapped.

This time I let Matt pull away, breathless and grinning.

"Of course," I said in a sickeningly sweet voice and followed her back to the rest of the group.

We all half walked half stumbled back to the buses. Rian and Zack sat between the two buses with a case of beer and a small camcorder. I went straight for the beer and the party just got started.

"Kayleigh, get you fat ass up" Someone yelled. I lifted my head and it spun like a marry-go-round out of control so I dropped it back down. Pain shot up from the hard surface my head just collided with.

"Seriously Kayleigh," Someone else yelled. I was awake enough to notice that the voices were coming from below me. I sat up again, ignoring the spinning and looked around.

It took a good minute for me to be able to think straight. I looked around, noticing that I could see over to roof of the other bus. That's when I realized it was laying on the top of Fall Out Boy's bus.

I peered over the edge of the bus and saw Matt and Kim looking up at me.

"Uh, morning?" I chuckled.

Kim sighed but couldn't hide her grin, "Kayleigh Ann White what the hell are you doing up there?"

"Dude, if I knew I'd tell you, but I'm just as surprised as you are."

"Well get down here, you have a meeting with your father soon," Kim said.

"How?" I asked. "What time is it?"

"4 in the afternoon," Matt answered then the three of us looked at each other questioningly.

"What the fuck?"

I looked over to see Alex crawl half naked out of the van and look up at me.

"What's she doing up there?" He asked Kim.

"Who knows," Kim shrugged, "The important thing is how she's going to get down."

"Well if she got up there herself she can get down herself," Alex stated then took a seat in one of the chair that littered the space between the buses. Great now I have a hostile audience too.

The solution on how to get down really wasn't that hard, it was the fact I was terrified of heights that stopped me from doing anything.

"Times ticking away," Kim said impatiently.

"Why not just jump?" Matt suggested.

"Because poor little Miss Kayleigh is scared of heights," Alex snickered. "It's not even that high."

I ignored Alex and slowly maneuvered myself so my legs were dangling over the edge of the bus and inched my way down until I was dangling off the bus.

"Now let go," Kim told me.

I took a deep breath and loosened my grip on the edge of the bus. My head was pounding and I felt dizzier than I had when I was drunk. I let go completely and felt myself dropping but I didn't reach the ground.

Am I still drunk?

It took me a second to realize the Matt had caught me as I dropped down. I smiled up at him as he put me on the ground.

"Alright, now go shower and get ready," Kim ushered me onto the bus.

I used Fall Out Boy's small shower that lacked hot water and space. I didn't bother with straightening my hair or anything but I did make sure to wear somewhat nice clothing. Black jeans and a white button up shirt should do. I zipped up my boots that I seemed to be living in lately and came off the bus.

Kim wasn't in sight so I assumed she was still getting ready. I looked around, pretending not to notice Alex still sitting in the chair, starting at me. I didn't know what to do other than take a seat on the cooler closest to me and look busy.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Taylor leave the van and go and sit on Alex's lap. They whispered for a few minutes and the Taylor kissed him.

I don't know how or even why I kept a poker face and didn't just go knock her out, but I just sat there looking perfectly content flipping through my phone until Kim came out of the van moments later with Meghan.

"Ready?" She asked.

"Let's go," I urged her.

We started to leave the little area that was still a mess from our "party" last night but not before I heard Taylor giggled, "I love you Alex."

Don't say it. Please, don't say it.

"I love you too, Taylor," He said.

There went the last piece of my heart.

"Are you okay?" Kim asked once we were out of earshot of the new couple of the year.

"Can't really do anything about it," I said. We walked down the bust streets and I wished I could just disappear into the crowd.

"Punch her the fuck out?" Kim suggested.

"What's that going to solve?" I asked. "I don't want to talk about it. What happened last night?"

"Same thing as always," Kim shrugged, "We all got wasted, danced to no music and made out. You and Matt almost went all the way, but I thought you might want to do that sober so I puked everywhere and told Matt I needed your help. The only thing I don't get is why you were on the roof of the bus?"

"I fucking love you," I told her. I don't think I would have been able to live with myself if I had had drunken sex with Matt. "I'm kinda glad I don't remember last night."

"I'm pretty sure you wish you remembered why you ended up on the roof." Meghan chuckled. "You went on and on about how you were going to conquer your fear of heights and climbed up there and started dancing then puked everywhere then laid down and passed out I guess."

"I am a freak of nature when drunk," I laughed and entered the tall building we walked up to. I lead the way to the elevator. I impatiently tapped my heel as we went up to the top floor.

"Your dad is really relevant isn't he?" Meghan asked as we got out.

"To everyone but me," I answered walking up to the first secretary.

"Oh Kayleigh, it's so great to see you again," She smiled at me, "Go right in."

"Thanks," I smiled back and led Kim and Meghan into the next part of the office. This part had a huge lounge type waiting room and a large wooden door leading into Dad's office. I walked up to the next secretary's desk and peered down at her through narrowed eyes.

This woman who was in her late twenties with long blonde hair and fake nails was the woman who started all this bullshit. This woman was who I was expected to call "mommy." I had met her once when Dad came to finalize the sale on the house and hated her.

"Kayleigh!" She smiled at me fakely. She didn't like me much either. "You actually made it."

"Mhmm," I said shortly as she pushed a button on the phone. "Dave, your daughter's here," Then she looked back at me, "Go in."

I passed by Kim and whispered, "Annoy the fuck out of her."

Kim grinned as I went through the door into my father's office.

"It's great to see you Kayleigh," He smiled, stand up from behind the dark wooden desk.

"You too," I lied.

"How's tour been?"

"Great," I lied again.

"That's great. How about you and Alex?"

"We broke up."

"Why?" He actually seemed to care about that one.

"Questionable motives," I answered.

Dad raised an eyebrow, "Alright. Well, I'm glad things are going well although I'm not entirely happy with your credit card bills lately."

"Really? Why?"

"Kayleigh, you spent almost $400 at a bar last night. How is that even possible when you're underage?"

"Why are you tracking my credit cards?" I countered.

"How else am I supposed to keep tract of you and make sure you're okay?"

"And not spending too much of your money?"

"So maybe I'm worried about that too, but that's not the point."

"Then what is the point? Is this another one of those things Amanda suggested to you?" I spat.

At one point she tried to convince Dad that me buying a $500 amp because mine broke was going to turn me into an impulse shopper and end up spending all his money. I don't understand her reasoning but it gave me another reason to hate her.

"No, but she is worried about your spending habits too."

"Oh please, all she wants is all your money for herself, the little gold-digging whore." I yelled without thinking. Yelling made my head hurt and spin some more.

"She is not a whore!" He raised his voice. It reminded me of the scene in The Hangover.

"No, just a gold digger."

"She's not that either." He defended her.

I sighed loudly. "Whatever you say dad. If that's all you have to say then I'm leaving."

I turned to leave but he stopped me. "You didn't let me finish."

I made an annoyed sound and turned back around, "Continue then."

"Since both Amanda and I are worried about your spending habits, I've decided to cut you off." He said.

My jaw dropped. "What?"

"Amanda suggested—" He started but I cut him off.

"I don't give a flying fuck what that bitch suggested. You can't cut me off; I'm your daughter for Christ sakes. If anything you should cut her off."

"I will not stand here and have you talk badly about Amanda." He raised his voice again. "Or have you use that kind of language."

"Oh please dad, like you haven't heard me swear before, it's not the end of the world." I rolled my eyes.

His phone beeped and he pulled it out. A confused looked crossed his features then anger. "Kayleigh, what's this?"

I walked across the room and took the phone. I scrolled through the message that contained pictures of me dancing, drinking and making out with Matt.

"Uh," I mumbled.

"Is this what you do in your free time? Party underage in clubs and whore yourself out to other guys?"

"I wasn't whoring myself out!" I screeched. "I knew him!"

"For how long?" He asked.

My jaw dropped at his question. How fucking dare he?

"Who sent those to you?" I asked. I had already seen the number but I needed to hear him tell me who sent them.

"That doesn't matter. What matters is that no daughter of mine will be photographed in clubs like this."

Wait, no. He can't do what I think he's about to do. He can't yank me away from tour. No. I love being on tour. I mean, I hate it sometimes but I've worked so hard for this. My heart rate picked up and I felt dizzy and it wasn't from the hangover I was still fighting.

"I won't stand for something like that," He continued after a brief, "especially with my money being spent on your careless partying. I've decided that after everything that has happened, I no longer support your choices. I know there is no way to make you change your mind, therefore you are no longer my daughter."

"You're disowning me?" I asked.

"To put it bluntly, yes," He nodded. "As soon as you use up what's left on your American Express which is how much?"

I lied to him, "$2,000." There was no way he'd let me get away with how much was really on it.

"After you spend that and what little is left in your account, you will be removed from all my banking information and credit cards." He stated. "I'm sorry it had to be this way."

I brought my eyes from the spot on the carpet where they had been planted since he started talking about disowning me and looked him in the eye.

"I fucking hate you," I said with no regret and turned on my heel and stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind me.

Kim and Meghan jumped up from the couch with questioning looks. Amanda glanced at me with a smirk as I walked up to the desk.

"How'd it go?" She asked in a fake voice.

"Fuck you, you little gold digging skank. I hope you burn in hell," I said to her in the exact same voice. "Take your fucking suggestions about how my father should raise me and shove them in your slut hole. Thanks for ruining my life, bitch."

I walked away from the desk, leaving her jaw hanging in surprise. I stormed out of the lounge and to the elevators without stopping. Kim and Meghan didn't ask questions until we were outside. I ignored them as they followed behind me, trying to get me to stop and tell them what happened.

My anger burnt out as I got back to the buses and I stopped walking.

"What happened?" Kim asked, slightly out of breath from trying to keep up with me.

"Dad disowned me," I said and burst into tears again.


	13. Chapter 13

"What why?" Kim asked the panic clear in her voice.

As suddenly as the tears had started they stopped and I remembered why I was so angry and it boiled up again. I pushed past Kim and strut over to Taylor who was sitting on Alex. I grabbed a fistful of her hair and pulled her off him.

"Kayleigh!" Meghan shrieked, starting towards us but Kim stopped her, realizing what happened.

"What the fuck?" Alex yelled, not getting it like Kim had.

"Alex, shut up," I yelled back, then turned my attention back to Taylor. "How could you? How could you fucking do that?"

"Do what?" Alex demanded.

"What's going on?" Jack asked coming out of the van.

I push Taylor away and she stumbled back but didn't fall.

"Tell them," I urged her as she rubbed the spot on her head. "Tell them how you just fucked us over."

I took a step closer to her and she jumped back as everyone looked at her questioningly.

"Tell us what?" Meghan asked.

"I took pictures of Kayleigh at the club last night dancing and drinking and making out with Matt," Taylor blurted. "I knew she was going to see her father today so I sent them to him while she was there. But I honestly don't know how that fucked us over."

"Oh, you want to know what you just fucking did." I yelled, tears escaping my eyes again. "Dad was about to cut me off of his credit cards but still keep me linked to his bank account but thanks to you, he saw those pictures and decided to fucking disown me."

Every single person, whether they were mad at me or not, gasped in shock.

"Do you know what that means?" I asked her. Well, more like screamed at her. "Do you?"

She shook her head, wide eyed.

"That means no more money for anything. I have $4,000 on my American Express which will buy us plane tickets to California and Baltimore and $1,000 in my account but after that's gone we have nothing. Nothing. We are so fucked for money it's not even funny. And it's not even us, because guess who was paying for half of Jack and their stuff too? Me. So thank you for fucking us over to the point of no return." I yelled.

"I'm sorry," She said.

"No you fucking aren't!" I screamed. "Do you even give a shit about this band? I don't care if you don't like me. Fuck, I don't like you right now but do you fucking realize what this means for our careers? They are over."

"I'm sorry!" She yelled.

"NO YOU AREN'T" I screamed again. "What the fuck were you even thinking when you did that? That all I'd get was a slap on the wrist? No!"

"I didn't know he would disown you," She tried.

"I don't care if you did or didn't know. I can't believe you'd do that in the first place."

"Maybe if you'd stop going after every guy I've ever been interested in, then I wouldn't have done it," She yelled.

I was done yelling. It was time to settle this. "Fuck this," I said before taking another step towards her and nailing her in the cheek with my fist. I watched as she fell to the ground, clutching her face.

I probably should have stopped there, but when have I ever stopped after the first punch in a fight. I didn't let her get up; instead I dragged her back up by the hair and hit her again in the head, making sure to avoid her temple. I didn't' want her kill her yet, just knock some sense into her.

The thing about having long hair is it's really easy to grab during fights, which is what Taylor did. She grabbed onto my hair and pulled my head back, dropping me to the ground and her coming with me. My hangover slowed my down getting up but I was still faster than her. She tried to pin me down and a swift kick to the ribs with heels made her double over. My hand flew out and smacked her across the face in the same spot I punched her. I went to get up but she grabbed my leg and pulled me towards her. As I tried to shake her off she finally got a punch in, connecting with my lower jaw and lip. I spit out blood from my cheek and split lip. I curled my fist and brought it back to break her nose again when a hand caught mine.

I looked up to see Alex standing over me. I tried to pull free from him but he was a lot stronger. Instead he pulled me away from Taylor and made me stand up. I looked over to see Zack holding Taylor back by her arms, her face already bruising.

"Are you girls done?" Zack asked.

"I don't know is Taylor done being a cunt?" I asked. I rarely ever called someone that, but she deserved it.

"Are you done being a whore?" She returned.

"This coming from the bitch that started going out with the only guy I'll ever love the day after I broke up with him."

"You kissed Flyzik!"

"Correction dumb fuck, he kissed me and I pulled back. Do you actually think I'd fucking go to another guy the day after I got my heart viciously torn out and handed back to me?"

I felt Alex grip loosen for a second as I said that and I ripped my hand out of his. I started to walk away but as I passed by Taylor I stopped. She moved away slightly.

"Count your lucky stars we're on tour and don't have a replacement because I swear to fucking God you would have been gone when you started shit with Kim," I told her. "I don't think I'll ever be able to forgive you for this so the second we get back home your out. Got it? I'm done with you."

"You can't just make that decision," She started but Kim stepped forward.

"I agree with Kayleigh," She stated. "You and your fucking drama and impulsive ideas for revenge are too much. You won't ever change and I'm done with it too."

Taylor looked helplessly at Haylee who shook her head.

"You just ruined our careers and you expect you to want you to stay? I'm sorry Taylor but no."

"How can you guys do this to me?" She asked.

"Us?" I asked, raising an eyebrow. "You're the one who started everything and no amount of apologies is going to fix this. The only solution is to get rid of the problem which is you."

She stood there, mouth gaping as I turned and left the group. Slamming the door behind me I entered the bus and flopped onto the couch next to Pete.

"You just missed a shit load of drama," I sighed.

"No we didn't," He grinned. "We have windows."

"You have a great right hook," Joe complimented me.

"But did you really kick her out?" Patrick asked.

I nodded, "I didn't really have a choice. Not after she just screwed us so badly."

"How much do you have left?" Pete asked.

"About $5,000," I answered. "It seems like a lot but after plane tickets, gas and food, it's really not. Plus we were helping out the guys too so cut that in half and you have soon to be really hungry teenagers."

Pete looked thoughtful but stayed quiet along with everyone else until we started to leave. I went to my bunk and flopped down. I was exhausted mentally and physically and my lip hurt a lot.

I wasn't done being mad at Taylor but my only thought was Alex and how much I missed him. The loneliness was almost unbearable no matter how hard I tried not to think of it.

I just wanted to lie in his arms and have him tell me everything was going to be okay. Without noticing or caring that it was only 6pm I slowly drifted off hoping I'd wake up with Alex.

-x-

I woke up in Philly and without Alex. I didn't want to leave my bunk and go talk to anyone. I just wanted to lay there and cry some more, but the stronger part of me took control and made me roll out of the bunk and pad down the short hallway to the front lounge.

"Feeling better?" Pete asked as I sat across from him beside Patrick.

I shook my head, "Worse, if that's possible."

"I assume this has nothing to do with Taylor?" Patrick said.

I shook my head again, "I miss him so much."

I started to cry again and Patrick put a comforting arm around me.

"Darling, it'll be okay," He said quietly. "He'll realize what a stupid mistake he made and things will get better."

"But what if he doesn't take me back? What if he doesn't love me anymore?" I asked, tears pouring down my face.

"He'd be insane not to take you back." Pete jumped in. "And he still loves you, trust me. We can all see the way he looks at you. He just has a hurt ego which will take a while for him to get over and see what a huge mistake he made. The best thing you can do right now is stay strong."

I nodded wiping my eyes. If anyone else had been telling me this, I wouldn't have listened and thought it was complete bullshit, but since it was coming from Pete and Patrick, I believed it.

After sitting with them for a while longer I decided to go clean up my face and get dressed. I left the bus to go find Kim to talk to her about plane tickets to California but instead I found Meghan and Jack making out in the back of the van.

"You dirty children," I grinned. "Get out and get a room."

"Do you know where one is?" Jack asked.

I laughed, "The back of your van maybe?"

"Can't, Alex and Rian are sleeping."

"Go have sex on top of them." I said. "Where's Kim?"

"Uh I think she went to buy some food since we ate most of it during our party." Meghan answered.

I sighed, "Alright. Go back to your making out but don't get caught."

I closed the door and paced back and forth between the buses, at a loss at what to do. There was still a good three hours before the show started and I had nothing to do.

I stopped pacing after getting dizzy and sat down in a lawn chair. They were really useful for when we were waiting outside a venue and didn't want to sit in a hot van.

"Can I talk to you?" Taylor asked, coming out of the venue.

"I really don't have anything pleasant to say to you," I told her.

"Good, then you can listen," She said.

"I'm not listening to your pathetic apologies to try to convince me not to get rid of your sorry as when we get home."

"So you don't even care why I did it?"

"I know why you did it. You did it because you don't think and you were jealous of me. You didn't stop to think, 'hey maybe Kayleigh really didn't kiss Flyzik on the plane, maybe it was a misunderstanding,' but no, instead you decided to go and date my ex-boyfriend. Your jealousy got to you, which I don't even know why considering there's really nothing to be jealous of right now. And when you apologize you don't even mean it, you're just saying it so things can be cleared up. I regret letting you back into the band the first time. If I would've known you were going to do something so stupid and selfish I would've turned my back on you when you came crawling back at Alex's mom's party." I spewed at her.

She stayed quiet for a few moments, soaking in my babble. "I'm sorry."

"I don't care, nothing you say is going to fix this or make me forgive you," I said in a tone that left no room for arguing.

"Fine, but for the record, I'm not actually with Alex. I talked him into pretending to, to get back at you for kiss Flyzik." She said then walked away.

It didn't surprise me one bit that she talked him into it, but what surprised me was the he actually went along with it. Everything Pete and Patrick said to me earlier was forgotten as tear slid down my cheeks again. He really didn't love me anymore.

I heard a door open and I wiped my face, trying to hide the tears from whoever was there. I looked over to see Alex, shirtless and messy haired, closing the door to the van. I held my breath, praying that he didn't see me.

He turned and for a brief second we made eye contact and my heart fluttered. I knew he could see the tear stains on my face. In my head he ran over to me, picked me up and kissed me, apologizing for being so foolish.

But in reality I got a slight nod as he spun around and went into the venue leaving me staring at the spot he was standing in until Kim reappeared with a bag of food.

"What's wrong?" She asked. "Wait, never mind, that was a stupid question."

"Taylor tried apologizing," I told her.

"And?"

"I basically told her nicely to fuck off because I wasn't changing my mind and then she told me she talked Alex into pretending to date her."

"What a bitch, I can't wait until she's gone." She said as she walked over to our van and went to open the door.

I realized too late that Jack and Meghan were in the van still and didn't have time to stop her.

I watched wide eyed as she opened the door and Jack and Meghan sprung up from the floor, covering themselves.

"Oh, uh, hi Kim," Meghan laughed nervously.

"What the fuck is this?" Kim asked, eyes darting between Jack and Meghan.

"Kayleigh, you were supposed to warn us!" Jack hissed.

"How long has this been going on?" Kim demanded.

"Since I joined you guys," Meghan admitted.

Kim stood there, shaking her head, "I knew there was something about you I didn't like. Did you only ask to join us so you could fuck around with my ex?"

"Key word being ex," Jack threw in. "You can't control who I go out with."

"You guys aren't even dating though," I blurted.

"Wait, wait, wait," Kim said, turning to me, a cold fury in her eyes. "You knew about this?"

"Well, I uh," I stuttered. Fuck.

"You knew and didn't tell me? How long have you kept this from me?"

"Since I found them in a closet the same night Alex dumped me, so whenever that was," I confessed.

She clenched her fists in anger and I could see her shaking but I could also see the anger masked the pain. She was more hurt that Jack had moved on so quickly. I moved to comfort her which was a really big mistake because out of nowhere she brought her balled up fist up and it collided with my mouth.


	14. Chapter 14

I spit out blood that had welled up in my mouth. I didn't even care that she hit me; it was more of the fact that it split the other side of my mouth. Now both sides of my bottom lip were busted.

I turned to look at them. Jack and Meghan looked horrified and Kim looked sorry.

"I probably deserved that," I admitted, wiping away more blood.

"I didn't mean to make you bleed," She said.

I shrugged, "Shit happens. No teeth are missing so it's fine."

"How can you be okay with her just punching you like that?" Meghan asked.

"Probably because I would've done the same thing," I said. "Hell, I did yesterday to Taylor. We don't hold back."

"I can see that," She said, still surprised.

Kim turned back to Meghan, "I knew there was a reason you wanted to come on tour with us."

"That's not why!" Meghan said, "I swear."

"Bullshit," Kim snapped. "You're lucky Kayleigh got hit and you didn't because I swear I wouldn't have stopped at one punch. Stay the fuck away from me."

Kim turned and entered the venue leaving the three of us standing there.

"Well then," Meghan squeaked.

"It's just hot air," Jack said, kissing her head.

"Are you okay?" She asked me.

I shrugged, "I'm fine. She didn't even hit me that hard."

"But you're bleeding."

"I would be worrying about you more than me," I told her.

"I don't get why she's mad," Meghan said, "They're over."

"For the same reason I freaked out on Taylor. Kim's still in love with Jack."

Wasn't that obvious? I didn't know what to think of that whole situation. Jack was playing with a lot of fire right now but at the same time Kim needed to calm down. It was a lot of drama I didn't want to think about.

-x-

The show was loud, rowdy and just phenomenal. It was a good reminder of why we were on this tour and why we were doing what we were. Those 40 minutes on that stage let me forget all the bullshit happening in my life, and trust me, I needed the escape.

As soon as our time on stage was up I tried to disappear but since Meghan was working merch I had to help with the stage switches. After that I tried to escape again but this time Matt caught me.

"Hey, you got a minute?" He asked.

No. "Yeah, sure," I smiled and followed him to where no one could see us.

The moment we were out of site I was pinned against the wall and his lips were attacking mine.

I expected him to be telling me about how he heard I was still in love with Alex and a (large) small part of me was hoping he'd called this fling off. Apparently, I was wrong.

I let him kiss me until I got bored of him. Might as well have some fun since I was suddenly feeling adventurous.

I pulled him closer by the collar of his shirt, my other hand curling around his hair. I deepened the kiss as his put his hands on my waist.

He pressed me harder against the wall as I bit and pulled on his lip ring.

"Hey Matt can you—" Vinny appeared behind him, "Oh, you're busy never mind."

A giggle escaped my lips before Matt resumed kissing me. I didn't exactly enjoy it, but I didn't hate it. It was proof that it was nothing but lust for him. I don't know where it came from but it was out of my system and I wanted Alex back.

It made me wonder if that I would crave every new guy that walked into my life if Alex and I got back together or maybe Matt was just the exception. Too many thoughts spun around in my head and I felt almost drunk.

My head was spinning and my stomach did a flip. I pulled away from Matt.

"What-?" He started. I bent over and emptied the contents of my stomach next to us.

"Are you okay?" He asked as I spit out the rest.

I stood up, my head pounding. I felt like hurling again but managed to nod.

"Oh God, what's that smell?" I heard Kim's voice seconds before she appeared. "Oh shit, are you okay?"

"Why do people ask that at the worst time?" I asked, crouching down and putting my head between my knees. I don't know where this came from, but I suddenly felt awful. Or maybe I had felt this bad the whole time and just ignored it.

The smell of the puke almost made me puke again. I dry heaved and Kim pulled my up gently.

"You need fresh air," She said.

I found it amusing how hours ago she had punched me in the face and now she was taking care of my sick ass.

She led me past Alex, Jack and Haylee who for some reason followed us. Kim pushed the door open and I stepped outside into the slightly cooler air. I felt better for half a second before gagging and turning just in time.

"Are you okay?" Jack asked.

"Ask me that one more time, and I'll puke on you," I warned them.

By the time I was shaking had the chills and my head felt like it was going to explode.

"What's wrong?" Haylee tried.

"I don't know," I answered instead of the smartass comment that almost slipped. "One minute I'm fine and ma—then the next I'm hurling all over the venue and feel like I'm dying."

"Did you eat something?" Jack asked.

I shook my head, "I don't remember the last time I ate."

"Could that be the problem?"

"I don't think so," Kim said. "It can't be the flu if she hasn't eaten anything. Could it be from, oh I don't know, stress?"

"Her symptoms are more related to the flu though," Haylee pointed out.

"Guys, does it matter what I have or how I acquired it? All we need to focus on is me getting better," I said. It took a lot of effort to say that all.

I sunk back down to the ground, leaning against the wall, fearing that if I stayed standing up I'd pass out.

"She's right," I heard Matt say. Apparently he had come out too.

"Does anyone even know how to take care of a sick person?" I asked, dropping my head between my knees

Jack laughed, "I prefer not to be puked on."

Everyone else just stood there silently until someone spoke up, "I do, kinda."

I didn't bother looking to see who it was, I could tell by the nervous tone and voice.

Of course you do Alex, I've taken care of you so many times, you better damn well know how to.

I peeked up to see everyone looking at him.

"Then what do we do?" Haylee asked.

The fact that not a single one of them knew what to do deeply worried me.

"She'll need lots of fluids, rest and soup, but she doesn't like soup, so fruits and veggies are probably better. Give them to her in a smoothie or something but with less sugar and all that crap. It's probably not very healthy but it's the only way she'll get the vitamins she needs to get better. Sleeping on the bus probably isn't the best thing because it's shakier than a van and it'll make her puke more. Other than that, there's not much we can do." Alex said.

I call bullshit on the bus thing, but I didn't say a thing.

"What about the rest of us? What if it's contagious?" Jack asked.

"You, Rian, Zack, Flyzik and Vinny can ride in FTR's van and Kim and I will stay in our van with Kayleigh." Alex suggested.

My head spun again but not from my illness. Why was he suddenly being nice as pie now?

I heard shuffling as everyone went to move their stuff into one of the empty parts of the trailers to make more room. I took deep breaths, trying to keep the puke in my stomach.

"Here."

I looked up to see Alex dangling a water bottle in my face.

"Thanks," I squeaked, taking it from him and taking a long gulp, trying not to notice how he'd already drank from it.

Hey, don't judge me, you'd be happy too when that's the closest thing to contact from him you've gotten in five days.

The door swung open and Pete came out.

"I heard someone was sick," He said, looking down.

"That would be me," I mumbled.

"Ah, I guessed as much. You gonna be okay, kid?"

I shrugged, "I don't know, but I'll be staying in ATL's van until I'm better."

"Why?"

"So I don't get you guys sick," I said. "I don't think anyone would be too happy if I got the main band sick on their reunion tour."

"Makes sense," He nodded. "I hope you feel better soon though."

He went back inside and it made me feel better mentally that he went out of his way just to ask. There was a reason he was my hero.

I heard more shuffling as Alex walked away and Kim walk up.

"I don't get it," I told her.

"Get what?"

"Why he's being so damn nice."

"He still cares I guess," She said.

"He really shouldn't. It makes it so much harder," I sighed.

"Maybe he realizes that the source of your stress was mainly him, and now that you're sick from it, he feels responsible for you."

"I just want him back," I said quietly. "Are you and Jack ever going to get back together?"

"I don't know," She said in a quieter voice than me. "I want to so badly, but Meghan…"

We both sighed and watched the two guys that meant the world to us move things from van to van, joking and laughing. This isn't how things were supposed to be. Jack and Kim were supposed to be together forever, just like Alex and I. We were going to grow up and live together, tour together and be happy together.

Haylee and Zack were still going strong, so what went wrong with the four of us?

The obvious answer of my stupidity that nigh slapped me in the face and I put my head back down, my eyes filling with tears. I felt the same pressure in my stomach as before and turned my head, more bile spilling out.

I rinsed my mouth with the water and looked at Kim, "I'm sorry for not telling you about them."

"It's fine," She said. "I overreacted. I should've known that he would move on, I just didn't expect it to be so soon. I'm sorry for hitting you."

"It's all good man," I chuckled, "I totally would've done the same thing like I said."

We fell into silence again as Jack came over.

"I think you should go lay down," He said, noticing the puddle a few feet away.

Kim stood up and helped me to my feet and I slowly made my way to the van, a pain developing in my stomach. It just kept getting worse.

I peered into the van to see that the entire back section had been turned into huge bed. Blankets and three foam mattress things were laid down for padding and a huge fuzzy blanket on top of them with Alex lounging next to them.

My stomach did a backflip making me puke again.

"We're going to stop and get some medication for you," Jack said.

"How will that work if we don't even know what she's sick with?" Kim asked.

"Tylenol will at least help with the headache we all know she probably has," Alex cut in before either of them could start bickering.

I rinsed again and then crawled into the bed. Kim and Jack promptly walked away as Alex handed me my tinker bell pajama bottoms. Shamelessly I pulled my jeans off and the bottoms on, not bothering to change out of my tank top. I slipped under the huge blanket and gently put my head on the pillow that smelled like Alex.

"Alright, so here's your puke bucket if you need it," Alex pointed to an empty 4L ice cream container near my head. "Wake me up if you puke so we can clean it up. Water is just by your legs there and if you need anything, I'll be right here."

Without warning, he pulled off his shirt and slipped under the blanket with me, much to my surprise. I didn't know what to do so I laid there stiffly. He reached out and placed a hand on my forehead lightly, making my face tingle slightly.

"You're burning up," He mumbled. "Are you cold?"

I nodded, chuckling internally at the oxymoron of having the chills with a fever. Alex moved closer as a pain shot through my stomach and I winced, turning onto my side facing him.

"Are you okay?"

I nodded, "Just pains."

Wrapping an arm around me, he pulled me into him so we were pressed against each other. His warm, bare skin heating mine up. I missed this so much.

I started drifting off almost immediately. Right before dropping off completely, I could've sworn I felt lips against my cheek and a soft whisper, "I love you."


	15. Chapter 15

This is really boring, sorry xox

-x-

I woke up with a cold empty feeling in my stomach and next to me. I looked over to see Alex had rolled to the other side of the van.

I sat up, grabbing the bucket and tossed up the contents of my stomach, which wasn't much. Alex heard my loud vomiting and sat up. He held my hair back

"You good?" Alex asked after I finished.

"As good as someone can get while they're constantly puking," I said.

"Kim, pull over." He called to the front of the van. Kim obeyed and pulled over to the side of the highway.

He grabbed the bucket and a bottle of water before climbing over me and getting out.

"Are you okay?" She asked.

"No," I moaned and laid back down in the fetal position to try to calm the pains that started again.

"How many shows do you think we're going to have to cancel?" She asked.

"Uh, I'd love to say none, but probably at least two." I sighed. I really didn't want to cancel any, but I couldn't go on stage and end up puking all over my fans. That wouldn't be a great first impression.

Alex got back into the van and closed the door. "Alright, you can continue driving."

"Thanks for your permission," She said before pulling back onto the highway.

Alex put the bucket back where it was and then laid down next to me again, but this time didn't pull me closer, or come anywhere near me.

I tried to go back to sleep, but I felt so rejected. I knew it was too good to be true that he had forgiven me. I sighed quietly and rolled over to face the other direction of Alex. This was going to be a long night.

-x-

Thankfully I didn't wake up again during the night, but I woke up feeling gross and in a serious need of a toothbrush.

I also noticed Alex wasn't next to me anymore. I sat up and saw he was driving while Kim was probably sleeping across the back seat. I rummaged through my bag and found my toothbrush and toothpaste and then grabbed a bottle of water.

"Can we pull over?" I asked Alex. He nodded and immediately stopped the van. I assumed that since no one drove past us, we were behind everyone else.

I opened the door and the bright sunlight blinded me to the point where I thought I was a vampire for a minute.

I half blindly put the toothpaste on the brush and stuck it in my mouth, scrubbing my mouth. The taste of the toothpaste made me want to puke more, but I forced myself not to as I spit it out and rinsed with the water. I repeated this until I couldn't stand the taste any longer and my teeth felt clean.

"Feeling any better?" He asked.

"Not really," I answered, wrapping myself in the blanket after putting my toothbrush away. "I'm fucking starving but I don't want to chance food."

I laid there trying to figure out what was going on with Alex and why he was being like this. I think this was the first time in a long time I couldn't read him. He had walls higher than the Great Wall of China and no one could knock them down.

I sighed to myself, wondering if things would ever be the same.

-x-

I apparently fell back asleep because when I woke up again, we were in Trenton and already at the venue.

I jumped as the door to the van open.

"Oh, hey, you're awake," Alex smiled. "Are you feeling better?"

I shook my head, still feeling sick.

"At least you haven't puked again," He said.

"I have nothing left to puke out," I said.

He pointed to a box of sodium crackers next to me, "Try nibbling on those for now."

"Thanks," I smiled slightly. He returned it before reaching for his bag and pulling something out. He zipped it back up and looked back at me.

"Are you going to stay in here, or do you want to at least get some air?"

I slowly got out of the van, taking my blanket with me. He closed the door behind me and I followed him to the area where everyone had the lawn chairs set up between the busses. I took the free one between Meghan and Haylee.

"Are you feeling better?" Meghan asked.

"No," I answered.

"I posted that we weren't playing tonight or tomorrow," Kim told me. "I didn't say anything about the Connecticut show yet though."

"Hopefully I'll be better enough to play by then," I nodded.

We sat there and talked as people came and went from the group. I mostly just sat and ate my crackers and just listened to everyone's extremely loud talking.

I kept stealing glances at Alex when he wasn't looking at me.

Ten minutes before the show started everyone went inside, leaving me and Meghan who had the night off, outside.

"So does this mean you and Alex are back together?" She asked once everyone was gone.

"I don't know," I said. "He's being so nice and caring but we haven't actually had a full conversation yet."

"That's really weird," She said.

I nodded, "I don't even know what to do."

"You'll figure something out," She insisted. "Just give it time."

"I don't want to give it time though. I don't want to wait. I want him back now. I want a do-over for the past week so that none of this had ever happened. I miss him so fucking much," I babbled.

"Tell him that."

I gave a humourless laugh. "Not likely. He'll think I'm some desperate psycho. And plus, I don't think he'll ever forgive me."

"You won't know until you try," Meghan shrugged.

I sighed loudly and chewed on a cracker as the back door to the venue opened.

"Shouldn't you be on stage?" Meghan asked Jack.

"I forgot something," He said.

"Oh, what?" She asked.

He walked over to her and kissed her lightly, "That."

Without another word he went back inside and Meghan turned bright red.

"You two are the cutest," I said but I couldn't help feeling that that should've been Kim. I guess that came from the fact that she was my best friend.

We sat out there talking until Alex, Jack, Rian and Zack came out all sweaty and breathing heavy.

"How was it?" I asked them.

"Amazing, just like every other night," Jack answered.

"Where's Kim and them?" I asked.

"Uh, I think Kim's helping with merch and Haylee is pretending to know what she's doing to help out Matt. As for Taylor I have no clue. She disappears all the time." Alex answered.

I think I was the only one who heard the hint of resentment, disgust and jealousy in his voice when he said Matt's name, other than Jack of course.

"Are you feeling any better?" He asked.

I was getting really sick of being asked that, but from Alex it was okay. "Well I have puked up my crackers yet, so I guess so."

"That's a start," He smiled.

Jack threw him a confused look and then shrugged at me. It was like he was reading my mind and interpreting it.

Rian disappeared and reappeared with four beers. "Sorry, Kayleigh, but you're sick and I don't think you want to be puking up beer and be hung over and Meghan's underage."

"Oh, please that never stopped her before," I laughed. "And you are too, Rian."

"Pfft, I'm closer to being legal than she is," He laughed.

"I'll just get one myself," She said and got up. Jack and Alex immediately ran for the empty chair. Alex tripped Jack and got to the chair first, laughing at Jack.

"I win," He laughed obnoxiously.

Jack stuck his tongue out and plopped down on Alex's lap.

"Dude you weigh a ton," Alex joked, pushing him off.

Jack pulled up his shirt, "I am NOT fat."

"I don't know Jack, you seem to be looking a little, fluffy." I played along.

He made an offended noise, "Girl, please."

"Hey! That's my spot!" Meghan said, coming back.

"Not anymore," Alex grinned.

Jack pulled up the cooler and then pulled Meghan into his lap.

"If we had a bon fire, this would be just like camping," I said.

"Aside from the fact that we're next to a venue with 3,000 people in it," Zack said.

"Hey, don't burst my bubble," I said and threw a cracker at him. "Next time I'll puke on you."

He made a face and laughed. "Alright, note to self, don't burst Kayleigh's bubble."

"Speaking of bubbles, do we have any?"

"Bubbles?" Meghan raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah, y'know, the ones you blow?" I said then burst out laughing with everyone else. "Not like that though."

"I don't think so," She answered.

"Aw," Jack sighed, "I was getting excited."

"Someone remind Kim to get bubbles when she goes to get the sticker for here," I said, looking at the side of the van parked a few feet away.

Eleven cities later and our van was looking not as empty. I was glad I came up with the idea. It made the van seem so much more us.

I suddenly had the familiar feeling in my stomach. I stood up and walked away from the group slightly with my bucket. Crackers taste awful coming up the second time. Alex was by my side instantly holding me up so I didn't fall over.

I finished emptying my stomach and stood up. Alex took the bucket again while I sighed. This really should not be happening.

I went and sat back down with everyone and they all asked if I was okay again. I answered absent mindedly, still trying to figure out Alex. I didn't get why he was so up to helping me while I was sick, but wouldn't hold a conversation with substance for longer than ten seconds. It was going to drive me insane if I didn't find out.

-x-

The past three days have been nothing but boring. I had to sit out the New Jersey show because my stomach was killing me but I had stopped puking. I got to play the Connecticut show but under the restrictions that I couldn't jump around or do much moving just in case I started puking again, set by Kim of course.

I woke up the next morning feel a lot better. I had to run three laps around the bus to prove to Kim that I was healthy again. I don't know what that proved but she came to the conclusion that I could fully play again.

The second it went around that I was healthy again Alex stopped talking to me.

I swear I could get whiplash from his decision to start and stop talking to me.

So now I sit on a plane to California next to Jack trying to figure out what the hell just happened.

"Jack," I nudged him. He looked up from his phone.

"Yes?"

"Can you keep a secret?" I asked.

"Of course," He looked at me weirdly.

"From Alex?"

He went from looking confused to knowing what I was trying to get at, "I suppose."

"You're his best friend so he must tell you a lot, right?" I knew he told Jack everything. Jack nodded and I continued, "So do you know why he just decided to start talking to me while I was sick then went back to ignoring me?"

"To be honest, I don't even know the whole reason why he's acting like that. He won't say much about it, but I do know that he does still care about you," He answered.

The shred of hope grew slightly.

"Then why not try to fix things with me?"

Jack sighed, "We both know how stubborn he is and he doesn't think you want to fix it."

"What?" I half yelled. Everyone on the plane looked at me, including Alex. "Sorry."

Jack chuckled at my outburst.

"What makes him think I don't want to fix it?" I asked quieter.

"The fact that you went straight to Flyzik after," Jack stated.

I opened my mouth but nothing came out because I knew he was right. I screwed that one up big time. I closed my mouth and ran a hand through my hair. What do I do now that Alex thinks I don't want to be with him anymore?

I knew part of the answer was completely obvious and had to be done as soon as possible.

I stay silent for the rest of the flight. Jack stopped attempting to talk to me about it more and left me to my thoughts.

We landed in San Francisco in the late evening. I was looking forward to going to our hotel and falling asleep instantly. We stood collected our luggage and headed towards the hotel.

Once we got there I pulled out my credit card to pay but it was declined.

"I'm sorry Miss, but you've reached your maximum." The girl at the front desk told me.

My jaw dropped. I completely forgot about Daddy cutting me off.

She cut my card in half and handed it back to me. I went back to the group.

"Uh, guys, we have a problem," I said quietly.

"Hmm?" Kim asked.

"We're kinda out of money."

"Fuck!" She yelled at the same time as Jack.

"What're we going to do? We still have at least eight shows to play!" Haylee cried.

"I know," I nodded, "but I don't know what to do. I can't call Daddy or anyone at all. We're so fucked."

Everyone started panicking and worrying.

"Alright, look," Kim said. "We can either stand here and panic and stress after a long flight or we can go back to the vans, get some sleep and then figure out what to do."

We all nodded in agreement and left the hotel and the two bands separated into their own vans. Taylor took the passenger's seat so she was as far away from us as she could get. I assumed she was still mad about being kicked out. Haylee took the back seat, leaving the very back for me, Meghan and Kim and I of course had to sleep between them so Kim wouldn't strangle Meghan in her sleep.

I laid there for hours worrying about what we were going to do. We had no money and no way to get any money. I have just over $150 on my bank card. That was it. And that had to last for eight more shows. I don't think so.

The fact that we didn't have money wasn't high on my list of things to worry about though. In my mind, Alex was still number one which probably wasn't the best thing right now. The money problem would be an excuse for him to talk to me though but I still needed to start fixing things.

I fell asleep with a growing dread for tomorrow growing in my stomach.


	16. Chapter 16

"Rise and shine princess."

No. I didn't want to wake up and face the day.

"Get up."

Not happening.

"Wake the fuck up."

A shock of cold air hit me as the blanket was ripped away.

"Hey!" I yelled.

"Then get up," Kim said, throwing the blanket over me again. I sighed and sat up. "We need to think of a solution."

"What time is it?" I asked.

"Noonish. We're all going to sit down and talk about it in ten minutes." She told me then left the van.

I sighed deeply and climbed out of the van. I spent the ten minutes we had brushing my teeth and my hair so that I didn't look like a complete slob. I was the last to join the group and I took the empty seat between Kim and Alex.

"So what the fuck are we going to do?" Haylee asked breaking the silence. Everyone automatically looked at me, Kim and Alex.

"Why are you looking at me?" I asked.

"Because you were the main source of income," Haylee said.

"Yeah, and we kinda lost that when Taylor got me disowned."

Everyone turned their attention to Taylor, who was sitting slightly inside the van.

"Don't look at me, this isn't even my problem." She shook her head.

"Uh, actually it's your fault, so it's also your problem. You're still part of this tour until the end." I stated.

A look crossed her face when I said part of this tour instead of band. It was a cross between sadness and guilt and it made me happy that she finally felt bad.

"There really isn't anything we can do." Kim said quietly. "We can't get jobs and we have just enough money to make it to the next city."

"Well what do we have?" Rian asked.

"Plane tickets to Maryland for next week," I answered.

"We could try to trade them in for tickets for tomorrow." Kim added.

"Are you suggesting we drop off the tour?" Jack asked.

Kim nodded, "What else are we going to do? We're so fucked."

I felt my resentment for Taylor skyrocket to the point where I wanted to punch her in the face again.

No one could come up with an answer. We couldn't hustle CD's in lines because ours hadn't come out yet and we barely made anything from merch to begin with.

We all sat in silence, letting the fact that our dreams and hard work were about to go to waste sink in as Pete and Patrick walked up.

"Way so glum chums?" Pete asked.

"Uh, well were kinda out of money and have to drop off of tour," I blurted.

Both Pete and Patrick looked shocked.

"I thought you had a credit card and bank account?" Patrick said.

"Plane tickets and gas are expensive," I mumbled.

"How much longer can you guys stick it out?" Pete asked.

"We're probably going to fly home from San Jose," Kim answered.

I sighed and got up from my chair and started to walk away.

"Where are you going?" Jack asked.

"I, uh, need air? Space? Whatever." I mumbled and walked away. I turned down a random street and followed the sidewalk.

I can't believe this is happening. Everything I had worked so hard for was being viciously yanked away from me because of someone else's stupidity.

I should probably take some blame for every going out that night, but I wasn't. I was trying to have fun and unwind after being stressed out and dumped. My behaviour, while being a tad inappropriate, was justifiable. Taylor's just wasn't.

I saw a random park bench and took a seat. My head was spinning again from anger and the feeling of complete hopelessness.

I wanted to start crying and screaming but what good would that do?

"Mind if I join you?"

I looked up to see Matt stand in front of me. Oh great, another one of my problems. I felt bad for considering Matt as a problem but I was just anger at everyone and everything.

"If you want," I answered and he sat down.

"Are you okay?"

"You know what's funny about that question, is the only time people ever ask that is when you clearly aren't okay."

"I think it's a sign that people care."

I sighed and looked him in the eye. I needed to do this now.

"Matt –" I started but was cut off with a kiss. It was needy and urgent, like he knew what was coming but tried to post pone it.

I pulled back slowly and looked down, "Uh, we need to talk."

"About what?" He tried to play stupid.

"Us, this, whatever you want to call it," I said. "It needs to end now."

"Why?" He asked. He really didn't want to know why. "Is this about Alex?"

I nodded, "you and me both know I'm still in love with him and I can't keep pretending."

"I thought you were into me though?"

"I was, or at least I thought I was for a while. I don't know. I was so confused about my feelings and what you told me about Alex. But in the end, I'm still in love with him and it's not fair to you. You deserve someone who feels the same way about you." I explained.

He was quiet for a minute. He didn't look upset or angry, which I took as a good sign.

"I understand," He finally said and I let out the breath I didn't realize I was holding in. I was expecting a huge blow up or scene or something.

"I'm glad you do." I smiled.

"We can still be friends though, right?" He asked hopefully.

"Of course," I answered. It would be awkward but why shoot him down any more?

I stood up and looked at him, "I guess we should get back to set up."

"Are we really dropping off next show?"

I nodded, "There's nothing left to do."

We walked back to the venue in silence and he went straight to helping while I crawled into the van. So things were over with Flyzik, whatever that thing was. I was at a loss of what to do next.

It wasn't even stubbornness keeping me from talking to him anymore. It was the fear of rejection; the fear that I would pour my heart and soul out to him and he'd walk away.

I sprawled myself out across the unfolded backseat on my stomach and sighed loudly. Why can't an answer just fall from the sky?

-x-

"Kayleigh, wake the fuck up, we play in fifteen minutes," Kim said loudly.

I sprung up and our heads collided.

"Ow, fuck," I said and then started laughing. Kim joined in, rubbing her head.

"At least you're awake," She said.

"I didn't even realize I fell asleep."

"Oh well, just hurry up and get ready."

I crawled across the van and grabbed my bag. I pulled out clean clothes and my makeup. I cleaned up my eye makeup and applied fresh eyeliner. I ran a brush through my straightened hair and then pulled on clean skinnies and a Nirvana shirt.

I tugged on black and white converses as I got out of the van and ran into the venue where everyone else was.

"Wow, you can get ready really fast," Meghan commented as I grabbed my guitar from the stand.

"I know, it comes with waking up late for school almost every day," I said.

Kim appeared behind Meghan, body checking her out of the way.

"Move," She snapped.

Obviously things hadn't improved there.

"What're you going to do when we drop off?" I asked Meghan.

She shrugged, "I don't exactly know. I don't know how to get back home from Maryland, but it's not too far so it shouldn't be hard."

The lights went out and Kim dragged me away before I got a chance to answer her.

-x-

I gave it my all on stage. It was our second last show so why not? I even ventured over to Taylor's side of the stage which I rarely did.

I really didn't want to pack up and move onto the next city. The next city meant our last show.

"Has anyone called our manager to tell him we're dropping off?" I asked as we packed amps and guitars.

"I'll call him from the airport tomorrow," Kim sighed and stacked the amps in the trailer.

Everyone was quiet and withdrawn from any type of conversation.

Once we were packed up we all got into our separate vans and headed towards San Jose. I drove solely for the distraction. I forced myself to concentrate on the road instead of my thoughts. Kim, Taylor and Haylee were already passed out in the back. I could hear Kim's snoring and Taylor's mumbling. It reminded of when Alex used to mumble things in his sleep when he was drunk.

A heart stopping realization hit me with that memory. Where was I going to live when we got back home? Since Alex and I were broken up, I assume that I won't be welcome to living with him anymore.

The realization shocked me to the point where I swerved sharply to one side. I corrected myself instantly. My heart was racing and I could tell if it was from the fact that I was kinda homeless or that I almost ran into the ditch.

I jumped when my phone vibrated next to me. Without checked the I.D I answered.

"I'm driving so unless you want me and my band to die, make it fast."

"I think you almost killed your band anyway," Alex replied. My heart sped up if that was even possible. "What was that?"

"I, uh thought I saw an animal on the road," I lied.

"Maybe you should wake someone up so you can get some sleep," He suggested.

"No, I'm good now," I assured him even though I wasn't so sure myself.

"Alright then," He hung up.

I dropped my phone onto the seat next to me and took a deep breath. Concentrate on the road. We don't want to die right now. I forced myself to count in my head as a distraction as I drove down the dark highway.

-x-

San Jose held a dull, lifeless feeling. It was grey, cloudy and on the verge of raining. The weather matched everyone's moods perfectly as we slowly unloaded the trailers and set up.

I decided today would be a great day to go hangout with the fans in line. I grabbed a marker and wandered over to the lines. Cheering and smiles made me smile back at them. This was the part I was going to miss the most.

I started at the back of the line.

"Is it true you guys are breaking up and leaving tour?" Someone asked as I signed a shirt.

I shook my head, "Not exactly. We have to drop off tour but we aren't breaking up."

"Why are you dropping off?"

"Financial problems," I sighed and kept going. Everyone seemed pretty bummed this was our last show.

I went back to the vans when it started to rain heavily. A clap of thunder made me squeal slightly and Jack and Alex laughed at me as they passed by. It was the first time anyone had laughed all day.

I stepped inside the venue and shook my wet hair out. The atmosphere in the venue was almost as bleak as the weather. I took a seat on a foldable chair placed near all the equipment and sighed. It seemed to become habitual to sigh every five minutes.

"Hey, Kayleigh, can I talk to you?" Pete asked.

I nodded and got up, following him to a quiet corner, curiosity spiking.

-x-

I stood side stage and bounced up and down.

"Your ability to stay some-what happy today blows my mind," Kim commented. If she only knew.

I shrugged, "I'm optimistic."

"I don't know why," She mumbled. I grinned at her cluelessness as I followed her onto the stage.

If we gave it our all last night, we gave it more than we had and the crowd gave back. It was by far the most amazing show we had ever played. I even teared up a couple times.

We came off stage and the good mood vanished in everyone except for me. We all stood side stage and watched Marianas Trench and Fall Out Boy perform after we had packed our stuff.

After their sets we made our way outside into the rain.

"I can't believe that was our last show," Haylee said quietly.

"Well –"

"I can't believe we blew it," Taylor added.

"Can I –" I tried again.

"You blew it, we didn't," Kim snapped.

"HEY SHUT UP I HAVE SOMETHING IMPORTANT TO SAY." I yelled and everyone looked at me. "Thank you."

I reached into my pocket and pulled out the card that Pete had given me.

"What's that?" Kim asked, looking at me like I was stupid.

"This is our second chance," I told her and everyone just kept staring.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Are you guys' stupid?" I chuckled. "This is an unlimited American Express card. This is how we are going to pay for gas and food. This is how we're going to play the rest of the tour."

Haylee screamed in excitement.

"Where did you get that?" Jack asked, looking like he was about to explode in joy.

"Pete gave it to me. He said to use it wisely, but he didn't want to see us have to be cut short for something that is out of our hands," I explained. It blew my mind how amazingly kind he was.

Everyone started hugging and talking at once. I was suddenly lifted off the ground by Matt. He spun me around in the air.

"Thank you," He smiled, putting me down.

"Don't thank me, thank Pete. This was all him." I grinned, but it faded as I saw Alex leaving the group. It was now or never. Kim grabbed my shoulder and spun me around before I could go after him.

"I cannot fucking believe this," She beamed. I couldn't tell if the wetness on her face was tears of joy or rain drops.

I smiled back at her but it faded quickly as I turned to look behind me, trying to see if Alex had come back.

"Go after him," She said, letting go of me.

I spun around and took off in the direction Alex went. The rain was pouring down and I was drenched. I spotted a person walking across the parking lot and ran towards them, recognizing Alex's black leather jacket.

"Alex," I screamed, once I got close enough. He didn't turn so I yelled again. "Alex, wait please."

He turned around as I stopped inches away from his face.

"I'm sorry," I blurted.


	17. Chapter 17

"I love you," I continued before he had a chance to say anything. A single street light in the parking lot was the only light, making it seem like we were the only two in the world right now. "I always have and always will. Nothing will ever change. And I am so sorry it took this happening for me to realize it. I don't want Matt; I don't want anyone else but you. You are the only one I want."

He just stared down at me as I held my breath, preparing for rejection. He caught me off guard when he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into a kiss.

Fireworks went off, butterflies erupted and I swear my heart was about to explode as the rain poured down on us. I miss his lips, his taste. I missed him.

He pulled back, leaving me breathless.

"I'm sorry too," He murmured. "I was an idiot and overreacted and should have apologized a long time ago."

"You didn't overreact," I told him.

"Let's just agree to put it in the past?" He suggested. I nodded and hugged him.

"I missed you," I told him.

"I missed you more," He smiled and I felt warm and fuzzy inside despite being soaked. "I love you."

Hearing him say that again was almost overwhelming. He took me by the hand and we started back to the vans. I was freezing cold and probably on my way to have pneumonia but I didn't care.

Everyone was huddling under the dry part the venue made.

"Hallelujah, they made up," Jack announced as we came into sight.

"It's about time," Kim smiled.

"Finally!" Haylee added.

The fact that everyone was happy we were back together made things even better.

"Alright, let's head to Saint Maria!" Kim said and everyone separated into the vans, except for Alex and I. I grabbed Meghan before she got into the van.

"Hey, do me a favor? Ride in ATL's van?" I said.

She grinned and nodded, grabbing her bag and walking over to their van. Alex and I climbed into the back of the van. I immediately went to my bag and pulled out clean sweats and a shirt. I also grabbed a pair of Alex's sweats that I hadn't given back and threw them at him.

We changed, throwing our wet clothes to one side then made a small little bed thing out of blankets and pillows.

"No sex back there, got it?" Kim called from the front of the van. I giggled while snuggling into the bed with Alex.

"If you insist," I called back.

I laid my head against his barely chest that was radiating heat even though he had been outside in the rain for so long. Our bodies fit together perfectly.

He kissed the top of my head and intertwined our fingers.

"Sing to me," I whispered.

Without asking why he broke into song, only loud enough for me to hear, "Stay awake, get a grip and get out, you're safe from the weight of the world just take a second to set things straight. I'll be fine, even though I'm not always right. I can count on the sun to shine. Dedication takes a life time, but dreams only last for a night."

I drifted off to sleep to Alex's voice, happier than I had been since the start of the tour.

-x-

I woke up with a fuzzy feeling in my stomach and big brown eyes looking back at me.

"Good morning beautiful," Alex grinned, sounding sleepy and sexy.

"Good morning," I smiled, stretching and sighing happily.

"Ready to do something fun today?" He asked.

"Like what?" Kim, who was sitting against the wall of the van across from us, answered for me, but I was thinking the same thing. "We have enough money to keep us from being anorexic and driving. That's it."

"Do we really need money to be happy?" He asked.

Kim and I nodded.

Alex chuckled, "Fine, I'll show you guys how to have fun without money."

We exchanged a doubtful look as he pushed back the blankets and stretched. I sat up and crawled a few feet away, feeling like I couldn't breathe.

"Why does it feel like the Sahara Desert in here?" I fanned myself with a set list from last night.

"Because that's how hot it is outside." Kim said.

"Holy shit," I muttered. Today was a-wear-barely-any-clothes kind of day. I wriggled out of my sweats and shirt and pulled on a pair of jean short shorts. I didn't bother putting my shirt back on.

"Y'know, the heat might not be so bad," Alex grinned as I sprawled out on the floor. I handed him the set list.

"At least fan me while you gawk."

Much to my surprise he actually took it and started waving it, creating a small breeze.

"Damn, I wish I had a boyfriend," Kim half laughed but I saw the longing in her eyes for Jack.

"I don't even know what to tell you about that," Alex said, obviously seeing it too.

She shrugged like it didn't matter.

"Are we in Saint Maria?" Alex asked.

"Yes we are," Haylee answered from the front. "We'll be at the venue in like ten minutes."

Alex nodded and continued fanning me while I picked at a hangnail. Haylee was right about time because ten minutes later I was being dragged out of the van and into the outdoor venue to set up. Alex was suddenly a ball of energy and was ushering everyone to hurry up. We got setup in under and hour compared to our usual two hours.

"Did you pack a bathing suit?" He asked as we hid in the little bit of shade the venue gave us.

"That's a fantastic quest—" I started but was interrupted by a shock of cold water running down my head.

I turned to see Jack laughing with an empty water bottle in his hand. I grabbed Alex's half empty water bottle and threw the water at Jack who stopped laughing when the icy water hit him.

"I'll get you," He warned.

I laughed in doubt and shook my wet hair out.

"About that bathing suit," Alex pestered me. He followed me over to the van and waited some-what patiently next to me as I rummaged through my bag.

"Nope," I shook my head, "No bathing suit."

He grinned, "I think that's slightly better."

I cocked my head to the side, "What?"

"Nothing," He lied and went over to Jack who was still drying himself off. The whispered for a few minutes and Jack grinned and nodded.

"What was that all about?" I asked him when he came back over to me.

"You'll see after the show. We have tomorrow off, right?"

I nodded slowly, "Yeah."

"Good," He grinned again and then disappeared.

I shrugged and decided to have a little bit of fun since it was so hot. I grabbed Haylee and Kim and explained to them what I wanted to do. They quickly agreed and we took a short walk to a dollar store to buy water balloons and cheap water guns. I know Pete said to use the money wisely, but what was $10 spent a little fun in the blazing heat?

We went back to the venue and Kim got a security guard to let us use a hose that was supposed to be for the sprinkler system. We filled up a good 200 balloons in less than half an hour, putting them in small buckets. We filled up the water guns and then came up with a plan.

"Alright, Kayleigh, you have to lure Alex and Jack into the parking lot and we'll ambush them, just make sure they don't have phones. Then we'll get some of the kids in the lines involved.

I nodded and went to look for Alex and Jack. I found them hiding in the shade whispering again.

"Hey, what's up?" I asked casually.

"Nothing," Jack smiled. I went over to Alex and patted his back and front jean pockets for his phone.

"Whoa, frisky are we?" He joked.

I laughed, "I can't find my phone and I need to find Kim."

Jack pulled his out and handed it to me. Perfect. "Use mine."

I dialed Kim, hoping that she'd catch on.

"Jack?"

"No, it's Kayleigh. Where are you?"

"In the parking lot…?" She sounded confused.

"Oh, I'll bring Alex and Jack to help then," I faked then hung up. "Come."

I pulled them along without letting them react. I set Jack's phone down in one of the chairs as we headed towards the parking lot.

"What does Kim need help with?" Jack asked.

"I don't know," I shrugged, "She just said she needed help.

I headed closer to the line where we had agreed to do it and I saw Kim hiding behind a ledge. As we walked by she aimed and threw the red balloon in her hand and nail Alex in the side.

"What the?" He looked around but Kim ducked before he could spot her. Haylee threw her balloon from her hiding spot, getting me instead of Jack.

Out of nowhere Kim yelled, "GET THEM," and a shower of water balloons rained down on the three of us from the crowd on the ledge above us. I burst out laughing while trying to dodge the balloon and get to my stash. I grabbed the bucket and started flinging water balloons at anything that moved. Kim had brought out the water guns and was drenching Alex who was defenseless.

I snuck up the stairs leading to where the crowd was and attacked them with balloons. They turned their attention to me, throwing what they had left. I called a truce and got them to gather around me.

"Do you guys have water with you?" I asked.

Most people nodded.

"Do you guys think you could buy a couple more bottles for during the show?"

They nodded again.

"Good, see you then. You might want to hide your electronics or stay near the back during our set though." I advised, smiling, then went over to the ledge and dropped my two biggest balloons. One got Alex and the other splattered all over Haylee and Jack.

I went back down to their level and was attacked with water guns. I was laughing so hard I could barely breathe and the coldness of the water felt great in the heat.

We finally ran out of water and walked back to the vans sopping wet and laughing.

"I told you you could have fun without money," Alex said, shaking his hair.

"The water balloons cost money," Kim corrected him.

"You just can't let me win, can you?" He chuckled.

"Nope" Kim laughed.

Alex and Jack separated from us to go get ready to play while we dried ourselves and tanned in the sun.

-x-

My curiosity returned and burned all throughout All Time Low's set. What could those two be planning?

We took the stage just as the sun was setting and the sky was a fiery red but the heat just wouldn't give. We played our first three songs and then while I was talking Haylee was taking a gulp of water. I wandered over to her and squeezed the bottle. The water exploded all over her face and clothes.

The crowd, Taylor, Kim and I all laughed as she screamed and started laughing.

Just like I did to Jack earlier she grabbed a spare bottle and chucked it at me, drenching me.

"Do you wanna go?" I joked. "Quick someone throw me some ammo."

A few water bottles were tossed onto the stage and Haylee and I scrambled to get them. This started another water fight between the two of us and even Kim got some because I had terrible aim. Then I turned to the crowd.

"Are you guys boiling out there?" I asked.

They cheered loudly.

"Put away all your electronic or get out of the pit because it's about to get wet," I yelled and sprayed them with water.

As soon as that first bottle had been emptied, water and bottles were flying. We started our next song and the crowd moshed harder than I've ever seen. It was just a hot, wet mess.

We left the stage twenty minutes later, leaving the crowd soggy and out of breath for MT.

"Did you even leave any life in that crowd for us?" Josh joked as I walked past him, wet for the third time today.

I barely had time to catch my breath before Alex and Jack had Kim and I cornered.

"You're coming with us," Alex said, picking me up and throwing me over his shoulder. I laughed, and hit his back.

"Put me down."

"No, this is your punishment for the balloon attack," Jack said, following behind us. He had Kim by the wrist, who looked like she was willing to do anything Jack said.

Alex put me in the back of their van, Kim took shot gun, and Jack took the wheel. He pulled out of the parking lot and drove off into the dark.

"Where are we going?" I asked, noticing that the van had been cleared out other than a few bags.

"Somewhere," Alex said shortly.

"Does everyone else know?" Ki m asked.

"Yeah," Alex nodded, "Well, Matt and Rian know."

"Where are we going?" I asked again, not being able to hide my smile.

Alex didn't answer this time. I sat in silence starting at Alex, hoping that my unwavering stare would make him uncomfortable enough to tell me. Instead, he just kept smiling mischievously at me.

After what seemed like forever, Jack finally stopped the van. I couldn't get out of the van fast enough. I opened the door to reveal a small beach like area.

"What's this?" I asked, as everyone else got out.

"Fun without money," Alex answered.

"And revenge."

"We don't have bathing suits though," Kim said, looking at Jack.

"Neither do we," They grinned.


	18. Chapter 18

Kim and I exchanged glances while Alex and Jack just stood there grinning.

"You have two choices," Jack said, "You go in with or without your clothes, but either way, you're going in."

I shrugged. Why not? Everyone else will be naked too, and it's not like I hadn't seen them naked before. Hell, Jack ran around our hotel room naked just for fun.

"Wait, wait, wait." Kim said. "I'm going to need some alcohol in my system to do this."

"I thought you'd never ask," Jack grinned, reaching into the cooler inside the van. He opened it revealing a bottle of Captain Morgan's and 12 beers.

"I think this is the most prepared you've ever been, Jack," I laughed, reaching for a beer.

Since none of us had eaten getting to the drunken state to take off our clothes wouldn't take long. Jack and Alex grabbed the cooler and Kim grabbed the towels they had packed too. This was bound to be an adventure. The only negative thought that crossed my mind was why Jack had brought Kim instead of Meghan?

We found a spot close to the small doc leading out into the water and set everything down. I sat down in the sand and took another gulp of beer.

"You aren't getting anywhere just sipping beer," Kim said, pulling out the bottle of harder liquor. "I say we confess something, and then take a sip."

"What if we have nothing to confess?" Jack asked.

"You will after the first couple round," She chuckled.

"You first then," I volunteered her.

"I can't stand Meghan," She stated then opened the bottle and drank.

"Does it count if everyone already knows it?" I laughed, taking the bottle from her. "Uh, let's see. Oh, when Pete offered me the credit card, I almost declined because I wanted to go home so badly at that point."

I took my drink and handed it to Alex. "I wanted to apologize the second you walked away from me."

It was Jack's turn. I was anxious to hear his confession.

"I'd rather be in a relationship than single," He said.

That wasn't what I was expecting, but it was news to me. You'd think being Jack, he'd want to be single.

After two more rounds of simple confessions, the alcohol started to hit us and deeper things blurted out, starting with Kim.

"I'm still in love with you," She said, looking right at Jack. He just nodded once as Kim handed me the bottle.

I didn't really have anything left to confess. I handed the bottle to Alex, "Pass, I'm out of things to say."

"Taylor's an awful kisser," Alex said and I laughed.

Jack took the bottle and looked at Kim, "You're still the most beautiful girl I've ever seen." He took his drink, "Let's get naked."

We all stood, wiping the sand off our clothes which was pointless, but an automatic reaction. I pulled off my shirt and unbuttoned my shorts, everyone else following suit. My nerves spiked slightly, and I counted my lucky stars that I shaved yesterday.

The small lake was beautiful, especially at night. The sand was soft between my toes as I pulled off my shorts, not daring to make eye contact with anyone. I snuck a peek over at Alex who had nothing but boxers left. I started at his body, illuminated by the moonlight. Just as my last piece of clothing hit the ground, I was scooped up without warning and Alex was running towards the doc.

I had just enough time to think about how cold the water was going to be before taking a deep breath as we both plunged into the water.

The cold water was shocking but felt great at the same time. Alex let me go and we swam to the surface just as Jack and Kim jumped into the lake.

"Holy titty fuck that's fucking cold," Jack yelled, shaking his hair out.

"My balls are freezing," Alex announced.

"So are my boobs," I added, cupping myself in the water.

"I can help with that," Alex grinned, swimming over to me and replacing my hands.

Despite the lack of feel in body parts, the water was perfect.

"Let's play Marco Polo," Jack suggested.

"You're it then," Kim said, swimming away. Alex and I separated and swam in different directions as Jack closed his eyes.

I swam over to the doc and hid under it, trying not to squeal at all the seaweed brushing against my legs.

"Marco," Jack called out, slowly moving forward.

"Polo," Kim called behind him.

He turned around and Alex called out, making him spin back around. They continued this pattern, me joining in when he got too close to one of them. It was amusing watching him go back and forth instead of one solid direction. He finally cornered Kim and got her, who then got Alex.

As soon as Alex closed his eyes, he dove for me. I tried to swim away but got caught in the seaweed. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me against his body.

"I got you," His whispered in my ear. I turned around, wrapping my legs around his waist and kissed him, running my fingers through his wet hair and tasting the liquor still on his lips.

"Game over, I assume," Jack chuckled after we didn't break apart right away. I heard him and Kim get out of the water.

Alex broke away from me to catch his breath and grinned.

"Hold your breath," He said. I looked at him confused while taking a deep breath. He pulled me under water with him. I held onto him tighter and opened my eyes but it was too dark to see anything. I felt his lips against mine again and we attempted to kiss. It wasn't as easy as it seemed.

I giggled, momentarily forgetting we were under water and let out all my air. Alex swam back to the top with me attached and we gasped for air.

"Definitely not as easy as people on TV make it seem," He said.

I nodded in agreement then shivered. Without even asking, he maneuvered me so I was on his back and he went back to the shore. Jack and Kim had disappeared so we didn't have to worry about anything. I peeled my wet body from his and reached for a towel. I wrapped it around me and sat next to Alex.

He wrapped his arm around me and leaned back so we were lying in the sand with my head on his chest.

I gazed up at the stars, relaxing in the perfect moment.

"I love you," He said, kissing my cheek as I turned to look at him.

"I love you too," I murmured back.

It was days and nights like this that reminded me why I loved what I did. Everything was perfect. I leaned into him and kissed him slowly. He abruptly rolled us over, my towel falling off in the process, and hovered above me.

"You are beautiful," He said and kissed me again.

I smiled as my hands explored every inch of his body while he trailed kisses down my neck. Small droplets of water from his hair dripped onto my shoulders. He brought his mouth back to mine and bite my lip, driving me crazy. I slowly wrapped the towel from his waist, hoping that Kim and Jack wouldn't come back any time soon.

-x-

I woke up to a burning feeling on my back. I opened my eyes, expecting to see the inside of a van but instead I saw sand.

For a moment I was confused and disorientated until memories from last night flooded back, making me smile to myself.

I sighed happily while adjusting the towel covering my lower half when I heard voices and movement from a distance. I turned my head to see Jack and Kim emerge from a small path in the trees.

"Good morning," Kim smiled. Someone got laid. I blocked out all the questions that were tempting to spit out at her, but instead smiled back.

"Alex, cover up your white ass," Jack said to him. Without lifting his head, he felt around, grabbing my towel and yanking it off me.

"Hey!" I yelled, taking it back.

"My bad," He mumbled, finally pulling his head off the sandy ground. Grains of sand stuck to his face and his hair stood out in different directions.

"Fun night?" Kim winked. "You guys are so damn loud."

My blush gave away the answer while I reached for my clothes. My entire body hurt from sleeping in the sand.

"Whoa!" Jack yelled at me once I had enough clothes on to stand up and stretch. My back and arms burned in pain.

"Holy crap, Kay, your back!" Kim exclaimed. I assumed my back was as bright red as my arms were.

"Well then, no more sleeping on the beach," I chuckled, wincing at the pain trying to put on a shirt brought. "Fuck it."

I pulled my shorts on and left it at that.

"What time is it?" Alex asked, pulling his jeans on and brushing off sand.

"Time for us to start driving to LA since everyone else left." Jack said.

"They all fit in that little van?" I asked.

"They didn't have much of a choice. "We're kinda three hours behind."

"Whoops," I shrugged.

We walked back to the van and got in. I was hoping it was going to be nice and cool, opposed to outside, but man was I wrong. It was suffocatingly hot which didn't help my sunburn.

I sprawled out in the back while Jack drove and Kim took shot gun. I was still incredibly tired from the previous night, so I made Alex my pillow and fell asleep to the sound of his heartbeat.

-x-

I woke up to nice, cool air, thanks to the A.C, and in LA.

I really didn't want to get out of the van and unload but I didn't have much of a choice. I rummaged through my bag and found a loose fitting shirt that wouldn't irritate my back. I threw it on alone with my shoes and jumped out of the van.

I found Jack and Kim sitting in the shade.

"Where is everyone?" I asked.

"Exploring the city," Kim answered.

"What about unloading?"

"We already did it."

"Oh," I sat on the cooler next to them and we talked until Jack left to go find a bathroom. I decided now was a great time to interrogate Kim.

"So what happened between you two last night?"

She shrugged, "Drunken sex."

"And you're okay with that?"

"We're on speaking terms now even though he knows how I feel for him," She said.

"What about Meghan?"

"What about her? They aren't official together."

"So you're okay with him half dating her and half dating you? Because that's what it seems like he's doing." I said bluntly.

She sighed, "No, but I just want him so badly and this seems like the only way I can have him. I don't want to share but since Meghan's in the picture."

"Why not just make it clear to him it's either you or her?"

"Who do you really think he's going to pick?"

"I don't know," I said honestly. I didn't understand what Jack was doing other than being a manwhore about this.

I sighed as Jack came back, completely oblivious to everything around him.

"We play in an hour; someone should call everyone and get them back here so we can get a buzz before the show." He suggested.

I texted Alex and told him to come back. I didn't know who he was with but I assumed they all probably left as a group.

Jack cracked a beer and handed it to Kim who took a long chug from it. I got the feeling tonight was going to be messy.

-x-

After a wild show, someone suggested that we spend the surprisingly large amount of merch tips we made and go party. I agreed, we were in Los Angeles so why not?

Vinny's persuasive smile got everyone else to agree too, other than Taylor, of course. We got all dressed up, and walked from the venue down Sunset Boulevard. We entered the first club we saw with ease and I went straight to the bar.

The bartender was female which posed a slight problem until Alex joined me. He gave her a stomach dropping smile.

"Can I get three paralyzers and six shots of whiskey?" He asked.

She poured the drinks without questions, and slipped him her number before we walked away. He crumpled up the piece of paper, dropping it on the ground which made me smile.

After taking a couple shots, I dragged Kim and Alex onto the dance floor, making them dance with me. Memories from the last time I was in a club flashed in time with the strobe lights. I was really hoping nothing like that would happen this time.

Hours later, everything was going smoothly and I was having fun.

My feet started to hurt from dancing so I joined Pete and Patrick who had tagged along at the table. There was a third person who I instantly recognized and tried so hard to not squeal.

"Who's this?" Gabe asked as I sat down.

"Kayleigh," Pete answered. "The lead singer of For The Record."

"How old?"

"Seventeen," I answered, giggling.

"Whoa! Minor alter. Dammit. And she's hot too." He grinned at me.

I blushed and took a sip of the drink in front of me. This night couldn't get any better.

After idle conversation with Pete and Gabe, I pushed my way back to Alex and Kim and resumed dance. I only last one song because I started feelings over heated. I made my way off the dance floor and to the exit, almost falling, but making it safely out of the club.

The refreshing air felt great against my hot skin. I breathed in the air that was clean of smoke and smell of sweat. I walked over and leaned against the wall of a random building next to the club and collected myself, letting my heart rate drop back to normal.

"Kayleigh?" Someone asked from the shadows and my heart beat furiously in my chest again.

"Who's there?" I asked, soundly a lot more sure of myself than I felt.

A middle aged woman with fried, platinum blonde hair and eyes that matched mine stepped into the light.

"Mom?" My jaw dropped.


	19. Chapter 19

If my jaw could hit the ground it would've. I stared back at the woman who gave birth to me. She was a good four inches taller than me, even in my heels. Her face looked a lot older than 40, with sunk back, bruised eyes and hollow cheeks. Her eyes were identical to mine, just lacking life and emotion.

A leather jacket and short skirt hung off her frail frame that looked like it was about to collapse any minute.

My mother had become a cheap hooker.

"What are you here?" I managed while she lit a cigarette and took a drag.

"I live here, and I heard your band was in town," She said, blowing smoke out, and then grinned, "Of course you're out party. You're a partier, aren't you? Just like me."

I did little to hide my disgust, "I'm nothing like you. I have dreams, ambition and no addiction to drugs."

"I had dreams and ambition too, but you'll soon see that nothing ever works out," She laughed humourlessly.

I opened my mouth to retort when Alex appeared at my side.

"Hey, what's going on? You've been gone for a while," He asked, then looked over at my mother, obviously not recognizing her, "Who's this?"

"Madeline White," Mom answered.

"Also known as my mother," I followed up bitterly.

Alex tried to contain his shock, only letting his eyebrows shoot up. "Oh, I didn't even recognize you."

"Neither did I." I muttered.

"Are you going to introduce us, Kayleigh Anne?" Mom asked impatiently.

"Mom, this is Alex, my boyfriend. Alex, this is my mother." I rolled my eyes.

Alex just nodded, not showing is usual politeness.

"I see you still use Dad's last name," I commented.

"Ah, yes. How is your father?"

"I wouldn't know he disowned me a couple weeks ago."

She actually showed a hint of shock, "Why?"

"My soon to be ex-guitarist is a bitch," I stated.

She got the hint I wasn't going to say anything else.

Alex cleared his throat, "I think we should go back in."

"Agreed," I nodded towards him then looked back at my mother, "Bye."

I went to turn away but she caught my arm and pulled me towards her, "Love will destroy you faster than any drug." She mumbled into my ear and cast a glance at Alex who had stop and was looking at us confused.

I scoffed, "I doubt that."

Without another word, I turned away from her and walked over to Alex, taking his hand. We went to re-enter the club but the bouncer stopped us.

"How old are you?" He asked suspiciously.

"18," I lied.

He looked amused, "You think I'm actually going to believe that? You don't look a day over 16. You're not getting into this club."

I sighed deeply, not bothering to argue. I led Alex away from the club, my annoyance growing more and more.

"Do you just want to head back to the van?" Alex asked, noticing my mood.

I sighed, "I don't know. I don't really care."

He laced our fingers together again and pulled me into him.

"Are you okay?"

"I don't know," I answered. "It was just so weird seeing her and knowing that after this long, she still doesn't give a shit about me, or anything else except sex and drugs."

It hurt knowing that my mother cared more about being a hooker than me. I felt tears well up in my eyes, and tried to blink them away.

He released me from the embrace he had me in and dropped one arm to my waist and the other tilted my chin up, my eyes meeting his dark ones. "I know it's not much, and won't replace your mother, but I promise to never ever throw you away or abandon you like she has. You are my world and I will give anything to see you happy. I love you."

A single tear rolled down my cheek as he bent down and kissed me tenderly.

"I love you so much," I whispered when he pulled back.

He pressed his forehead against mine and grinned as I wrapped my arms around his neck.

"Dudes!" Kim yelled, coming over to us with Jack, Matt and Haylee.

"What's going on?" Haylee asked.

"Dude, mom's here," I said.

"What?" Kim yelled.

I nodded, "She had the audacity to talk to me too."

"What was said?" Jack asked.

I shrugged, "She basically told me my dreams are worthless and was surprised Dad disowned me."

Why did I still call them mom and dad when neither of them played the role anymore?

"I'm sorry, but she's a fucking bitch," Kim said.

"I agree," I nodded. "She's so far gone on drugs and random cock it's not even funny anymore."

"Why didn't you come back into the club?" Matt asked. This was the first time since Alex and I got back together that we had spoken.

"Mr. Dickhole bouncer guy caught on to the fact that we aren't of age," Alex answered.

"Fuck," Haylee mumbled.

"Oh well. I didn't really want to go back in anyway." I said

"Is it time we head back to the vans?" Jack asked.

I nodded and we started to head back. Alex swung our arms and kept hitting Jack in the ass, who would giggle. It was the most childish and entertaining thing I had ever seen.

I was half expecting the party to carry on at the buses but everyone was almost sober by the time we got there, we all separated into our vans and crashed right away.

-x-

"Rise and shine princess!" Kim yelled. "We're home bound baby and we have a flight to catch in three hours."

Remember when Kim was a quiet, bitchy person in the morning? I missed that. I stretched and sat up, rubbing my eyes and then wiped the black residue on Alex next to me.

I threw my hair into a messy bun and tossed all the clothes surrounding my bag into it, whether they were mine or not.

"There, I'm packed and ready." I announced and laid back down.

"You aren't going to back to sleep," Kim said.

"Why not?" I whined.

"Because we're at the airport already," Haylee said and I felt the van come to a stop.

"Uggggh," I groaned and sat back up. I poked Alex's cheek. He opened one eye.

"Hmmm?"

"I can see your morning wood," I said, trying to get him to move.

"That's nice," He mumbled.

I realized that that wasn't the best way to get him to get up. He rolled onto his back and stretched. It took this opportunity to poke him in the side. He twitched violently and giggled like a little girl, making me burst into laughter. I poked him again, getting the same result. I couldn't breathe from laughing so hard at his reaction.

He unexpectedly sat up, grabbing me, pinning me down and began to tickle me all in one swift movement. My sides, stomach and face hurt from laughing so hard.

"I will pee on you," I threatened between laughs.

"Hey, lovers, stop torturing each other and let's go," Kim said, opening the van door, letting the bright morning sun in.

I squinted while Alex climbed off of me and grabbed his shirt. We got out of the van, hauling out bags behind us and followed everyone into LAX.

Thee huge lines, customs and a long wait later we were on the flight back home. Haylee switched me seats so I could sit with Alex. I leaned my head on his shoulder and slept the entire way home.

Once we got off the plane we regrouped and decided what to do next.

"Dude, we're home for three days, I want my own bed!" Kim declared.

"If I get into my own bed, I might not want to leave it again," Haylee joked.

"What about MT and FOB?" Rian asked.

"They have buses," Kim shrugged.

"So I say we go home to our own beds and relax. This past month has been insane."

"What about me?" Meghan asked.

"I'd offer to let you come with me, but I don't live in my house anymore," I said. This could be a problem.

Kim didn't bother to hide her smirk which quickly turned into a glare when Jack spoke up.

"Stay with me," He offered, "It's no big deal."

It is a big deal to Kim, but either you're too dumb to see, or are willfully ignoring it. I think it was time for someone to intervene.

Alex and I were the first to be dropped off. It felt nice to be looking at something familiar for the rest time in a month that wasn't a van.

We grabbed our bags and made our way up the short path.

"Does your mom know we're coming home?" I asked as Alex unlocked the door.

"I don't think so," He smiled and we entered quietly.

We set our bags down and I followed Alex to the living room where we could hear the TV. Isobel and Peter were completely oblivious to Alex and I standing in the door way.

"Hey mom," Alex said loudly when the commercials started.

She jumped and they both turned towards us, breaking out into huge grins.

"Alex! Kayleigh! I didn't know you were going to be home!" Isobel gasped, jumping up from her seat and giving Alex a huge hug.

"I wanted to surprise you," He grinned, hugging her back. It was so cute. "I missed you."

"I missed you too! You too, Kayleigh!" She said, letting him go and hugging me. It was nice to be reminded that I still had parental figures, even if they weren't blood related.

"You two must be tired and jetlagged," She said. "Why don't you guys head to bed early and I'll cook you guys breakfast, since I'm assuming you didn't eat too well on the road."

That was an understatement. I swear, I had lost weight from either not eating or sweating it all off on stage.

We hauled our bags up the stairs to Alex's room and both collapsed on his unmade bed. The scent, the scene and the soft mattress were all so familiar and comforting.

"Oh God, I've missed my own bed so much," Alex sighed, throwing an arm around my waist.

"I know," I agreed. "Can we just take your mattress and throw it in the back of the van?"

"If it would fit, I'd totally do it."

"We'll get a bigger van," I chuckled.

"With what money?"

We both were silent for a minute.

"Do you think I should ask to borrow a little bit of money off of mom and dad?" He asked.

"Well, we've still got enough on the card Pete gave us to last until the end of tour. I guess when we get back again, it's time to find jobs and hope all this hard work paid off," I said.

"Whatever happens," He said, scooting closer to me, "as long as I have you, I know everything will be alright."

His way with words made me want to melt. I kissed him softly, but it quickly heated up as he climbed on top of me.

"The one thing I like about this bed," He whispered in my ear as he pulled my shirt off, "is that it doesn't squeak at all."

I giggled before kissing him again as all worried went out the window.

-x-

I woke up feeling warm and fuzzy again. If this feeling never left me, it would be too soon. I turned my head to look at Alex who was still sleeping. His hair hung in his eyes, his lips slightly parted as he breathed. Perfect didn't even begin to describe this moment, or him. It was like I was still dreaming.

I watched his eyes flutter open, and his head turn automatically to me.

"Good morning beautiful," He mumbled in that thick, sleepy voice that drove me wild.

Yup, definitely still dreaming. The door opened and Alex's mom came in along with the scent of pancakes and bacon.

"Oh, good, you are already awake. Breakfast will be ready in ten minutes," She smiled then left.

We untangled ourselves from each other and the bed sheets, putting on semi-clean clothes then made our way downstairs.

Breakfast tasted amazing after living off of junk food for a month. After Alex and I cleaned up I jumped into the shower and decided now was a great time to take a leisurely stroll over to Jack's. I dressed in my favorite jean short shorts and an over-sized Fall Out Boy shirt I snagged from their merch. I bunched it up and tied it to the side with an elastic band.

"Where you off to?" Alex asked as I half assed dried my hair.

"Just a walk," I shrugged, "and if I happen to stroll by Jack's house I just might demand to know what's going on with him."

"Ahhh," Alex nodded, "I don't even know what's going on there. He won't talk about it."

"Well, if I have to duct tape him to a chair, so be it." I chuckled, only half kidding.

"You still might not get anything out of him then," Alex smiled. "But good luck."

I pressed a quick kiss against his soft lips and left his room and house. I walked down the familiar streets, taking the long way to Jack's house, reminiscing in the memories that almost every block brought.

I finally reached Jack's house and knocked on the door. To my surprise, he was wide awake and decently dressed.

"Oh, hey Kay, what's up?" He smiled lazily.

"Is Meghan here?" I asked.

"Nope, she went to go—"

"Good, we need to talk."

-x-

I am SO sorry this took so long to update. I've been busy and don't have much drive to write much thanks to writers block. And I'm sorry it's starting to suck. I might end it early :P


	20. Chapter 20

"About what?" He asked as I breezed into his empty house. He followed me on my heels into the living room. I took a seat on the edge of the couch as he flopped across the adjacent one.

"So what's this about?" He asked again.

"You're going to explain to me word for fucking word what the hell is going through your head." I said. "What are you doing with Kim and Meghan?"

"Oh, this," He mumbled looking away.

"Yes, this," I nodded. "And I'm not leaving until this is sorted out."

He sighed loudly. "I can't explain to you what I'm doing because I don't even know what I'm doing."

"So what, are you just going to lead them both on until one of them gets sick of being played with and leaves and then stay with the other so you don't have to make the decision yourself."

He stayed silent for a moment. "When you put it so harshly…"

"Because it is harsh."

Another silence, this time stretching longer.

This was going to take a while.

"Who do you think I should pick?" He finally asked.

"That's not my decision to make."

"Then why are you here?"

"Because you're fucking with my best friend and that's not cool. What would you do if I was bouncing back and forth between Alex and Matt?"

He nodded in understandment and looked down at the floor.

Two hours later of me asking questions, him answering them honestly and a lot of pauses Jack sighed and I knew we weren't going to get anywhere.

"Look, I know I said I wouldn't leave until you sorted this out," I said, "but you really can't make a decision on a whim and then end up regretting it. You need time to think."

He looked extremely relieved and nodded, "Okay."

"I hope you do know that I'm not pressuring you into being with Kim too. I just don't want to see her get hurt any more than she already is," I added in.

"I totally understand."

We both stood up and without warning he pulled me into a friendly hug. Jack always gave the most comforting hugs. I pulled back and he walked with me to the door.

"How're you and Alex?" He asked while I put my shoes on.

An instant smile spread across my face, "Great."

"Good. He really does love you."

"I know." I said, still smiling. "It's taken a lot of time, but I finally can say that with full confidence."

"So when's the wedding?"

"October 28th," I joked. "Actually, no, I'd want a spring wedding."

"But I though you wanted an autumn wedding?"

"I know, but Alex would want a spring wedding," I grinned again

"This is why you two are meant to be together," Jack smiled. "I'll walk with you back to Alex's, okay?"

I shrugged and followed him out of the house. Somehow we ended up racing the last three blocks for no reason. We stepped into Alex's house breathing hard and laughing. I stopped laughing when I realized Alex had a houseful of people.

"What's going?" I asked. It's not every day you walk into a house full of your friends and band without something happening.

I walked into the living room where most people were and sat next to Alex. He kissed my cheek as Matt started talking.

"For reasons still unknown to us, the last three shows have been cancelled," He explained. "So tonight's the last show."

Everything made sense. "I assume we will be partying all night then?"

"You know it," Kim said. "I convinced mom to buy us enough alcohol to last us all night so we don't have to scrounge."

"And mom and dad won't be home tonight," Alex added.

Kim handed me a drink and I took a sip. I found it amusing since it was only late afternoon. We spent most of the time sitting around drinking and laughing at all the good times we had on tour, and just together in general.

We packed up our mini party and headed to the venue, all of us at least tipsy. It was a good thing Matt and Vinny dropped the equipment off at the venue before going to Alex's.

Setting up was a challenge, mainly because none of us could stop laughing. Pete stood on the side lines almost peeing at our terrible attempts to organize the stage. Finally, the venue workers stepped in, giving us all disapproving looks that we laughed off.

We decided to go hangout with the crowd before doors opened, because it was our home show and we actually knew a lot of people coming.

Questions were thrown left, right and center as we made our way down the line. I was surprised to see Carly and Alexis standing in the line.

She smirked at me as Alex walked up to them. Liquid confidence controlled me as I left the group I was standing with and joined them.

Neither of them looked too pleased as Alex wrapped an arm around my waist.

"Oh, you guys are still together?" Carly asked.

"I heard you guys were over." Alexis added.

I smirked, "Yes we are."

Both of them scowled as we walked away. It pleased me that they were so jealous. That's when I became aware of all the other jealous stares from the girls as we walked past them. Every girl was either starting longingly at Alex or glaring at me.

As long as they didn't try anything, they could stare all they wanted.

We went back inside the venue and the initial buzz had worn off. Now we were all just giddy and happy. I tried to block out the thoughts of what was going to happen after this tour as I took another drink from the beer bottle Haylee gave me.

Before another worried thought could cross my mind, a little reminder went off in my head. This was Taylor's last show with us. I wasn't going back on my promise to kick her out. She had been really quiet and withdrawn lately, which was nice, but I knew the second I gave her any hope of continuing on in the band, she'd go right back to the way she was.

Kim walked pasted and I caught her arm.

"Do you think Taylor realizes this is the last time she's stepping on stage?" I asked

"I think so," Kim said. "She's out there with Alexis and Carly so."

"Of course she goes to her back up bitches." I rolled my eyes, glad that her stress would be gone soon.

Speaking of the fucking devil, the door opened and Taylor entered, Alexis and Carly following her in.

"Excuse you, what are they doing here?" Kim jumped.

"They're with me," Taylor shrugged.

"I don't care," I snapped. "They're not welcome here."

"But they're my guests, and you two always have people back here." Taylor argued.

"Yes, well, we're also still members of this band. And in exactly two hours, you won't be." I retorted.

I saw Alexis turn to hide a snicker as Taylor made an annoyed sound.

"My God you two are two of the bitchiest girls I've ever met."

"Oh, that hurt so much," Kim said sarcastically.

All I could do is laugh. Taylor spun around and left, the two younger girls following suit, just like they always do.

"Remember when she wasn't a bitch?" Kim asked.

"Nope," I shook my head and chugged the rest of my drink as the lights went out and Alex ran up to me, scooping me into a breath taking kiss before running towards the stage.

I stood staring at him from side stage with a huge grin on my face until Kim sighed. I assumed that Jack hadn't made a decision.

"I don't even know what he sees in her," She said, referring to Meg.

"You liked her at first," I pointed out.

"Before she fucked with Jack," She answered.

"Y'know, if it hadn't had been Meghan, it would've been someone else," I said. I wasn't 100% sure on that, but whatever made her feel better.

She sighed again as Jack looked over from his side of the stage at us. Break Out! Break Out! ended and before Alex could start talking, Jack jumped in.

"I have something to say!" He announced and everyone went silent. "I've been kind of stupid lately and I made a few mistakes on tour and I think it's time to fix those mistakes and admit what I've known for a really long time."

The crowd cheered as he took a long breath and prepared himself. I desperately hoped he was going to say what both Kim and I wanted to say.

"I'm in love."

The crowed cooed and awed.

"With who?" Someone screamed.

Jack broke out into a huge smile, "Kim Davis."

Kim gasped beside me. "Did he just say that? In front of almost 2,000 people? Please tell me I'm not dreaming!"

Before I had the chance to respond, Jack had made his way over and pulled Kim into a long kiss. I was so happy for them.

Jack went back on stage, leaving Kim jumping up and down.

We finished watching ATL's performance and then started to get ready for ours. I was more nervous for this show than any other. There were so many people from school and all over the city that we knew here it was nerve racking.

When we finally got onto the stage, I was shaking. I was so glad I could control myself and managed to hide it. By the third song, everyone was so into it, it was amazing. It was almost heartbreaking to walk off that stage when our set was finished

-x-

The rest of the show was great. Marianas Trench and Fall Out Boy were perfect, as always. It sucked to say our goodbyes, but Pete promised to try to take us on tour again because our drama was entertaining. Reality finally sunk in that I had actually gone on tour with them and an emotion high started.

Once we took everything down we went back to Alex's. Somehow word had gotten out and the small party had turned into a huge one. People were everywhere, congratulating us and just having a good time.

Thankfully, and surprisingly, there was no drama. It was just a good time with good people. As much as I was going to miss touring, it was good to be home with familiar people and places.

In the early hours of the morning, people started clearing out, and by early hours, I mean 6AM. It's what happens when you're drunk and high on your own happiness.

It was back down to just me, Alex, Jack, Kim and Haylee. We lounged across the living room couches in a happy hazy, not really talking.

I was just falling asleep when my cell phone rang from across the room. I sighed and pulled myself out of Alex's arms and answered it.

"Hello?" I mumbled.

"Kayleigh! I know it's early but I thought I should give you a call," Richard said. "How was the tour?"

"It was great," I said yawning.

"That's great. So I suppose you'd be interested in going on another tour?" He asked.

"Hold on," I told him.

All signs of tiredness disappeared. I jumped across the room and put my phone on speaker. Everyone looked at me confused.

"Alright, go."

"It would be another short tour, since you guys start school soon, but I thought with the release of For the Records album at the end of this month, it would be the perfect thing to do." He explained.

"Who would it be with?" I asked.

"You Me At Six and Paramore," He answered. "Both you and All Time Low would be supporting bands again."

"How could we say no?" Kim asked, laughing.

"Great! See you all in two weeks." He said then hung up.

"Fuck yeah." Jack yelled.

I was happy all over. Another tour this soon? The first one was amazing; I could only guess what the next one would be like.

So this is what it was like to have your dreams start to actually come true?

I snuggled down with Alex on the couch; the rhythmic beat of his heart was soothing.

"What do you think this next tour has in store for us this time?" I asked sleepily.

"I don't know, but I do know that as long as I've got you, it will be perfect," He said, kissing my forehead.

I grinned into his chest, "I love you."

"I love you, too."

-x-

The end (:

I know it's short and kinda sucks, but if I drag this one out any longer, it will get even worse so. But don't worry! I'll make an epilogue if you guys want. AND, I might even start another one, if you guys are interested.

Contact me on tumblr; .com OR twitter; /squishyllamas and tell me what you think (:


	21. Epilogue

Two years later:

"And the award for best rock video goes to…"

My arm had almost gone numb from Kim squeezing so hard, and Haylee's nails digging into my other side.

The moment of suspense felt like years.

"…For the Record!"

The entire auditorium erupted into applause as my bladder almost lost control. Kim and Haylee just up and squealed in delight. I stood up and before we made our way to the stage, I was pulled into a breath taking kiss.

"Congratulations," Alex smiled.

"Thank you," I said before following the rest of my band on to the stage.

Once we got up there, the award was handed to me and we clustered around the microphone. We waited until the applause died down to speak. Kim and Haylee gave me the go-ahead to do the speech.

"Oh wow," I said, and chuckled. "This is unbelievable. If you would have told me three years ago that I'd be up here accepting our first MVA at 20, I wouldn't have believed you at all. This has been such an incredible journey from the start and we are so thankful for your support and love."

I dove into a long list of thank you's to people I didn't even think I would remember in a moment like this.

"And finally I'd like to thank my fiancé, Alex for all his love and support." I concluded, looking at him.

Everyone cheered again as we left the stage and entered the back stage area.

"Holy fuck!" I half yelled.

"I can't believe we won!" Haylee said.

"That was nerve racking and I wasn't even talking." Crystal said.

Crystal had taken Taylor's spot in the band. She was a really talented guitarist, and understood our humour. We found her right before going on tour when she showed up at Alex's door with a guitar after hearing Taylor was kicked out.

Her talent blew us away and that fact that she was so blunt and ready to go so it wasn't hard to give her the spot. Ever since then the band has been growing and each day is amazing.

We finished our senior year together without a problem, doing a few tours during our breaks. All Time Low's album debuted at #1 and ours at #3. After grad, All Time Low did a tour with Blink 182, a dream come true for all of them, while we did a shorter tour with Hey Monday and Forever The Sickest Kids.

After a year of touring, both bands started working on another album. Ours is going to be released within the next couple of days and All Time Low's was dropped in July.

Alex and my relationship had been steady this entire time, with only a few rough patches. Touring had made our trust in each other skyrocket.

Everything in my life had been going perfect and I didn't think it would get any better until a few weeks ago when Alex pulled me aside from everyone while we were at dinner. He looked nervous which made me nervous.

"So, I've been thinking," He started while my heart jumped into my throat. "We've been together for three years officially, but it feels like so much longer than that. I love you with every fibre of my being and I don't ever want to be with anyone else but you."

A grin broke out across his face as he dropped down to one knee and I swear my heart almost stopped.

"Kayleigh Anne White, will you make me the happiest man on earth by marrying me?" He asked while pulling out a ring. It sparkled in the dim light of the restaurant.

Tears of joy filled my eyes as I whispered, "Yes."

His smile got even bigger, if that was possible, and he slipped my promise ring off, and the engagement ring on.

We made our way back to the table as I wiped away the tears.

"What just happened?" Haylee asked as we took our seats.

I looked at Alex, smiling before answering.

"We're getting married," I announced.

The entire table cheered.

"Finally!" Rian said.

"Is there going to be cake?" Jack asked.

I laughed, "Yes Jack, there will be cake."

Wedding plans were thrown around for the rest night.

After that night, things just kept getting better. And now here we are, accepting our first music award. Everything that had happened was more than I could have dreamt in my wildest dreams.

We took our seats again during the break and watched the rest of the awards ceremony, All Time Low winning best single of the year.

We went back to the hotel after everything was over.

"Wow, that was incredible," Alex said, loosening his tie, making him look even hotter than he already did.

I nodded in agreement, "I still can't believe that happened."

I went into the bedroom and grabbed my bag, hauling it into the bathroom to change from my dress into pajamas. When I came out, Alex had disappeared from the living room.

I re-entered the bedroom to find the room dimly lit with French vanilla candles and a single rose lying on the bed.

I was speechless as Alex appeared behind me, wrapping his arms around me.

"Did you like it?" He whispered.

I nodded, "It's beautiful."

"Just like you."

I blushed as if it was the first time hearing it from him.

He scooped me up and carried me over to the bed, carefully laying me down after moving the rose. He pulled back the covers and we slipped between them.

Then he kissed me, his soft lips making my toes tingle and Goosebumps rise on my arms. I pulled back, staring into his dark eyes.

"Thank you," I said.

"For what?"

"Making me believe in love again."


End file.
